tetrandra

I'm signing in for the first time in years and reviving this thread to say I had the exact same experience yesterday. I can't believe I passed my QE and have been in shock. I was so anxious and flailed throughout my entire exam, and now I can't seem to stop focusing on all the ways I got questions wrong. My committee was kind and fair, but I just couldn't handle a thing they were throwing at me, even the easy stuff. I've been considering asking my chair to rescind the pass because I don't think I deserved it. I thought passing would be a much different experience than this. I'm not glad that other people also have this experience but it has helped me to read that it happens.

Thanks so much you guys. I feel better about dropping now that I've slept on it, heard your advice, and reconsidered the real vs. imagined priorities. Even if I put a lot of strategic multi-tasking into projects, classwork will indeed eat into my ability to connect with key people and work that will really help me shape the thesis topic. I'm sure I would also be miserable...it's just not something I could handle. Reducing the amount of unnecessary pressure I'm putting on myself will be an ongoing learning exercise, I'm sure (is there a thread for that?). I hope I don't look like a flake by dropping the class. My required units are 12 (social science), and I'm going to stick with it now. Anyway, thanks again. This message board has helped me so much over the last few years with all these random anxieties that keep cropping up!

Hi, I'll try to make this brief. I'm a week into my program and I love being here. When I registered for 20 credit hours I knew it was only temporary. I wanted to safeguard against any last-minute cancellations or schedule conflicts. Now, I have it pared down to 17, which in my case is the required courseload plus two electives. I've always tended to pile on too much work and I've been trying to be mindful of what balances I need to maintain to make it through this long haul. But, I really want to take both of these classes and I don't like thinking about moving forward in this program without having these experiences right now. Also, I feel like a flake not being able to make up my mind. Everyone around me says I should drop a class, and in theory I agree. No one else is taking more than the required number of units and it's a lot of work. I just don't know how to feel good about dropping. I fear that there's not enough time to come up with a thesis topic, and I have a touch of the Impostor's Syndrome. I guess there are a few issues at play here that are complicating what is probably a simple action to take. Anyway, please don't tear me apart on this! I already feel like an idiot! But, I would appreciate any wisdom on avoiding overcommitment and keeping your head together during the transition in....thank you.

I moved from FL to Southern CA in 2008 and when preparing to move I found that U-Haul was much too expensive for the trip (keep in mind the gas costs are often as expensive as the rental itself). I had a large 1-bedroom apartment in FL. I got rid of all my furniture which left me with about 25 boxes of varying sizes, 5 of them full of books. I shipped the books via USPS media mail. I shipped the rest of the boxes through Greyhound freight services. They basically put your belongings in the underside of the bus to go with the passenger bags. Like Amtrak they go by weight and I believe the price is comparable. All in all I paid about $700 to move everything cross-country (except for me...that was just a one-way plane ticket) but of course it would depend on what stuff you were moving. Had I used U-Haul the cost would have been about $1K, plus gas and lodging and food for a 4-day trip (easily another $1K). Also, I would have taken much more stuff than would fit in the tiny studio apartment I ended up renting. Moving is such a good opportunity to pare down! I'm preparing for another move--for more grad school--and while it's difficult to let go of so much stuff I'm looking forward to staring fresh with a clearer mind!

Hi Everyone, Never thought I'd be posting on this thread. Earlier this month I applied for a Plan B(ish) job in the vicinity of the only grad school I had hoped to attend. Feeling pretty down on myself, I'd assumed I wouldn't get a call-back about the job (was missing a qualification) or get into grad school (was waitlisted for the second time). On Wednesday I got a call-back about the job. So exciting--a job much more related to my training, and with a massive pay increase. I was surprised at how they seemed to like me, and we scheduled a phone interview for Monday. Second interview to follow in person if things are moving in a good direction. I started daydreaming about how awesome it would be to work there. Grad school wasn't in the cards...who needs it, right? On Friday I was accepted to grad school, with an email saying I needed to call admissions ASAP to discuss details, which I assume include the funding package. I was so ecstatic I could barely breathe, so I needed to put off calling. Wouldn't want them to rescind their offer over my inability to keep myself together for a simple phone call. This is a wonderful problem to have, but I'm not sure how to proceed. I imagine I'll feel as though I'm cheating on either the job or the school if I don't disclose what's going on. Shouldn't I just keep quiet about this so I can gather enough info to make the best decision? In a perfect world I could attend the program and work part-time, but I'm not sure if that's an option. Either way, I don't want to waste peoples' time by going through with interviews or visits but I also don't want to screw myself out of a good opportunity. This situation might be similar to what a lot of you are going through with deciding between programs. Sorry if a no-brainer solution is within reach here--my executive functioning seems to be compromised by the oxygen deprivation experienced while being over the mooooooooooon!! If you were me, how would you conduct yourself on Monday? Thanks in advance.

I'm really hoping for this... I was waitlisted rather late last year at my dream program, and later received the silent rejection (ouch). This year I got feedback from admissions, improved my app and reapplied. We were told that results would start going out in mid-February, but I just saw a waitlister on the results board. My mind is alternating between "They've already decided and don't have a reason to send out rejections immediately or at all, so be prepared for ultimate fail" and "I'm still in the running, they're narrowing it down and maybe even finding funding sources for me!" The back and forth gets to be excruciating! My S.O. disapproves of the time and energy I'm spending on this site, but I can't stay away! Constantly re-estimating my chances somehow makes me feel like I have control over my life. How silly. It feels good to know I'm not alone with this anxiety!

Thanks and best of luck to both of you!

