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MarineBluePsy

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MarineBluePsy last won the day on December 27 2016

MarineBluePsy had the most liked content!

About MarineBluePsy

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    Macchiato

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    Female
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    Ummm...here....I think
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    Other than Psychology? Food, art, music, movies, fitness, and more.
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    Already Attending
  • Program
    Clinical Psychology

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  1. I think it might depend on whether you want clinical or research training abroad. Research might be a little easier if you are already working with faculty who have international contacts or are open to establishing some. Otherwise the study abroad department of your university could potentially connect you via their network of universities. With clinical work you'd want to be sure that the assessment and therapy skills you acquire will be accepted by your program toward your degree, otherwise it may not be worthwhile. Depending on the country you want to go to there might be post doc opportunities that will count toward getting a license in North America.
  2. I did exactly this, started my PhD in my mid-30s as a single childless woman in a cohort where most other students are about a decade younger. What helped me the most was going in knowing that my cohort or even my department wouldn't meet all of my social needs. I do sometimes socialize with my cohort because they are nice people and can actually be fun, but after spending so many hours with them each week I really don't desire to hang with them all the time outside of that. I figured being at a large public university I'd be able to connect with grad students in other departments that might be older, so I gave that a whirl. Unfortunately most of the people I came across were still either much younger or just living a completely different life being married with kids. I then chose to take my social life completely off campus and am happy I did. I signed up for every things to do in this city list I could find, picked up all the free local papers, volunteered, and joined meetup groups to force myself to attend a few things each week whether I felt like it or not. I did things I knew I like, tried things I'd never heard of, and gave things I previously felt hohum about another shot. I wouldn't say I have close friends yet and that's ok. But I do have people that when I see them out I can hang with them and it isn't weird or we can and do text each other to exchange invites. The best part is most of the people I've met are not in school so I'm not constantly sucked into school stuff. After having been in the working world I definitely appreciate the variety in my social life and don't want to feel like I can't ever get a break from school. I also head out of town during school breaks to visit family and friends I haven't seen awhile because there is nothing like being surrounded by people who know you well. As for dating, this too I've taken completely off campus because I just don't want that kind of drama in what I consider my workplace. Depending on the type of person (LGBT, other race/ethnicity, specific religion, etc) you wish to date there may be limited choices based on the region of the world your program is in. Also if you wish to date someone your age or older they may have assumptions about grad students that make dating harder such as you must have bad finances, you'll struggle to get a job when you graduate, your degree will take 10 years, you lack direction or something is wrong with you if you're this old and doing this, you don't have time to date, etc. I personally just mention the general industry I'm in until it seems like I may want to get to know a guy better, then he can have more specific details. Otherwise its just like dating when you work full time. Sometimes its fun and other times it really sucks lol.
  3. @anon143 At the start of my first year I didn't register for classes until August and it was perfectly fine lol. Even if a class was technically full my advisor had the ability to make it work because apparently there is a form for everything and first years are usually given some flexibility because they have no idea what they're supposed to be doing. And I do understand your fiance's thoughts on renting vs owning, but he has to be willing to make some compromises if he wants to be with his wife after the wedding. I know there's all kinds of modern twists on marriage, but I don't get the sense that you 2 actually want to live apart. Plus you 2 will have to deal with this issue again when you apply for internships (and maybe post doc and your job after that) because limiting yourself geographically can make it harder to be placed. There are lots of threads on this forum about going through this process with a spouse that might help you begin some discussions with him about what grad school is like. Now this year up until the wedding if living apart makes the most sense then there is nothing wrong with that, however you're saying your only option is to deal with a long commute when it isn't. You can't change what your fiance chooses to do, but you can change your situation anyway you want. You could look into renting a place (solo or shared) closer to campus and reduce your commute, your University might have grad student housing that is nice and affordable, or you might be able to find a commuter room closer where you just rent it during the week and go back to your parents place on weekends. Regardless of what you decide, be certain that it is truly what is best for you and you're not just settling for an awful situation because you feel obligated to.
