mmmmcoffee

And don't forget to also be 'nice' to yourself, give time off, etc. 
Happy to review materials for anyone

Same, I told myself I would register this weekend, lol- and we do start in just a couple weeks. It's going to be an interesting year!

Nah, you're response, although your opinion, was very undermining and judgmental. How are you gonna tell someone you don't know "You don't seem invested in the process." An ass hat statement.You were judging the individual and didn't really, in my opinion, try to give any real answer as to how the person can go about the way. I'm immature? If you say so. And yes I was very triggered at your responses, which was met with my "wall" that called you out. And again, you were obviously pressed or should I say, insecure, since you perceived the author to be full of his/herself based on her accomplishments and what she brings to the table, which again I don't know what you skipped over, but the person wrote some. Your statements, in my opinion, was condescending and judgmental and was met with a response. 
And again, your response didn't address how the author could go about writing it in their application AT ALL. Just your extra opinion on the matter was included, whether right or wrong. 

Wow, nice wall of text.
You're assuming a great deal. I am asking a real question: What does the author bring to the table? It's not an unreasonable question considering a valuable spot is on the line. How do you know they write well? Have you read their work? You may be right, but unless you have, you're making assumptions. 
I'm basing everything on what I was able to read. You may think it's an uncharitable take, and that's fine. But it's not unwarranted. I don't have the luxury of viewing a completed application, just a couple of posts on a forum.
It's not wrong to want one for elevated status, but it's probably not the most attractive quality in an applicant. I'm not full of anything: the author said "Maybe I'm just being silly and going through the process is not that bad." This indicates previous judgement regarding the process. I'm not making a decision, I'm reflecting what I see. I'm open to being wrong, but this certainly triggered you in the worst way.
There are indeed different perspectives. I offered an honest one. Right or wrong, it's acceptable to do, even if you don't like it and feel compelled to react in such a hostile and immature way.

To the author: I don't think what you wrote is bad and some people in this forum may just feel personally attacked.
To @Psyche007: Yes, I think you're reading too much into it. Like "what do you bring to the table..." Uhm... she or he or they actually brings a lot, and above the average undergrad coming in. This person brings years of experience and a different lifestyle that can add to the classroom/discussions. And they have published books which shows they can write well and is capable of publishing future work. In other words, I imagine they have a great CV (even if it may lack research). And from what is posted, I don't think what they wrote makes them appear above or entitled. I feel like you were just put off by what they wrote, which is just your opinion. But frankly, this person is stating the reality of what most PhD students have to do and they would like to not do part of that in order to manage the life they have built for themselves. So if they would like to disclose in the future that they do not want to do an RA-ship, but opt to do a TA-ship from time to time, why not? I have seen this done countless of times. I literally have a fellowship that pays me to stay at home and do my work (besides from going to class and staying on good academic standing; which is something that is unavoidable). And I am in a top-tier institution for my field. Personally, as long as a student goes to class, gets great grades and stay connected with their advisors, they are fine and motivated enough to get a PhD. And also to your point that they "want to distance themselves from the department, and not be a part of it..." Uhm... is academia a cult? To some, yes... to others, no. A lot of students do not like being required to participate in colloquiums because not all of them relate to their interests or even line up with their schedules. So this person bartering to not have to go to the ones that won't help them due to their work is something this person has every right to do (even if the department says no, at least they asked). And what is wrong with getting a PhD to elevate one's status? You made it seem like its wrong for them to want to do this. A lot of people who get PhDs especially in the sciences get their PhDs for better job prospects, not because they are passionate about learning or research. And to this part "From this information alone, you don't seem invested in the process enough to be worth accepting as a student. You're obviously more than capable of doing all the learning and work by yourself. The degree is just a way of elevating your status." You are really full of it. Who are you to decide whether or not someone is motivated or invested? Just because their motivations are different from yours, it does not give you the right to downplay their desire to obtain a PhD. The reason this person gave is GREAT and it makes sense. You know how many times I heard from students that the reason why they came to a PhD is program is because they didn't know what else to do or that they need this to get a job in their field (especially in the social sciences). And guess what, they still excel and do great. I understand that passion and love for research is what drives a lot of students to do well and get through hard days, but for some its how will this degree help them in the long run. And this person clearly wrote that. So I think, you need to check your bias and understand that there are different perspectives.  
Anyways, to the author of the post. Personally, I think you can say in your application that you have external funding that will cover the stipend/cost of living (once/if you get accepted you can elaborate). I say frame it like that so this way you can be offered a tuition waver. I also suggest framing it this way so that you don't let this matter take up the bulk of your statement since some departments may not care. So, in your statement, only three-four sentences is needed towards the bottom and you can explain the rest over the phone/in person/email if you are admitted.
Also, the biggest lesson here is that your post can be interpreted in different ways. How you framed it didn't bother me but it appeared to ruffle some feathers... So watch how you frame it in discussions and in emails. I don't think what you said is wrong and if you were a identifiable man it would be thought as "highlighting" your experiences (I am unaware of your gender but the fact remains). I have seen people highlight their wants using their accomplishments over and over as a means to barter, especially white cisgender men. So do not feel bad or discouraged! Apply to a wide range of schools (top tier and lower tier). Ph.D. programs are hard to get into normally and our new economic crisis may even make it harder for the years to come. Now in terms of program requirements, there may be things you will have to do because they are required, that is the reality of any position. But I can say for myself that I received an prestigious external fellowship and I can basically do my own research that is not tied to my department, so I have more autonomy than my peers. I can decide to not go to certain department events and will not be judged as harshly as my peers. My funding can't be taken away, so there are benefits to having your own funding. However, even though you can "distance yourself from the department" (in terms of not attending colloquiums, working groups, faculty talks), it may also have an impact on how well you do there and who will work with you. Everyone and every department is different. But a top tier school (like 1-10 or 11-20) may not care that you have funding unless its prestigious or what not (in your case it's not), so I don't think you have an advantage but its also not a disadvantage. Personally your experience as a writer and author is beneficial. Research is important, and it doesn't sound like to me that you have a problem with doing research. And in my experience, I have done projects I wanted to do but there was tweaking and changes here and there (prompted by my advisors) and that is apart of growing. So if you are willing to grow and change, you will be fine. If you are not willing to grow, you will face problems. In terms of not wanting to work in the lab or department, it depends on the discipline you are in. With psychology, you will be required to do lab work. But again, I have seen in cases that advisors work with their students to accommodate their preferences (like doing lab work from home or coming in once a week for lab seminar).
This is all said to say, once and if you are admitted, speak to them. If it doesn't work with you, don't accept. But in your application, don't get ahead of yourself. Just relay 3 to 4 sentences about external funding. Once and if you are admitted you can speak to them about your preferences. The department functions may be something you can haggle (e.g. going to the ones that fall on the days of when you're on campus for class already). For lab, see if advisors had have students who do work from home for the most part, or ask if lab is held once a week or so. Ultimately, they don't need to accommodate your preferences but you never know if its on the table if you don't ask. 
Good Luck!
I wish you the best. 

