wednesday

OK, well, I called the other university and asked to switch, and they let me back in! Now I'm not looking back.

Your post actually cheered me up a little because I feel almost the same way about my decision (constant horrible, horrible sick feeling in my gut that won't go away, waking up and panicking a little each morning when I wake up, not able to concentrate on other things, oscillating back and forth with convincing myself I made the right decision vs. knowing I've screwed my career, etc. It's like an unending feeling of being eaten up inside interspersed with glimmers of hope. I posted about it here: viewtopic.php?f=29&t=17873 ). It's kind of funny though because although our situations are not identical, I went with the equivalent of your School B and deeply regret it. I chose to continue working in my current interests, even though in the long term I think I would have been much better served by my School A which is just another more practical side of my interests. I take some solace in the chance to transfer or start over at another school, but I do not know enough about how this process works. I just want to stop worrying about my decision, and move on. But I am terrified that my regret will affect my commitment to my choice school. I was extremely close to contacting the school I declined, but haven't because I am pretty sure the position will be gone and don't think that would be a good start. The worst part is that we did this to ourselves so it's easy to beat ourselves up about it. I honestly think you made the right decision from your descriptions of the schools. Does anyone know how hard it is to transfer, especially to a higher-ranked/better program? If I really know that I made the wrong decision, would I be better off sticking with it anyway and plan on transferring after a year or masters degree, or should I just work for a little and reapply? I think you can always delay a year, but I will really love working at my choice school and hate to give that up, even though I don't think it will get me where I want to be career-wise.

I'm not sure that I made the right decision in choosing between different offers. Unfortunately I sent in my acceptance and denials on april 15, so there is probably not much I can do about it. I would just let it go, but I feel physically sick with remorse and am having trouble concentrating on anything else. I was choosing between two different approaches to my interests, and now that I chose, I just lost all interest in those approaches because I don't think they are very marketable. Without going into detail on pros/cons of each school, I am just wondering what my realistic options are. It's been about a week since I accepted/declined. I know it would look bad to ask the school I declined for a second chance, and it would not be fun asking to get out of the school I accepted. At this point, it is likely that the school I declined has admitted someone else for that position. But my gut is screaming at me that I made the wrong choice, and I might forever regret not even asking for a second chance. The other option I see is to continue with my original choice, and see how it goes. The problem is I realized that I will probably have a very hard time finding an academic position coming from this school, and even though they are doing the research I thought I wanted to do, it seems sort of isolated and not conducive to getting hired. How difficult/impossible/frowned upon is it to transfer schools after starting in a PhD program? It is very likely that I will really fit in and enjoy the research and people at this school, which is why I picked it. But I am having crippling second thoughts on my life after graduating from here. I just can't believe I turned down one of the offers, and it's eating me up that I may have made the wrong choice. What I'm really asking is, would it be better to ask the school I declined for a second chance, with a small probability that I can still attend (albeit with my flip-flopping hanging over me), OR should I stick it out and consider transferring if the school I picked is as really as isolated as I am feeling now? Sticking it out would give me the chance to further explore my interests, and have a better idea of exactly what I want to work on and how. I am thinking I could try it out for a year or even through the masters, and if I really hate it then I can try transferring/applying to other schools more aligned with my career goals. How feasible is this? Thanks.