Two weeks ago I was rejected from the University of Toronto. Thankfully their letter was not snarky or mean, but it was short and I feel like I wasted too much of my time impatiently waiting - not to mention the couple hundred dollars I spent to apply and to have a copy of my transcripts sent.
I wasn't too discouraged when I first received the rejection, it wasn't my top choice of school and I had a conditional acceptance elsewhere. But, as time passed, I soon became more and more worried about my situation come the fall. The rejection slowly ate away at my self confidence concerning my acceptance at City University London, especially since I had that panic a few weeks back.
From the realization I might not be going to grad school, to the blow of a rejection I have realized a couple of things.
I want this degree, and the career that comes with it more than anything. At first I was most excited about the prospect of moving to London, or Toronto, places that I have dreamed about moving to for years. I forgot that this was all about my education. After the scare of not going I remembered what it really was about. Education and then career. I'm not going into academia like many of the other people here, but in Canada a Master's degree is worth it's weight in Tuition.
Since I feared rejection from both schools so badly I began on my quest to learn the content I needed to succeed in the career of my choice, not an easy feat when you only possess about half the skills required (for those of you curious, I want to be a UX Designer/Researcher eventually becoming a freelance consultant in the field, something where I only possess the knowledge of Human Factors, and no design experience . . . about 50% of what I need to get a job). I could do it alone, but I'd rather go to school.
It has been a whirlwind of a month, to say the least, my emotions have been all over the place in regards to this grad school thing. Additionally I am dealing with the repercussions of graduating during an economic downturn. I haven't worked for 3 months now and my bank account is running on empty. Thankfully my parents were more than happy to have me move back into their home, even if I am stuck in the now spare bedroom (which used to belong to my sister) because my room has been transferred to someone else.
The situation has all culminated to this morning, when I got my long awaited UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE to City University London. The financial fears have long been dealt with, and I've already paid a deposit on a place to live so I needn't worry about that anymore either. AS of 12:30 today I began working on gathering my things for a Tier 4 VISA to the UK, and applying for OSAP (Ontario Student Assistance Program) once again - the fifth time in my life I've completed this task. The next couple of weeks are going to be filled with embassy and bank visits, and browsing the many websites which allow me to search for the cheapest possible flight to Heathrow. I'm feeling like a huge bundle of nerves from the excitement, and fear. But mostly I'm glad I don't have to keep trying to learn design on my own - I'll have a well versed professor helping me out in a couple of months.
Now, to start brainstorming on a dissertation topic.
Thank you to everyone who has followed along on this journey with me. I am so glad for all your kind words, and encouragement, as well as helpful advice and ideas for what I could do if I didn't make it in. This community is so wonderful and I am so glad to have found it to help me out.