Hey! 
I am hopefully attending Oregon State in the fall as well! I'll let you know if that's where I officially settle on. I was also not able to visit the program due to work and the pandemic but I was able to visit the campus on my own. My boss lived in Corvallis for many years and recommended some foodie places to me that I enjoyed and thought I'd pass on to you. 
-McMenamins Pub   
- American Dream Pizza 
- If you don't have a dutch bros near you, you should definitely check that out. 
Obviously not very many suggestions, and none of them experiential, but thought I'd give them just the same. If you want to make the ~1.5 hour trip to Portland here's some fun things to do: 
- VooDoo Doughnuts or Blue Star Doughnuts 
-Seeing a Thorns game at Providence Park
- Walk or drive down Mississippi Ave for plenty of local shops and eateries 
- Powell's City of Books (a huge, multi-story bookshop)
- Salt and Straw Ice Cream 
 
Hope this helps! Maybe see you in the fall! 
    

I'm going to Oregon State for HDFS! I'm so excited to move out west. If you are also attending, feel free to message me! Now to decline offers at other programs... yikes ?

I'm going to Oregon State for HDFS! I'm so excited to move out west. If you are also attending, feel free to message me! Now to decline offers at other programs... yikes ?

I'm going to Oregon State for HDFS! I'm so excited to move out west. If you are also attending, feel free to message me! Now to decline offers at other programs... yikes ?

I'm going to Oregon State for HDFS! I'm so excited to move out west. If you are also attending, feel free to message me! Now to decline offers at other programs... yikes ?

Immediately after each interview visit, I made a list of pros and cons for each program. These included the important factors OP mentioned, as well as little things like the appearance of the psych building, difficulty of qualifying exam, weather, teaching opportunities, etc. I ended up paying the most attention to the cons. It's really important to consider which problems you're willing to deal with, versus which will cause you undue stress or even hinder your progress in the program. And if you can think of 3 serious cons for one program and only 2 minor issues for another, it can be an eye-opener as to which program you're actually leaning towards.
Some of the factors that most strongly influenced my decision were 1) whether I could see myself collaborating with other PIs in the area, 2) whether graduates of the program were successful in finding good postdocs/academic jobs, 3) stipend amount relative to cost of living. I also highly valued how well I got along with the other grad students and faculty, but everyone was so nice at each of my visits it was basically a wash across programs!

A big part of my decision is student satisfaction. I wanna study somewhere for the next several years where students report feeling happy and supported. I’m not a competitive person so going somewhere ultra competitive and everyone-for-themselves isn’t something I was into. Unfortunately, part of my decision will be compromising geographic location because this university isn’t exactly anywhere I want to be long term, nor is it a poppin’ place. However, if the students talked about having an awesome cohort and felt supported/heard by both faculty and other students, I really took that into my consideration. 

