angst

Absolutely. I definitely need cover all those bases.

City College, I believe. I heard from them last night.

Thanks Rose1128 and almondicecream for the advice and input! Appreciate it. To respond to your analyses, I think part of the problem is that not only have I completely finished interviewing--and I now just have to wait for a few more decisions--but also the pending offer I have from that POI wound up coming with great funding (tuition remission plus stipend). So I don't really have a great argument for postponing my decision that doesn't make it sound like I'm simply not as interested as I could be in their program--or at least it feels that way to me. Unless I were to say that I'm waiting to hear if I'm offered a higher, more livable stipend elsewhere, I can only really say that I want to ensure that I'm definitely making the right choice and don't want to rush a decision of this magnitude--which is true. And which I agree is completely defensible and valid, but I worry that will be received poorly, i.e., the POI will think "if you aren't jumping at this great offer, we're clearly not your top choice." (Though I also agree that I'd want to work with someone who gets it...) And then I wonder if it's true that I could damage the relationship, and suffer from that strain, if I wind up enrolling... Part of the issue is I received that offer weeks before I could have possibly heard back from anywhere else, which, while I'm grateful for that offer, hasn't given me the time/opportunity to hear other offers and speak more candidly with students at other programs, get a deeper understanding of other programs, etc.

The POI at a school that offered me admission has been subtly/implicitly pressuring me to respond definitively to the offer, and, given the signals that I've been receiving, I fear that the pressure will dial up in the next couple weeks. However, I have yet to hear back from most other programs I interviewed at--it's my only offer--so I don't even know yet what my other options may be. While I do feel that the program for which I have a pending offer--let's say Program A--would be a great opportunity on many levels, there is another program--Program B--that felt more like home to me, more like a place that really aligned with my sensibilities and personality. In a sense, it is that perennial conflict between my gut, which has been nagging me that I may be maximally fulfilled and animated by Program B, and logic/pragmatism, which concludes that on balance the benefits (e.g., fit with research interests, prestigious research lab, career flexibility afforded due to both strong research and rigorous clinical training) of Program A outweigh the costs (e.g., poorer fit with the vibe/surrounding environment/location, less interesting and diverse course offerings, diminished ability to engage with research outside the scope of my current interests). I should add that this comparison is complicated by the fact Program A is mentor-based whereas Program B is not. I'm having a pretty hard time trying to figure out what I value most--and I don't know how to assess whether that feeling of belonging/alignment will ultimately yield more for me than more pragmatic factors like number of publications or professional connections or whatever. It's obviously especially difficult when--and a bit ridiculous given--that I don't even know if I'm going to be offered admission to Program B, and haven't had the opportunity to flesh out that program fully. Anyways, I've heard from people that, despite our right to wait till April 15th to respond, I could potentially impair the relationship with the POI from Program A if I withhold an answer for too long. Does anyone know if that's true or have any advice about how to handle this situation (or evaluate my different inclinations ha...)??