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nimsaj95

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  1. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from csun52 in First-Generation Grad Students Thread   
    My parents are both immigrants (from Cuba and Colombia) neither went to college, and have little understanding of what graduate school is. One example I always think of when I compare my parents educational upbringing versus my own, is that when my mom came to America at age 10, she was always pulled out of school to accompany her parents to doctors appointments to try and translate, although she was just learning English herself. There's always a sense of guilt for how easy I had it in comparison.
    My parents deserve to see "PhD" after our last name. Any other females against changing their last name if they get married for this reason?
  2. Like
    nimsaj95 reacted to ciistai in First-Generation Grad Students Thread   
    I got married and I haven't changed mine, for multiple reasons, but this is 100% one of them! My parents both graduated from high school but that's it. I'm a first gen - some cousins after me ended up going to college after I started, but no one has gone this far. It can be hard sometimes, and a bit alienating. Weird to have friends whose grandparents have PhDs while mine were farmers who couldn't read. I'm doing this for them! 
  3. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to Teaching Faculty Wannabe in Quiet/Shy/Socially Anxious in Academia   
    Also, one thing I realized: As a women of color in science and engineering, I felt this pressure to put myself out there more. I know this isn't that great of a feeling because I feel like I have to work harder than other students to get the same results, but I have noticed that it has made me more outspoken over time. During various internships, I've had to interact and collaborate with various people. Because I didn't want to look a like a slacker, I pushed my anxiety aside, put my foot down, and just talked to them about whatever I had to say (a problem with lab equipment, an idea on the project I was working on, etc). I do believe a lot of my feelings to challenge my social anxiety stem from being a minority. I just thought this was an interesting realization I had. I am not sure if anyone else can relate.
  4. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to Teaching Faculty Wannabe in Quiet/Shy/Socially Anxious in Academia   
    I have social anxiety, which has been seen as shy or timid by others. For the longest time, I thought I was shy and/or timid, and people viewed this as either me not liking them, or thinking I am better than me, or just a weirdo, I guess. It also doesn't help that I am an introvert. So not only do I not like talking in front of crowds or strangers, but I only really like talking to certain people and get tired easily when I have to interact with people for long periods of time.
    (1) In the past, when someone says this to me, I usually just smiled at them and shrugged it off externally. Internally, I was questioning why they told me that. Was it a good or bad thing that they told me that? Should I talk more? If so, then what do I talk about? It was a vicious cycle and I noticed that my brain still does that sometimes. Now, when someone points this out, I either say something like "I am an introverted person" or "I am not a very talkative person. I'd rather listen." Sometimes I'll  tell people I am comfortable relieving this information to that I have social anxiety and sometimes talking just FEELS TO HARD TO DO. People do sometimes find these responses weird, but at least I am telling them the truth and not hiding my feelings like I used to. You can't really control how people react, but it's better to be honest with them (to the extent you are comfortable with).
    (2) I am not a PhD student yet (I will be starting this fall), but whenever I had to present during my undergrad, it was really hard. Hours and days up to the time I had to present something (a PPT project to my class, senior design updates to my advisors, poster presentations, etc), I would get super nervous and anxious to the point where I wouldn't eat, I felt like I was going to get sick, and I couldn't breathe well. What usually helps with me during those times is many things. Drinking lots of water. The water at least keeps you hydrated and flushes some of the stress hormone from your body (Make sure to go to the bathroom beforehand though, haha). It also keeps your mouth ready to talk. I hate when I talk and I start smacking because my mouth is dry due to my nervousness. Sometimes walking outside and chewing gum helps. If I am presenting with group members I trust, I am fully honest with them about my anxiety and I have honestly been lucky in them supporting me and making sure I am okay before presenting. Additionally, you have to stay realistic. You might mess up a few times during your talk or presentation, but try to breathe, take a small few second break during the messed up part to recollect your thoughts, and continue on anything your brain grabs related to your topic. When I met my future research advisor at a school visit, I was honest with them about my social anxiety and wanting to improve my presentation skills. They were totally understanding and told me that they would help me learn how to control my stage fright and find ways I can present better. Sometimes you just have to challenge yourself. One of the scariest things I have ever done was give a speech at my departmental graduation. I was asked by my classmates to do it. I really wanted to say no, but doing it would show my anxiety who's boss. To this day, I can't watch the recording of it. I stumbled during a part of it, and even said that I was a very nervous person, but people ended up liking it in the end. I felt like they could understand my nervousness. It probably helped that I had few jokes  in it (that actually made people laugh, say what??).