Congrats! I'm not a Fort Collins native (from Denver) but I visited a lot last year and I also am waiting to hear back on my application to CSU! 
So I mainly know more about the nature side (pros of dating a forester) - there's a LOT of nature-y things to do in Fort Collins. There's Rocky Mountain National Park, Horsetooth Reservoir, the Poudre River, so the best place to visit just kinda depends on when you're visiting. Old Town is a really fun place to go and walk around, there's a lot of good restaurants in Fort Collins. I recommend going to Waltzing Kangaroo - they're Australian meat pies, and are so. good. 

hey folks, 
i'm having a LOT of trouble deciding between offers... i love my potential mentors and programs and happen to have great fit at my accepted institutions. also, i'm waiting on one more official offer which will make the decision harder....
any insights on how to decide? cog psych people - is there any good decision-making literature you can point me towards? lol

hey folks, 
i'm having a LOT of trouble deciding between offers... i love my potential mentors and programs and happen to have great fit at my accepted institutions. also, i'm waiting on one more official offer which will make the decision harder....
any insights on how to decide? cog psych people - is there any good decision-making literature you can point me towards? lol

I also can't wait for Animal Crossing!!

I haven't decided what school yet but I do know I will be attending a Ph.D. program this fall!
I've been traveling as much as my full-time job allows. working on some passion projects (YouTube and blogging), and reading books for fun (I'm a sucker for YA fiction). As well, I just preordered the Animal Crossing Nintendo Switch, so I intend on wasting as much time as possible playing that and Stardew Valley.
Basically, I'm going to do very little to prepare myself for grad school besides my duties in my research lab that I volunteer/work in part-time. I just want to enjoy my time off and live as much as possible.

Once I got accepted at one of my top three schools I declined offers for admission and interviews to other schools that weren't the other two of my top three. This is the basis for the emails I sent:
 
[Dr./Etc...], Thank you so much for your interest in my application and inviting me to [interview for/attend] your program.
I regret to inform you that I will not be [interviewing for/attending] your program, but hope to cross paths with the amazing faculty and students at [University/College] in the future.   Best regards,
[Me]

Something I didn't think to ask in any of mine, but I would if I could go back, is if the mentor and their students (or the program as a whole) seems to foster/thrive best with a competitive or collaborative spirit. I am extremely not competitive. I like doing well and getting recognition, but I am collaborative by nature and am often uncomfortable when put in a situation or discussed in a way that is competitive in comparison to a cohort-mate or friend. One of the things that my supervisors repeatedly note about my therapy style is how collaborative I am with anyone in the room with me, and it's a running joke in both my family of orientation and procreation how not competitive I am when it comes to sports, games or really anything. I am happy when everyone is doing well, and I want everyone to do well.
That said, some people and programs really thrive on competition and there are some amazing programs out there with competitive culture.... and they would not be a good fit for me.
I never thought to ask about, though, until a professor brought it up at a group interview at my last one (he was describing the program culture and said something along the lines of if you are someone who knows they thrive and do well when competition is involved this may not be the best fit program for you, as their culture is on the other end of the spectrum towards collaboration). The sense of relief I got hearing that was profound, and I still wonder why I hadn't even thought about it as one of my criteria for programs before- since it is something that I've internalized as part of my identity.

At my recent interview, here are a couple research-related questions I asked:
1. I noticed in this paper, you chose to utilize "x" measure over "y" measure, despite utilizing "x" in your other papers. Why is that? (Basically, I showed that I noticed a pattern in my POI's methods and noticed they deviated from this pattern in a particular paper. These 2 measures are very similar so I was curious as to why he chose one over the other)
2. I noticed you collected "this data" while examining "this research topic". Have you considered examining "this data" in relation to "this research topic"? (showing that their research inspired you to ask questions shows that you care about their line of research and have ideas of your own to contribute. For example, a faculty member I interviewed with collected racial-ethnic data while examining her topic of interest. I asked her if she considered seeing if race/ethnicity moderated the relationship between "x" and "y." I think she was impressed by this question)
Also, I skimmed most of these papers for the main ideas and went back to whatever I especially found interesting. I didn't spend a crazy amount of time reading every little detail (although it was tempting at times lol). Hope this helps!

@starfleet_grad oooh that's cool! i'll be looking into older adults and their emotions (regulation/how they communicate them)!

I myself never understand the purse girls. Yes, I get that it's a hassle to switch all the items from backpack to handbag, but I don't get how they carry textbooks plus the fucking huge laptops the school makes us use. I know I look like a very unfashionable moron with my dirty backpack, but at least my shoulder doesn't hurt. I think I will purchase a slightly less stupid looking one for grad school, though. A lot of my profs carry backpacks, so I don't think it's shameful.

You could try and tie it back to a mentor relationship that you enjoyed
 
For example, I have a very communicative and interactive relationship with my research mentor in undergrad. If a prof said they have a similar style, you could say something like "I really enjoy that mentoring style. I have a similar relationship with my current research mentor, and I really feel like I do my best work in an environment such as the one you described"
I also really love to say that I LOVE learning (which I do!). This also highlights the fact that you would take critical feedback well, etc.

I made an account just to respond to this! I'm also in HF, which I feel like is not often found on here. It's gonna be my first on-site interview so I'm pretty anxious but excited!

Oh nice! Yeah lots of psychology people but very few forums (or admissions results) in our lil sub field. It’s my first on site interview too but I’m excited. From the video on their site it seems like it’ll be a fun day. There’s apparently a long tour to look forward to!