Hi everyone, I'm a 2nd-time applicant to a PhD program in the social sciences. I was waitlisted last year at this program, and it is the only program that I would like to attend at this point--no safety schools for me! Yikes. Last year I nearly lost my mind with anxiety during the loooong wait. I'm doing my best to prevent that from happening this year (it helps that I'm much busier this time around), but I can't help my lame tendency every day to uselessly "calculate" my chances. I've searched the forums on this topic but have found little information: Does anyone have experience reapplying to a program after being waitlisted? Does anyone think that a previous waitlist status works in your favor? I imagine that it probably depends a lot on the current crop of applicants, but I've significantly improved my application through work experience and I've addressed the two comments I received from the admissions officer (contacted faculty, tailored my statement a bit to emphasize fit). I'd appreciate any feedback, cheerleading, or gradcafe equivalent of an anxiolytic. Happy waiting, everyone!

The advice others have given is great. My input re: dating in Gainesville is that the prospects are not so good. I lived there for three years in my late 20s, and for context info I was a rather busy/serious, non-traditional upperclass(wo)man. There just weren't many people in the same boat as me, not to mention the dating pool. The numbers just weren't there for much success (although admittedly some of it had to do with me personally, haha) and I often went out with people who didn't live locally. I had the option to continue on at UF for grad school, but the #3 reason I decided against it was because I wasn't meeting anyone. I ended up attending school in Los Angeles, dated a LOT, and had enough luck to find a non-Angelean who ended up becoming my husband. I'm really glad I didn't stay in FL, as it really would have been a big waste of relationship-building time--time which became much more valuable to me as I got older. YMMV, but I think that it's wise to consider different cities. It might be an adjustment but it sounds like having more dating possibilities is important to you. Good for you for knowing what you want. My two cents...good luck! Edited: Sorry, didn't realize this was a old & moldy question.

Point taken. Thanks, I see how it could be perceived that way. I truly don't mind teaching, but I feel like I'm screwed if for some reason they decide I would be a lousy fit for a TA position. It's quite possible they might, as my experience is nearly 100% research. Honestly, I'm afraid to ask how this could be handled when it comes time to give applicants the axe. I was hoping that if I discussed my intention to apply to a fellowship, they might see that I'm serious about funding my studies in one way or another. Maybe they'll like me! (sigh) Does this even matter? I might have already started down the path of "obsessing = control over situation," please stop me...

Hi All, I can't seem to find information on this topic. I've recently discussed my research interest with my POI. While I get a decently positive feeling about submitting my application (was waitlisted last year) I feel that my chances could be improved if I had more of a readymade funding source. The POI said that his research group is new and still raising funds, but I should still reapply and if accepted perhaps be offered a TA position instead of a position as a graduate researcher. I was thinking I could apply for an NIH predoctoral fellowship. There's one with my name written all over it, LOL! Really though, if I mentioned to admissions that I am serious about leveraging funds for my work, would that help my chances? If so, who do you think I should discuss this with? My options: 1. Talk to POI about fellowship application 2. Talk to admissions about fellowship application 3. Discuss fellowship application in statement of purpose 4. Some combination of above 5. Don't talk about it because it looks manipulative What do you think? I'd appreciate any feedback!

I'm an OT and recent USC graduate. USC is also very expensive, and I'm am specializing in the lowest paid OT sector which has been risky. Ultimately I went to USC (moved from U of FL) because they had more of an emphasis in mental health practice and I expected that being in such a big city opened up many more doors for me (it did). Though I'll be paying on my student loans until I'm 55, I feel that the connections I've made and the opportunities available here have been well worth the cost. If you end up having the choice between schools, I strongly recommend against sole consideration of national program rankings. It's important to learn more about the culture of the school and department (research/teaching emphasis, involvement with AOTA & state organizations, fieldwork and extracurricular opportunities, faculty/student ratio, classroom demands, you get the idea) before deciding. Even though it's a master's program, matching well with what the department offers will make life a lot easier--these programs are often quite demanding for most people, and if you aren't enjoying your time developing within the program overall it just isn't worth it. If it turns out that more than one program seems to mesh well with your aspirations, I would honestly go with the least expensive option. Hope this helps, and good luck!!

I'm feeling a bit crushed right now by the waiting-anxiety, and for your entertainment I will admit that I'm pretty close to using a crystal ball myself... I've had my tarot cards read over this whole situation (in October, pre-application submission), and I'm tempted to go and have it done again. I expect to hear back any day now. I'd have my astrological chart read too but that costs more money, and I'm on a grad student budget as is. I have been obsessively checking my email, gradcafe results page, and phone (apparently what I want is a phone call and not an email...please no email). I've also resorted to checking my online application to see if anything different shows up even though I've heard nothing about this school posting results online. I've been paying attention to all dreams I've had about attending the school and using contextual information to divine my future as a student in the Program of Choice. I ask my boyfriend over and over if he thinks I'll get in, all the while analyzing his responses for any changes in his wording or tone that might mean he knows something I don't. Believe me, I know how all of this sounds. In short, boy am I glad this forum is anonymous. I'm so embarrassed!

I started half-heartedly looking. I believe I'm too old to be living in places where I don't want to settle, and the bio clock is also ticking. I'm happy that I got my MA all squared away and that job prospects in my field are promising. I just feel like this application was my first/last shot at a PhD, but maybe I'll change my mind if it doesn't work out. I really should have applied to more schools and worked harder to raise my GRE ~100 points. I truly love research...I guess I could always freeze some eggs. LOL