    I am not sure all of these things are useful to everyone and I am definitely still figuring out how to cope with social anxiety and being introverted in academia. But being honest with yourself and those around you feels key or else people will assume things about you and you might start overthinking too much. Also, as shown through this forum, there are other people out there that are dealing with similar things as you. You are able to connect with others through these circumstances that feel like a flaw or disadvantage. Good luck and I look forward to what others say! Thanks for starting this!
  5. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from MindOverMatter in Quiet/Shy/Socially Anxious in Academia   
    I feel this. I also am not in grad school yet, but as a shy/quiet person, the thing that scares me the most is the broad task of "networking". This is obviously imperative in academia, and I've personally been told by a mentor academia may not be for me if I find it difficult to make connections and begin collaborations. 

    I don't have any answers. I think people pointing it out comes from a genuine place of trying to include someone who hasn't made their voice heard, but it is incredibly embarrassing and hurtful. Growing up, when I got singled out for being quiet (or worse, classmates finally realizing I was in their class at the end of the school year) I would get so angry and upset. At this point, I've realized it's okay to be this way and that I don't need to demand attention to feel worthy. 
    Hoping to get some tips from this thread too!
  6. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from Teaching Faculty Wannabe in Quiet/Shy/Socially Anxious in Academia   
    I feel this. I also am not in grad school yet, but as a shy/quiet person, the thing that scares me the most is the broad task of "networking". This is obviously imperative in academia, and I've personally been told by a mentor academia may not be for me if I find it difficult to make connections and begin collaborations. 

    I don't have any answers. I think people pointing it out comes from a genuine place of trying to include someone who hasn't made their voice heard, but it is incredibly embarrassing and hurtful. Growing up, when I got singled out for being quiet (or worse, classmates finally realizing I was in their class at the end of the school year) I would get so angry and upset. At this point, I've realized it's okay to be this way and that I don't need to demand attention to feel worthy. 
    Hoping to get some tips from this thread too!
  7. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from CafeteroJr in First-Generation Grad Students Thread   
    My parents are both immigrants (from Cuba and Colombia) neither went to college, and have little understanding of what graduate school is. One example I always think of when I compare my parents educational upbringing versus my own, is that when my mom came to America at age 10, she was always pulled out of school to accompany her parents to doctors appointments to try and translate, although she was just learning English herself. There's always a sense of guilt for how easy I had it in comparison.
    My parents deserve to see "PhD" after our last name. Any other females against changing their last name if they get married for this reason?
  8. Like
    nimsaj95 reacted to CafeteroJr in First-Generation Grad Students Thread   
    I would heart react all of your posts, but alas, GC decided that my love is a finite supply (which is a lie, because it's amazing people like you all that keep me grounded that anything is possible for me and deserve all the love and recognition you get!) So keep doing good shit y'all! ❤️ 
  9. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from jmaginary in State College, PA   
    You can also check out the Park Forest area. It's a nice residential area with some newer townhome complexes right by Best Buy, Walmart, Panera, etc. 
  10. Like
    nimsaj95 reacted to ssfgrad in Potential Laboratory Sabotage   
    I know, right!  My friends think I should write a book ?.  
    I received the grant btw, I walked right past the old lab to accept it. Sweet, sweet victory. Now, onto bigger and better things!  
  11. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to philopsych in I is stressed *Non-Judgmental Space for PhD Applicants*   
    On Friday, I reached out again to the school that  told me I'd get results two weeks ago (and I've seen people posting acceptances and rejections since then). They replied immediately and said I'd hear back early this week...so that has upped the stress. At this point, I just want to know what I'm going to be doing next year (whether it be school or an RA position). Where am I going to live?  Will my fiance find a job there?
