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SoftMango123

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About SoftMango123

  • Rank
    Decaf
  • Birthday 10/21/1996

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  • Gender
    Man
  • Application Season
    2019 Fall

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  1. I've applied to UC Santa Barbara's PhD in Feminist Studies. Looking forward to hearing our decisions! *nervous*
  2. Hello! I've applied to both M.A. and Ph.D. programs straight from undergrad (see my sig). I had originally set my eyes on applying only to M.A. programs, but my advisors were shocked when I told them and they informed me that my goal should be to apply for Ph.D.'s and to only do an M.A. as a backup. I didn't know this was common within the humanities (my boyfriend is in the sciences so I am well aware of the "stigma" of getting a M.S. versus going straight to a Ph.D.). Then again, not many students are really "taught" the ins-and-outs of graduate degrees, so I can't be too shocked that I didn't "know" going to a Ph.D. should have been the default for me. Though I and all my advisors and mentors think my applications, experience, and written materials are superb, I'm not setting my hopes too high for the Ph.D. because I think I'd grow more and have more time to experiment with my research within an M.A. program. A few of my mentors "inside" the world of my research have even concluded that even if I did get into Ph.D. programs, I should strongly consider one specific M.A. pathway as it would allow me to network with specific faculty at a specific place within a very specific field, and that doing this would widen my social capital and benefit me later in my career... It's been weird, actually, because a lot of my advisors and mentors (I'm very, very lucky to have quite a lot of cheerleaders) have such different opinions about what I should do. Yet each one tells me to "follow my heart" at the end of the day!
  3. Hey FutureEdPHD! Thank you for telling me you found the post helpful! I'm sorry to hear about that stress. Hopefully you two find the little bits of downtime to talk about your stress, comfort each other, and really set your intentions with one another. I know it can seem super fast. You're actually at a later stage than me and my partner right now so I'm learning from what you've written, as we haven't even heard any admissions decisions from schools... it's so nerve-wracking, but you got this!
  4. Hi everyone! Long-time lurker trying to get into posting and making friends within this community. I'm wondering: Any drag friends, queer folk, and allies watching this season of RuPaul's Drag Race: All Stars? (Also, anyone else excited that the UK version of the show has been confirmed?) Whose team are you on? Who is th'ickning and who is busted? Discuss! Me: #TeamManila, followed by #TeamTrinity.
  5. My partner was rejected from all but two graduate programs three years ago (rejected from all Ph.D.'s, accepted to two M.S. programs). This is his second round applying after finishing his M.S., and my first round applying for MA/Ph.D. programs after finishing undergrad. Needless to say, it's incredibly stressful for both of us, but it helps knowing that we have each other's back and that we're there to support each other and offer laughs, rest, and comfort in all the ways that we can. We also make sure to support, affirm, compliment, praise, encourage, and listen to each other as any other healthy couple would. That's all I think you really can do for your significant other, really, and you sound like you're already being proactive and kind by reaching out to ask this forum for advice. I wouldn't suggest telling your partner that the rejections "aren't personal"—or actually, it really just depends on your dynamic, since me and my partner are pretty careful not to "explain" rejections to each other, just mutually bemoan each of our struggles and affirm together that they suck instead of saying something that might make the rejection sound less harmful when it really is, if that makes sense. Just a little communication lesson we've picked up. Here's an article from the Gottman Institute, a super hetero research institute lead by psychologists John and Jill Gottman, the nation's leading marriage researchers. My partner and I read their books and articles together and we love connecting over their relationship tools. Keep in mind that I'm not a psychologist so I don't know what the field's opinion on their research is—all I know is that reading through their stuff has definitely helped me and my partner's relationship! Hopefully I've helped. If you have any questions, please ask away!
  6. Hi, Although I'm doing finals and don't have the time to edit your statement and offer feedback (I'm sorry—I've helped others and it's usually time-consuming), I'd recommend you install Grammarly on your computer or make a free account online. You can copy and paste your essay there and it will make grammar suggestions. Best of luck! Grammarly is also an amazing tool in general for all writing. I don't know how I'd live without it!
  7. My understanding is that it honestly depends on the program. If you're not sure about the length, you can call the admissions person at the department and ask pretty innocuously. In my experience, they're generally helpful and get these questions often! (Though it can be scary to reach out that way). I was considering a Ph.D. program in Film and Media and called when I realized their website didn't specify a requirement. Surprisingly, the admissions officer said that the "length varies, but anywhere from three to five pages is enough." Other programs are much more strict about the page requirement. Hope that helps!
  8. Hi, Former sex worker turned incoming graduate student here. This is a super interesting topic. My research is about sex work and I've only applied to ethnic studies/feminist studies programs that will let me study it and that would view my experiences of sex work and poverty as actually augmenting my research. In fact, much of my personal history statements were about my experiences of sex work (not in any grossly revealing or self-fetishizing way—it was tricky to write my statements to be "personal" but not "unprofessional"), and how I've used that to drive in my work in student service and community organizing and my research. So I imagined I would never be kicked out if I were "outed" considering I've been public about it from the get-go (assuming I'm admitted to any of my programs in the first place, hehe! ***knocks on wood***). But I understand other people in non-humanities or non-compassionate fields or departments don't have my form of privilege... I hope it wouldn't be an issue, and I'm almost certain that if the student were to make a case that they turned to sex work out of financial emergency or poverty (as did I) then it would constitute discrimination to punish them for performing a labor that was necessary to their past survival. Awesome question. If you'd like to talk about this in person or private, PM me!
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