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GoOutside

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  1. I'm about to finish my first semester in a biology PhD program. I'm at a highly ranked program at a private university that is mostly focused on medical biology, though my background and research interests are in ecology and evolution. I expected to be one of very few EEB-minded people here, but upon arriving I have found that "few" really means one other grad student (who hates it here and is trying to graduate as soon as possible) and one PI. I thought the PI and I were a good match prior to coming here, but after rotating in their lab, I think it would be a mistake for me to join it. This leaves me pretty much stranded without any EEB research options, connections, relevant visiting speakers, etc. Instead, I am force-fed cell and molecular biology, which I hugely dislike. I also had concerns about the completely non-collegial atmosphere before coming here, and they have been completely confirmed. I like my cohort, but everyone in the department seems to treat this place like a job, and people don't really socialize. There are also too many Republicans (said a little bit tongue-in-cheek, but it's real and does make me uncomfortable). I am stuck at a lab bench and have no opportunities for field work (the one EEB PI had made it seem during the interview like a collaboration with a lab at another university would allow me to do international field work. When I met with that lab's PI, that quickly proved to not be a viable option). Contrast to the other program I seriously considered. It's a public university with a stand alone EEB department that is well-respected in the area of research I wanted to join, but otherwise not ranked nearly as high (top ~50 instead of top ~20). When I interviewed, I felt immediately at home. I liked a great many of the professors and their research topics. The PI whose lab I would have joined and I got along extremely well and seems to be the exact kind of PI I need. I would have been guaranteed to be doing international field work on a topic that excites me to no end. The students were philosophically like-minded, tight-knit, and supportive of each other. I wanted to go there so badly. I chose my current institution because of the money. The base stipend is roughly 10k higher than the one at the public institution, and I was awarded a fellowship on top of that, worth another 10k per year. I'm legitimately making post-doc level money right now, and roughly twice what I would've gotten at the public university. I would have to TA far more semesters at the public university (I like teaching, so the main detractor here is the time commitment out of lab). I am unbearably discontent with my program, though, and the public university stipend, while much, much smaller, is livable. I regret my decision immensely, and I'm not very happy here. This is notable, since I am typically a highly flexible and optimistic person. I'm considering three things: 1) Treat this like a job, study something that really does not excite me, somehow actually finish my PhD and go to a postdoc position that is more in my wheelhouse. 2) Treat this like a job for a few years and leave with a M.S. if it doesn't get any better. Figure out if I want to do a PhD elsewhere after that, or leave academia and get a job doing field science somewhere. 3) Try to transfer to the public university. Fwiw, I have wanted for a long time to ultimately be a professor, probably doing research. I am open to other paths. My first semester grades will likely be straight B's and my first rotation was not very productive, but I think I could get at least one decent letter of recommendation from someone here, but that would mean exposing the fact that I'm considering leaving. The public university program application deadline to be fully considered for funding and the interview was this past week. The final deadline is at the end of the month. I know that neither student who interviewed for that lab joined last year and two students graduated last year, so they need grad students. Should I contact the professor there who I want(ed) to work with? Should I do that ASAP, or can I wait until I know for certain that no other labs here are a good fit? I'm currently trying out a neuro lab, which is going OK - I have no neuro background, but could maybe get into it. Should I expect to have to submit a new application to the public university? How do I do this without making enemies? Any and all advice greatly appreciated.
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