  12. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to psychhealth101 in What are people's experiences being waitlisted?   
    I'm in the exact same position. It is very difficult waiting to hear back from a program when it's so unpredictable whether you will be offered a spot or not..especially when you have another great offer that is waiting for you to respond. PM me if you want to talk!
  13. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to DyingInside in Fall 2019 Psychology PhD Applicants!   
    It sounds like you are on the waitlist and he is waiting for another faculty's student to decline so that a spot can open up for him to take you.... check the developmental psych thread. A student posted there that they were accepted. 
  14. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to huskypsych in What are people's experiences being waitlisted?   
    Unfortunately, I don't believe that the Council of Graduate Schools resolution gives any deadline on programs to extend offers. We have to decide by April 15 (or risk losing the offer), but they can do whatever they want ?
  15. Like
    nimsaj95 reacted to GradPerson in I is stressed *Non-Judgmental Space for PhD Applicants*   
    Has anyone noticed themselves becoming more stressed about everything as application season goes on? I know it's almost over but I've gotten a lot more anxious about practically everything (even unrelated to grad school or school in general) and it seems to have started around late november ?
    Stress is unfun.
  16. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to letsgetclinicalclinical in Fellowship Oppurtunities for Phd Programs   
    Hi friends,
    I just wanted to start a thread on available fellowship opportunities for those in phd programs in any area of psych. 
    Please provide the following info:
    Fellowship Name:
    Program Type (if it’s specific to one area):
    Web Link: 
  17. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to paraent in Fall 2019 Psychology PhD Applicants!   
    grad programs need to be more open about the extra fellowships they offer, especially the ones for minorities;
    i should hear before i apply rather than after i get in that i'll get an extra $5k at this school for having background X; stuff like that greatly colors whether I'll think a particular program is financially worth it or not
  18. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from psych2315 in Post-Interview Anxieties, Worries, Thoughts, Comments, etc.   
    I emailed them with something along the lines of "I was hoping get some information regarding the status of my application. Any insight would be much appreciated as I begin to consider my options"

    I've seen a lot of mixed feelings about contacting a POI post-interview, but in my opinion I don't think it's inappropriate as long as you are polite and not pushy! Good luck!!
  19. Like
    nimsaj95 reacted to TheEternalGrad in Post-Interview Anxieties, Worries, Thoughts, Comments, etc.   
    I wouldn't panic about the foregoing a promising opportunity part. I did the same thing when I emailed my POI after an interview to thank him for his time. He added something about how he'd hope to see me in the fall but to also pick the program that best works for me. I ended up getting accepted! I think your POI is just trying to be considerate in case you get a better offer elsewhere. ? I wish I could offer advice about the outside funding (sort of in the same boat at the moment, so I'd love to hear some insight too). I hope the funding works out so you can get your acceptance!!!
  20. Like
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from yikespsych in Post-Interview Anxieties, Worries, Thoughts, Comments, etc.   
    Hi everyone, I recently reached out to a POI for my top choice post-interview, and his email was a little cryptic? He basically said funding for spots in my concentration is "in flux" and he would like to extend an offer to me should he get approval...but he also said he wouldn't want me to forego a promising opportunity elsewhere while we wait to find out. Not really sure how to read this...any insight? ALSO, I was unpleasantly shocked at the funding offered by my second choice (only acceptance), and don't think I'd be able to make that work. I know it's possible to apply for outside funding, but does anyone have any concrete information on this (what kind of sources, who is eligible, competitiveness?) Stressed!
  21. Upvote
    nimsaj95 reacted to clinical_psych_hopeful in Fall 2019 Clinical Psychology Applicants (PhD, PsyD)   
    I think 3 weeks is an appropriate amount of time to check in post-interview.  They should be able to give you some info by now.
  22. Upvote
    nimsaj95 got a reaction from qrock in Fall 2019 Clinical Psych Interview Invites   
    Has anyone heard anything from University of Arizona? I saw someone post they were rejected, but haven't seen anything else!
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