  4. Wow. Ok so I have a few thoughts here, hopefully I can express them in an organized fashion. First your fiance........ I understand deciding against buying an overpriced house especially when it is unclear how long the market will be stable, but telling you that commuting over an hour to school while living apart is "totally doable" is not a generous offer. You don't need to discuss all the details of your relationship, but if you 2 are open to living together prior to the wedding then it seems odd that he wouldn't be interested in renting a place with you that reduces the commute burden (potentially for both of you). If he's willing to help you with expenses then it seems like living together is an easier way to do that especially if you're getting married next year. Commuting to school........ I commuted over an hour for my unfunded Master's program and it worked out well. I was able to keep my job and health benefits while adjusting my work schedule so that I could time my drive so I didn't sit in traffic. However, all of those hours on the road were still lost and the extra wear on my car lead to increased maintenance costs. Now that I'm in a PhD program I realized immediately that a commute that far would not work with all of the skills and training I wanted to gain. There are students in my program who live 30+ minutes away (by freeway) and the hassle is evident on their faces. Sometimes traffic and/or parking is horrendous so they're late. Sometimes they have to drive to campus for only their lab meeting that ends after 15 minutes or for one client who no shows. Or something gets left at home or on campus and another trip has to be made. Other times they have to be in the lab late or see clients late and if their day has already been 10+ hours long a lengthy drive on top of that sucks and could be dangerous. If their car breaks down and there's no public transit where they live then they're screwed. You don't have to live in walking distance of campus, but it is advantageous to be within 10-15 minutes on city streets or have the option of taking public transit quickly. This is precisely my situation now and its fabulous. I have more time for studying, seeing clients on or offsite, and lab work. I don't have to get up very early if I don't want to and even after long days on campus I don't get home so late that I'm too tired to do anything else. Living at home....... I too am an older student and the best decision I made was spending a little bit more to live all by myself in a bigger place. This way I have a whole room that is an office with plenty of room to brainstorm, cartwheel, or lay on the floor and vent Mindy Lahiri style. If your parents are familiar with the life of a grad student and a dedicated quiet space can be created for you then that might be different. But if that isn't an option and their place is too far then do not do this to yourself. If you and your fiance find a way to live together I highly suggest making sure the place can accommodate your having a dedicated office. Being able to shut the door on all your school stuff will give you a sense of separation when you take breaks and allow you to immerse yourself in a task while he's home doing something else. Sticking with your chosen program....... Ultimately this is going to be your call. I think your current advisors make a good point that it is very difficult to get into any program with some funding, especially a neuropsych program. If the faculty you'll have access to are well known in their field and their former students have gone on to successful careers then that is definitely something to keep in mind. You say the funding package isn't great, but is doable. You don't have to provide details, but really think about what that means. Does doable mean only with your fiance's help? If so that's a big risk if something were to happen with your relationship or his financial situation. Does doable mean with a few student loans? If you're still eligible for the federal ones then this isn't a terrible option in my opinion. If doable means sacrificing your health or safety in some way then its not worth it. Also think about how challenging application cycles are. You got into a program for this season, but if you reapply next year that doesn't mean you will. Programs able to take (and fund) students change, advisors may seek a different fit, other applicants may stand out more than you, and my understanding is professors talk and may find it odd that you rejected a perfectly good offer. Or you might get several offers and still be unhappy with the funding. So maybe a good way to look at it is if you reject your current offer and reapply next year, will you be willing to reapply the following year if for some reason you don't get in or find your funded offers lacking?
  5. Only the living stipend portion of my fellowship was taxable as regular income and I received the appropriate tax documents to file from my school. I didn't have any challenges filing and used a free online program which was mostly autopopulated because my information hasn't changed much year to year and the whole process took only a few minutes.
  6. I don't know that I have any great advice for you, but its awful that you're going through this. Some thoughts I do have......isn't threatening to evict you because you used law enforcements assistance for your child with a psychiatric illness some form of disabilities discrimination? I am not an expert on disability laws, but I don't think it would hurt for you to look into that. Your university should have an office that deals with disability issues that can either advise you or point you in the right direction to get better advice. Learning what your rights are is free and you may not even need to escalate things to the point of getting a lawyer. As for feeling unwelcome in your department, are you the only student with a family? Even though the faculty felt you were a great fit that doesn't mean they're accustomed to having a student with a family that may at times have to direct their attention elsewhere. Most universities have some type of support group for students with families that I'm told are amazing resources in dealing with not feeling welcome, balancing family and school, and even social options. Check with your graduate student association about something like that.
  7. I can't say if your career path is realistic without a doctorate, but I am wondering if you solicited any feedback from doctoral programs that rejected you. I know programs are very busy, but every once in awhile you can get some constructive criticism if you ask. From what you've said it doesn't seem your GPA was the problem, but there had to be something. Not a good personal statement? Lukewarm LORs? Not a good fit with the department? A gap in training/experience? I'm in a different field, but I too was rejected during more than one application cycle and found improving the areas I was told were weaker was helpful.
