danielyamahoto

Dear fellow grad student community, I am in the process of writing my prospectus for a Ph.D. program in literature, but am having a lot of trouble synthesizing the three different literatures I am working with and finding a good framework for them. I keep feeling very stuck and am not sure how to think outside of the (or my) box. Is there any kind soul who might be willing to puzzle through this with me? I can attach the file here, or email it - alternatively, I can just give a brief description as a comment. Thank you SO much. Sincerely, Daniel

Thanks for the comment. I honestly do feel so relieved even just having read everyone's responses! Unfortunately my program is in a big school and I don't run into my colleagues very much and when we do, we're not comfortable enough to tell each other what's really on our minds - however, finding other people to talk to yesterday has been a great source of relief. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one. Good luck to you (and your colleagues) too!

Ahaha! Thank you! That DOES make me feel better. Worth the strugglebusing!

Dear fellow grad students, Apologies for this self-involved and very long post. Basically, I just passed my comprehensive exams in a top PhD program in Comparative Literature in the U.S. The process was exhausting; I went straight from my first year of teaching to cramming for exams during the summer. By the end of this, I was crying every day and regularly having panic attacks - I had never been so stressed out in my life. Now that I've finished my exams, my department is asking for a draft of my prospectus (only one month after my exams). I started trying to write it yesterday (I thought if I get it over with, I might have time to just relax), but I am just so exhausted and don't want to work anymore. Getting myself to work on the prospectus is making me miserable. I've spent hours just crying, because I feel I barely have an idea of what I'd like to write about - and, at the moment, I don't want to think about anything. Everything seems to come out confused, and I know my prospectus won't be great, seeing as I only have 10 days to work on it. I'm not sure if it's being exhausted/upset that is making me confused about what to write, or if it's being confused about what to write that is making me upset (and even more exhausted). It's a possibility to ask for more time, but I'm not sure I would get it - I'm also not sure it would make a difference, because I'm so exhausted that it would take at least a few months for me to get some form of energy back. Although I think that I can manage to continue working on my prospectus by just gritting my teeth and doing it, the general experience of teaching, taking my generals exams, and then having to crunch out this prospectus, which is causing me so many panic attacks, makes me question my decision to have gone to grad school in general. I worry that maybe it's difficult for me only because I'm not as brilliant as the other students, and that maybe it's just that I don't have the intellectual and emotional (and physical) stamina to continue pushing myself like this because I'm not smart enough. I seem to manage to have done fairly well in some classes and some aspects of the PhD program, but only because of an enormous effort, which always came at a great physical and emotional cost. Other students seem either to accept these costs (it seems many grad students don't care about their health) or somehow have a stouter constitution. Anyway, I feel ashamed and worried that maybe I am not smart enough/hard-working enough, and also find it extremely difficult to continue doing any work. I'm just so exhausted. I will finish my Ph.D., but in the meantime am struggling with extreme unhappiness - both about my choice to go to grad school, my choice in topic, having to continue working constantly, and now my possible lack of career options once I finish. Additionally, I feel I'm not saying anything important and/or am not brilliant enough to say something important and meaningful about literature. I know that I can write something fairly decent but bullshitty and that it would be accepted, but that doesn't make me feel better - it makes me even more upset to think about how easy it is to get away with bullshit in my (top) literature program. I know that there are some students who may make brilliant and insightful arguments, but I worry that I am not one of them - even if I am, any worthwhile papers I write seem to require a lot of time and a monumental amount of effort, which I don't feel is possible to do on a regular and continued basis. I have considered dropping out but would literally have no idea what to do with myself - I think it's better to finish and then start looking for other career options. If I had any questions, they would probably be - should I possibly ask to have more time for the prospectus or get it over with? Are these panic/crying attacks normal for grad students? Has anyone ever felt this way before due to lack of energy? I honestly am not sure if I am disillusioned with the whole Ph.D. process or am just very exhausted. I worry that maybe I am somehow just lazy and a person whose constitution is just not made out for intensive work (then I worry as well about what my career options would be like - what if I'm just lazy!?) I would love to talk to someone who could possibly talk me through this, but don't have any other grad students or professors I would feel comfortable confiding in. I just feel desperate, useless, stupid, lazy, scared, and exhausted. Any advice, suggestions, or commiserations are so appreciated. Thank you.

Thanks! I have already included it in all my other applications, but suddenly I was thinking about it and became unsure. Don't know what came over me! I'm sure that committees like to read short papers, but for comparative literature, I believe they would be more impressed with the full 15 pages.

hello, I know this is a HUGE favor to ask, but I simply don't know who else to ask. I have already asked my prfoessors for 20 letters of recommendation letters, and they are so busy that I do not want to ask if they can read my 15-page writing sample. If anyone is willing to volunteer, I would really appreciate it. If anyone is willing to look at it for $$$$$, I am even willing to pay--that's how desperate I am. I fear my writing sample is simply not up to par for a PhD Comparative Lit program. Email me at kittykatherina@yahoo.com with your email if you are willing. I will love you--whoever you are--forever!

Hello, I am applying to mostly top PhD comparative literature programs, but I am almost certain I will be rejected by every single one, and am quickly becoming discouraged as I am working on my applications. I have a bit of a unique situation: I graduated from a bottom-tier school, CSULA. I have a 3.745 overall GPA and my English Major GPA is 3.85. I do not have ANY publications or any research projects I worked on. My two outstanding qualities are that I already have my Bachelor's Degree at the age of 18, and also that I am an accomplished pianist. (I am focusing on the intersections between music and literature, so it is relevant). However, I'm just not sure how far being 18 will get me. How much will a complete lack of experience impede me, in addition to going to a school of "laughable quality," as other people frequently say? My GRE verbal score was 710. Quantitative was 560 (does it matter?) Analytical: 5.5 I was on debate team, the honors club, in phi kappa phi, am tutoring english at my university's writing center and even taught English 100 at my university. I also teach piano privately, won several scholarships and competitions (but only in piano), and did administrative work at a law firm. My personal statement is very strong, I think, but I don't know about my writing sample. (I don't know anyone who can give me feedback, sadly...). As for language skills, I speak Russian fluently, and have completed the first quarter of Advanced French, so I can read/write at a moderate level. What are my chances? I am applying to 18 schools, all of them top schools like U of Chicago, Brown, WUSTL, U of Wisconsin-Madison, Nc Chapel Hill, Yale, Cornell, Duke, Indiana, UCLA,.

Hello, the requirement for my writing sample is 15 pages, and no more than 15. I honestly don't know--does that mean including Works Cited pages or not? It's for comparative literature programs. If I include Works Cited, is it ok? Thanks a lot.

Yes, I just finished my BA in English. I only mentioned it because I was wondering if maybe it could offset my somewhat mediocre scores in the eyes of admissions. Nowadays, a lot of kids go to college early, especially in California, so I feel it doesn't even give me that much edge.

Hello, I took the GRE yesterday and I received a 710 verbal, and 560 in quantitative. I don't know my AWA scores yet, but I'm hoping/expecting at least 5. I am applying to graduate programs in comparative literature, and I am looking at schools like NC Chapel Hill, USC, UCLA, Columbia (maybe a bit of a reach), WUSTL, and NYU. Are my scores competitive, or should I retake the GRE test? Thank you, very worried. Oops, I posted this twice--sorry! I'm new to this forum and I can't figure out how to delete this post. I thought that the first time, I had posted in a different forum. My apologies.