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I wish I had better news to report....

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Unfortunately, the results have come back positive for infiltrating ductal carcinoma. It's the most common type of cancer. I'm going in for a lumpectomy in the morning and won't know stage or anything more until the end of the week. I'm still hopeful that we caught it early enough that it has not had a chance to spread, and so should you be, also.

I have pulled my paper for the International Medieval Congress, which clearly I am not going to get done in time at this point. I still plan to go to the conference and to preside over my session.

I am not even thinking about the doctoral program until I have a clearer and more firm prognosis.

Hang on - just when you thought things were winding down, this blog's about to get a lot more interesting. Let's all hope for a happy ending.


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20 Comments

Posted

All my best wishes for you!

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Posted

Oh wow, I'm so sorry. I really hope that you'll get some better news later this week. I've been silently following this blog for a while now, and have been checking it daily since April 1st. What a crappy occasion to write my first comment... I wish you all the best!

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Posted

My thoughts are with you, crossing my fingers for good news!

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Posted

It occurred to me that it is now April 11 as I was fielding calls from family members tonight. Because of the proximity to April 15, I am going to be ethical and call the graduate program tomorrow to ask if there is the possibility of a deferral given the circumstances. Any way you dice it, I'm in treatment for the next nine months. I cannot leave my job/health insurance right now, obviously - so I think it is only fair to give them the chance to give this spot to someone on the waitlist. Hopefully, I will be able to defer a year and go in healthy and whole. I am heartbroken, after everything it took to get here - but I just think it is the ethical and responsible thing to do. I'm sitting on an admit I know I currently cannot accept for this year. Someone else is sitting on the waitlist for that funding. No matter what tomorrow brings, I'm not starting in the fall now...so. It's the right thing to do, right? I think it is.

I think I might cry a little, though.

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Posted

I'm so sorry to hear that! My thoughts are with you, hoping that you'll get some good news soon.

I really admire your ability to be so mindful of others; I hope that the school will agree to the deferral.

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Posted

So sorry to hear your news. You sound like an amazing person. I can't imagine your school not being willing to wait a year for you! Good luck -- wishing you all the best.

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Posted

I'm so sorry to hear this. My heart breaks for everything that you've gone through to get to this point only to get this news. I hope that everything works out with the school and that they are able to give you a deferral. I also hope for the best with your lumpectomy tomorrow and that the cancer has been caught at it's earliest and that it hasn't spread. I know that you can beat this as you have so many other challenges you've faced on the road to grad school. You have my thoughts and well wishes.

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Posted

I'm keeping my fingers crossed so that you caught it in a very early stage. I know how long and consuming this process can be for you, but you'll overcome it. Your graduate program will wait for you with full funding for next year and in a few years this will only look like a bad dream and a stone on your way to success. Think positive!!! You have all our support and good vibes!!&nbsp;<img src="http://forum.thegradcafe.com/public/style_emoticons/default/smile.gif" alt=":)" class="bbc_emoticon">&nbsp;Best of luck tomorrow!

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Posted

I'm so sorry, Friend! I am rather new to gradcafé but I saw your story on my little sidebar and I couldn't ignore it. I really hope your school agrees to the deferral; I think you're making a good and responsible decision. I wish you all the best. Good luck.

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Posted

I am sorry! I hope everything goes well with your lumpectomy and that the school allows you your deferral! All my best wishes go to you! Good luck!

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Posted

I'm so sorry to hear this very sad news. I hope that the cancer has been caught at a very early stage and has not spread yet. Stay strong. I hope you'll be granted a deferral from the graduate school. My thoughts are with you and I'm wishing you all the best.

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Posted

I'm so sorry. I really hope your school lets you defer and hopefully you'll be healthy by fall 2012. Good luck. My thoughts are with you.

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Posted

Sorry to hear that medieval, especially after what you have been through. I hope your school can defer both your admission and funding :(.

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Posted

My thoughts are you with you. I hope your deferral is smooth, along with your treatment.

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Posted

Oh my god... I don't know you, but I read your last blog entry and I thought: damn! I was so sorry to hear this. And today I read the headline of your latest blog entry (this one) and I was saying out loud "oh no, she doesn't deserve this!". I'm not good at comforting people - not even in my first language. But rest assured that I am very sorry and that I wish you all the best, good luck, lots of strength to battle this disease. My grandma and my aunt had it and they both are real fighters and they kicked the cancer's ass. So never, never NEVER give up, stay strong and positive and fight this sucker! (Sorry for these expressions; it's a very emotional day for me and also a very emotional topic)...

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Posted

The very very best to you! Be strong and I hope you get all the moral support from your family and friends. You can beat it!!!

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Posted

I am so, so sorry to hear about this. I had cancer in graduate school as well and understand how hard of a process this is. I took time off to undergo chemotherapy and radiation. If you ever need someone to chat with about cancer in graduate school, I'm happy to listen or to help as much as I can. Message me anytime! Good luck with everything!

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Posted

be strong my dear. we are all here to support you. Never give up you are a fighter.

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Posted

I am sorry for this. I hope it will not be a big problem for you and you'll be back on your grad track soon. My prayers are for you.

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Posted

be strong! we await your recovery!

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