  8. I modified one from SquawkFox to meet my needs.
  9. You're not alone, I too am finishing my first year in my program and have realized I'm not in love with my program or its location. Since you can't transfer in grad school the way you can in undergrad and for me personally dropping out and reapplying isn't an option I'm going to stick it out and make the most of it. This is going to take just as much effort as it did to get into a program in the first place, but since I'm determined to have the career I want then its what I'll do. In terms of quality of life I am literally forcing myself out of the house and into the community to do something every week whether I feel like it or not. Yes I do mean don't spend all of your time on campus or with people from your department/lab. There's nothing wrong with them, but you don't want to get labeled as a downer that no one wants to be around or work with. In the community free events, site seeing, meetups, and short term volunteer opportunities are great places to start. I've attended plenty of things that I wasn't totally interested in or had no idea what they were and usually had a decent time or at least learned something. I also ask the locals what I should see and do while I'm here and add those things to my list. I will only be here for a few years, but when I leave I can truly say I experienced being here even if I didn't love it. If you're able to get out of town on the occasional weekend, during school breaks, or for a training opportunity somewhere else then do it. A change of scenery can refresh your batteries in many ways. Engaging in self care is also very important. Whatever your thing is....exercise, meditation, cooking, a hot bath, etc. it needs to be done regularly so that you have some balance.
  10. I don't think its completely out of left field, but you do need to be sure that you really want and need to do this. Just because you have an interest in something doesn't mean that the only way to pursue it is by going to graduate school, especially when you will already have a graduate degree. Before you decide anything I think it is important to figure out specifically what it is you want to do. Is there a psych department at your school? If so chat up those professors about the fields you're considering or see if they can connect you to colleagues. Then consider things like where these programs are/relocation, cost, overall career projections, etc.
  11. This is precisely the attitude I'm forcing myself to have about it instead of complaining about all the things that aren't working =) Now if the library would just hurry up and stock the books I want faster then I could really get my reading on.
  12. A few trips planned, some pleasure reading, attending more social events, trying new recipes, shamelessly watching The Bachelorette, and purging things that I no longer want/need/use.
  13. My program provides 12 months of funding and over the summer we're all expected to enroll in 6 units of classes and/or independent study, work in our research labs, and continue seeing clients. There isn't a formal rule for taking vacations, you just let your advisor know and make appropriate plans to get your work done and have a backup person for your clients. Some time their vacations with breaks between semesters or holidays and others go whenever.
  14. An A- is so exciting! Academically I ended up doing just fine overall which is a relief. I second the talks! I went to several talks throughout the year that were really informative, so I plan to incorporate more. I also stumbled upon several online, so keep your eyes peeled for those as well. Going forward I've decided to focus more on the few aspects of my program I can change (even if only slightly) to meet my needs and have the future (as in what I'll do when this is all over) in mind. I'm grateful to have others in my network that ended up in programs they weren't happy with so they've had some helpful tips for sticking it out since that is often the better option. Otherwise, like you, I'll be incorporating more wellness tools to keep me balanced and healthy.
  15. I think your notetaking strategy is going to depend on what you want or need the notes to do. Do you want the notes to function as a summary so that if you only read them then you'd understand the article? Are you required to turn in detailed summaries as a homework assignment? Either purpose will lead to notes taking longer to write. I found this style of note taking really helpful in undergrad because often professors tested on contents of the readings, key terms, etc. In grad school I have stopped using this style of note taking (unless I have the rare professor that requires summaries be turned in) because I don't find it helpful and its time consuming. Most of my grad classes haven't incorporated tests so the readings are strictly used for discussion purposes or as references for a paper I'm doing. So when I read an article for a class discussion I tend to just underline key points within the abstract, methods, and results because there is no sense in rewriting something that was already written. Then in the margins I write questions or comments that may contribute to the discussion or expand my own learning. For example, if a key term is not defined and I've never heard it then in the margin I'll write what does *insert key term* mean? Another example, if I disagree with the methods used in a study then in the margin I'll jot a brief note about why I disagree and what I would have done differently. If the article is going to be used for a paper then I still skip writing my own detailed summary because the key points I underline can be paraphrased when I am actually writing a draft. In addition to writing questions or comments I have in the margins I will make a note of where in the paper that tidbit might go. For example, if I find national statistics I want to use then in the margin I'll make a note to put that in the literature review or if I find a table/graph/chart to use I'll make a note that it would go in the appendix.