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new here !please rate my essay..thank you:)


ANVITA

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"Some people protest the destruction of famous old buildings, saying that we are losing priceless cultural and historical landmarks. Others suggest that by replacing them, however, we are doing exactly what the builders of the originals did. In time, the new buildings themselves may be considered landmarks." our cultural history forms a major part of our present identity. They are our roots and without them we would be clueless and have no connection to our past. I believe that destruction of famous old buildings is preposterous and would result in us losing a priceless and historical symbols. People are so busy trying to deal with the quotidian conundrums of our lives that they don’t have enough time to appreciate the gift that is present let alone their past.in such a scenario our historical buildings form a link to our ancestors who have shaped our present. If this were not the case why would we even have the concept of wonders of the world. Take taj mahal for instance. It is an architectural marvel, a symbol of undying love representing ineffable grace and beauty of the Mughal era.in an age where the meaning of love is lost it gives hope and is inspires to be a better version of ourselves. taking down such a landmark would not only result in destruction of nexus that connects us to our past but would also result in stripping us of hope and timeless beauty. Another example is the great pyramids. These magnificent structures have been a source of enigma since time immemorial. They have helped decipher innumerate secrets of the Egyptian empire, secrets which are still used today .people travel great distances just to see the magnanimous engineering feat achieved by bare human hands with such efficacy that they still stand tall and proud even after millions of years. Do we have any right to destroy something which we cannot possibly replicate? I don’t think so. Yes we do have the write to leave our mark in the history of mankind but not at this cost. These landmarks are reflections of our culture and in tying times unites a nation by reminding them who they are and where they are from. In conclusion I feel these landmarks are not mere structures of brick and mortar, they are so much more. they represent timeless beauty , enigma and are living proof of what man can achieve without relying on the technology and complex machines but simply from a determined heart and mettlesome spirit .they are an inspiration to us ,to rise above the human herd and achieve something that would be a symbol a hope for centuries ahead.

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Well, this is more of a paragraph than an essay, but I'm going to offer some basic feedback on grammar. First, you have quotations in your opening sentences, but no sense of where this quote is from. Either this isn't a quote (it doesn't read like one), or you need to cite a source.  Second, in American English, you would want to have a "the" in front of a capitalized Taj Mahal. You make a similar error around the word nexus.

Further on, you have the pyramids as being a "source of enigma," which is problematic. An enigma is the thing itself, not the mystery created, so you want your language to reflect that. You've got a few comma issues, along with capitalization issues.

 

While you vocabulary here is impressive, I don't get the point. I wouldn't think that this would not be a passing paper in First Year Composition.

Edited by bhr
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