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The advice you don't want to take but really should (trust me)


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Hello from a current SLP grad student,

I’ve been right where you are now (3 times actually). And there’s no pretty way to say it……it sucks. Waiting sucks so much. But what sucks even more than waiting is the feeling you get when you get on this page and compare yourself to strangers. Strangers! You are 100% comparing yourself to someone you don’t know. And this comparison is supposed to “help you feel better.” Yeah right. If anything, you check this page to see that acceptances have been sent out to a school you applied to and now that pit in your stomach has arrived. Or maybe you see someone applied to the same school as you and you want to know their stats. Knowing their stats will not give you that sense of satisfaction. Your applications are in. It is now out of your hands.

My advice? Get off this website. It’s so hard to do. But honestly what’s the point of stressing yourself out more when the situation is out of your hands? And as for comparisons go, the person with the higher gpa could have horrible recommendations but you don’t know that. And the person that has a low gpa and gre could have the best personal statement known to man, but you don’t know that. So stop comparing. This process is about you. And if you really want to get in and it doesn’t happen, try again. I did and now I’m living the dream. 

Now please don't come back here.

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Honestly? I am not comparing myself to any of these people. No offense to any of you, you're all great. And we're all in this together and that's why it's helpful. I'm not in college anymore. I mean I am but no one I talk to on a regular basis is waiting for decisions like this. No one fully understands the anxiety I feel than everyone else here. And that makes this place awesome.

im filling most of my anxiety with research about the cities the colleges are in. It's fun

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18 minutes ago, maurmaur said:

Honestly? I am not comparing myself to any of these people. No offense to any of you, you're all great. And we're all in this together and that's why it's helpful. I'm not in college anymore. I mean I am but no one I talk to on a regular basis is waiting for decisions like this. No one fully understands the anxiety I feel than everyone else here. And that makes this place awesome.

im filling most of my anxiety with research about the cities the colleges are in. It's fun

I agree 100%!! I'm an out of field applicant and took all my prereqs online. I have no one to talk to and go through this process with, which is why I like this site so much! I've realized early on not to stress about others stats on here because everyone really is just so different! 

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1 hour ago, Dreamtobeslp said:

Hello from a current SLP grad student,

I’ve been right where you are now (3 times actually). And there’s no pretty way to say it……it sucks. Waiting sucks so much. But what sucks even more than waiting is the feeling you get when you get on this page and compare yourself to strangers. Strangers! You are 100% comparing yourself to someone you don’t know. And this comparison is supposed to “help you feel better.” Yeah right. If anything, you check this page to see that acceptances have been sent out to a school you applied to and now that pit in your stomach has arrived. Or maybe you see someone applied to the same school as you and you want to know their stats. Knowing their stats will not give you that sense of satisfaction. Your applications are in. It is now out of your hands.

 

My advice? Get off this website. It’s so hard to do. But honestly what’s the point of stressing yourself out more when the situation is out of your hands? And as for comparisons go, the person with the higher gpa could have horrible recommendations but you don’t know that. And the person that has a low gpa and gre could have the best personal statement known to man, but you don’t know that. So stop comparing. This process is about you. And if you really want to get in and it doesn’t happen, try again. I did and now I’m living the dream. 

 

 

Now please don't come back here.

 

I find this post hilarious lol. Only because I totally get why you wrote it and have seen so many other people with the same sentiments regarding this site. Some people may totally agree with you and may even take your advice. Others like me who understand, but don't agree since we have a different/more positive perspective about the GradCafe experience will definitely continue to seek the helpful advice and information shared here. But hey, some people may have needed your post so I'm all for you sharing your side of it. People should definitely steer clear from comparing stats. What I have found is that seeing others with similar subpar stats does give me hope when I see they have been accepted into a speech program (especially to one that I've applied to). This site, although at first contributing a bit to my worry, has quickly become an anxiety-reducer since I have more information here in regards to when people start hearing back and what kind of questions to expect for SLP program interviews than is available anywhere else. So I'm definitely grateful for this site because I'd be left in the dark about a lot of things otherwise. Plus, it's cool to connect with others going through the same things you are. I know people have even made Facebook groups to connect during the graduate school year. But yeah, different strokes as they say. Congrats on "living the dream"! I'm hoping I will be accepted soon enough as well :) 

Edited by SpeechLaedy
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"Judge not lest ye be judged?"  Isn't that a thing written in a book or something supposedly spoken by someone important at one time?  I'm not sure, but I don't think the judgment helps.  I appreciate the effort at advice.  It seems as if it is coming from a kind place.  The anxiety at this time can be debilitating, with or without a community to vent to.  We are all here to meet some sort of socio-emotional needs.  Each person has their own particular reasons, with their own particular backgrounds.  Comparison may be there.  Community is a possibility as well.  Knowledge and discussion on how to prepare for interviews is helpful, or even how to pay for potential grad schools.  There is such a vast variety of reasons to hang around this website.  The important thing is that we are capable of choosing our own actions and dealing with the consequences appropriately.  Doing so is all right.  For whatever reason we are here, we are.  If it's detrimental to our mental health in the long run, I hope to be able to grow some from the experience.  Congratulations on moving along to grad school!  That's fantastic for you.  I hope to do the same.  I will sit right here and check this site daily though until I am accepted, and probably some after, because it helps me for whatever reasons it does.  Thank you for your well-intended advice.            

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29 minutes ago, SpeechLaedy said:

I find this post hilarious lol. Only because I totally get why you wrote it and have seen so many other people with the same sentiments regarding this site. Some people may totally agree with you and may even take your advice. Others like me who understand, but don't agree since we have a different/more positive perspective about the GradCafe experience will definitely continue to seek the helpful advice and information shared here. But hey, some people may have needed your post so I'm all for you sharing your side of it. People should definitely steer clear from comparing stats. What I have found is that seeing others with similar subpar stats does give me hope when I see they have been accepted into a speech program (especially to one that I've applied to). This site, although at first contributing a bit to my worry, has quickly become an anxiety-reducer since I have more information here in regards to when people start hearing back and what kind of questions to expect for SLP program interviews than is available anywhere else. So I'm definitely grateful for this site because I'd be left in the dark about a lot of things otherwise. Plus, it's cool to connect with others going through the same things you are. I know people have even made Facebook groups to connect during the graduate school year. But yeah, different strokes as they say. Congrats on "living the dream"! I'm hoping I will be accepted soon enough as well :) 

How I feel to a tee just wrote my response at work so I couldn't be as eloquent 

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4 minutes ago, maurmaur said:

How I feel to a tee just wrote my response at work so I couldn't be as eloquent 

Haha! Don't worry, your post was definitely eloquent enough ;)  And I actually have had off all week long thanks to working in a school :lol: so no sort of time constraints here lol 

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2 hours ago, Dreamtobeslp said:

Now please don't come back here.

Or, you know, stop comparing yourself to others in any platform (including real life),* because it's not like not visiting the gradcafe is magically going to stop you from doing that. And come back here and be contributing board members that do things other than stress and freak out. That's much more fun all around, and what this board is really all about. 

* and when you stop doing these useless comparisons, stop comparing yourself both to internet strangers and (as importantly!) people you know. You never know the whole story, and it's nothing more than a good way to psych yourself out for no good reason. 

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