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Waiting Game--how do you deal with the waiting anxiety?


procedural memory

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Folks, after you sent out your applications, how do you deal with the waiting anxiety?

 

Starting from taking GRE, looking for programs of good fit, contacting possible PIs, writing statements, preparing required documents to finally submitting the applications, it must have been a long and time consuming process for many. It could be emotionally draining and mentally fatiguing!

 

Have any of you experienced burnout?

 

Now the applications are all out, what can you do to deal with the uncertainty?

 

Please share your tips on how to handle the waiting stress! 

 

 

 

 

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I was too busying worrying about graduating both times I applied. To be fair I only waited a week after I sent in my final app to hear about an acceptance. 

 

So my advice, get busy. Make friends. Don't talk about it with others. Just live life. 

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Keep busy, if you are in school or working just try to focus on that and make goals within that to keep you occupied.  Find something constructive to do (read a book, binge watch on netflix...ok not super constructive but a great time sink!), etc.  Hang out with friends.  the good news is with a lot of holidays around this time is you can be easily distracted and taking time off with family and friends.  

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Thanks, GeoDude and Peachypie! Great suggestions about making friends and setting up goals to stay focused!

 

For those who are still wondering how, I have a list of things that might be of consideration:

 

1. Get a pile of books and read them (if you can quiet your mind chatter while reading).

2. Left brain overloaded? Go dancing, do yoga, go hiking/go running, or adopt pets. If you already have pets, maybe adopt more.

3. Both left and right brains are overloaded? Practice meditation

4. None of the above work? All right, just be lazy. I bet that you can't stand doing nothing for a long period of time and eventually you will find something to do.

 

You are more than welcome to share your thoughts/suggestions to continue to extend the list!

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I like all of these suggestions. Especially since I can't remember the last time I read a book for fun.

So true. I used to read several books a week. I'd go through a book in a couple hours. Now, I can't even remember the last time I read a book that wasn't required for school. I should give that a try, because right now I am checking my e-mail obsessively every day even though I'm fully aware that I won't hear anything for a couple months. Waiting...ugh

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When I can't go out to meet with my friends I either read books or play computer games. When I read, even if the books is super awesome, I still find my mind wandering around. However when you play a game you need to be constanly focused either on movement, hiding or on a story and interaction so there really is no room for thinking about anything else. It's kinda creative, fun, relaxing and fantastic time consumer ;)

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I am applying in mid-December, my waiting game right now consists of waiting for POI emails... Some respond much quicker than others and I find myself checking my email every twenty minutes. Once my applications are submitted, I will feel a welcomed calmness until mid-February, and then I will once again be checking my email periodically. For my area of history, I need a reading level of German, so I will really work hard on acquiring a second language to pass the time, not that I am not already working on my German language skills...

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No matter how much i try to be calm and keep my self loaded with office work... i'm still facing waiting anxiety. The best solution for all this is that wishfully all the high ranked grad schools send out Accept/Reject to the applicants a bit more quickly.

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My suggestion is to simply prepare yourself emotionally and materially for the case of being rejected by all because considering the extreme competitiveness that's the most likely outcome. Make a plan to learn about this failure and try to understand it is not an utter failure as long as experiences are gained. Also decide on what to learn in the next year in order to become a better applicant for the next time.

Edited by Cpoco
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I think that staying positive is the best method. I do believe that there is something to be said about creating and sending positive energy into the world, that it will come back to you, be it karma or something else.

 

The stress comes from knowing the committee meets Friday to make initial decisions (top choice), I can't picture how I will be starting Friday knowing that it is possible my plans are made and decided for the next few years. It's exciting  

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My suggestion is to simply prepare yourself emotionally and materially for the case of being rejected by all because considering the extreme competitiveness that's the most likely outcome. Make a plan to learn about this failure and try to understand it is not an utter failure as long as experiences are gained. Also decide on what to learn in the next year in order to become a better applicant for the next time.

 

this x100000. 

 

I've been coaching my parents on the importance of FIT.

 

"Mom, it's not about who is BEST, it's about who is the best MATCH for the program, faculty, and their goals that year. Come February we have to drum that into our heads."

 

"Yes, dear, but you're such a hard worker I bet you'll get in everywhere."

 

sigh.

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I've been reading books related to the field I'm going into (social work). I also crochet, which keeps my hands and mind busy. The advice about preparing for rejection is really good- admittedly, I will be quite crushed if I don't get in, but I've thought about how I could make my application stronger next year. 

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I've been coaching my parents on the importance of FIT.

 

"Mom, it's not about who is BEST, it's about who is the best MATCH for the program, faculty, and their goals that year. Come February we have to drum that into our heads."

 

"Yes, dear, but you're such a hard worker I bet you'll get in everywhere."

 

sigh.

 

^ This. So supportive and so frustrating. 

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I think that staying positive is the best method. I do believe that there is something to be said about creating and sending positive energy into the world, that it will come back to you, be it karma or something else.

 

The stress comes from knowing the committee meets Friday to make initial decisions (top choice), I can't picture how I will be starting Friday knowing that it is possible my plans are made and decided for the next few years. It's exciting  

 

Yes, staying positive defintely.

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I'm too busy working at my hectic Toys "R" Us seasonal job to worry about applications for long. I'm making money, interacting with several good people, AND keeping my mind off graduate school application notifications :-)

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I went to Cuba for a week. It was great. 

 

Now just back to work, but my job is not exactly an anxiety reducer. I edit manuscripts for a living, so I'm by my computer nearly 24/7...and consequently, I'm on here too much and always tuned into my email.

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I don't know man, the waiting game is tearing me apart, especially now that I turned in my last PhD application yesterday.

 

Word to the wise: for the love of God, DO NOT re-read your writing sample or statement of purpose after you turn in your apps. All that will happen is that you'll find little minor issues you couldn't see before (for some reason or another), and you'll get a minor panic attack (when in reality it really won't make or break you).

 

The worse part is thinking back and wondering if you could have done something better, or if you could have done a/b/c if you had waited another day to review your app.

 

Ah well. What's done is done...best of luck to everyone!

Edited by HistoryMystery
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My day today consisted of an important experiment- 

Hypothesis: Investigating the inverse relationship between optimal tasting dipping sauce for tater tots and least soggy-ness

Prep time: 5 minutes- experimental design

5 minutes- deciding which sauces to try

25 minutes for the damn tater tots to cook

15 minutes to eat all tater tots with different sauces

20 minutes to write this post

 

Experimental design:

Sriacha

Chili garlic sauce

Jack daniels BBQ sauce

 

Results:

Sriacha, sweetest of the 3, made tater tots most soggy over all taste ranking 2/3

Chili garlic sauce, best flavor, least sogginess, over all taste ranking 1/3

BBQ sauce, its just damn BBQ sauce...sigh.... smoky flavoring though. overall taste ranking 3/3

 

OK thats how I deal with anxiety after submitting my applications.

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Luckily I had no time to watch the last season of Boardwalk Empire because of this punishing semester. So that should help. Same with listening to this "Serial" podcast that everyone is raving about.

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