I is stressed *Non-Judgmental Space for PhD Applicants*

[chopper.wife]

Well.. Going to my first interview on Friday and am suddenly feeling freaked out despite feeling totally calm all week. All of a sudden questioning if I have read enough of my POIs papers, worried I wont have anything original to add to what they are working on, etc.

[dancedementia]

22 hours ago, Psyhopeful said:

I am also older and unconventional (so unconventional that I am also straight out of undergrad) and one of my POIs picked me basically for that reason. I really think that being older is a bonus in terms of feeling more confident around professionals and life experience. Good luck with your interview!

Also older and unconventional (this is a.... third career for me.....) I actually use my variety of jobs as one of my biggest "strengths" when asked in interviews because it means I've worked with folks from such very diverse backgrounds. Plus, I always have great stories to share when I need to make small talk

I've also found that being more experienced/older means that I am not nervous AT ALL on interview days. It's easy to pick out the inexperienced folks because they look so uncomfortable in their suits and aren't quite sure how to conduct themselves. I didn't even wear a suit (chiffon blouse + slacks ftw) but I felt so confident and genuinely enjoyed making small talk and interacting with staff and faculty. It just came very naturally to me. I haven't needed to prep for any of my interviews at all.

Edited January 30, 2019 by dancedementia

[PsychedOutHopeful]

16 minutes ago, dancedementia said:

Also older and unconventional (this is a.... third career for me.....) I actually use my variety of jobs as one of my biggest "strengths" when asked in interviews because it means I've worked with folks from such very diverse backgrounds. Plus, I always have great stories to share when I need to make small talk

I've also found that being more experienced/older means that I am not nervous AT ALL on interview days. It's easy to pick out the inexperienced folks because they look so uncomfortable in their suits and aren't quite sure how to conduct themselves. I didn't even wear a suit (chiffon blouse + slacks ftw) but I felt so confident and genuinely enjoyed making small talk and interacting with staff and faculty. It just came very naturally to me. I haven't needed to prep for any of my interviews at all.

I love the idea of using your variety of jobs as strengths. That’s how I need to look at my background as well. So many good points here, thanks for sharing your perspective. All of these posts are great reminders! 

[xxxxxxxxxx]

1 hour ago, chopper.wife said:

Well.. Going to my first interview on Friday and am suddenly feeling freaked out despite feeling totally calm all week. All of a sudden questioning if I have read enough of my POIs papers, worried I wont have anything original to add to what they are working on, etc.

Going on 3 over the next week and I may just........ pass out from exhaustion lol. This process is so brutal and demandinggggggggggggg, let me in already damn it!!!!!!

[brighteyes]

2 hours ago, dancedementia said:

Also older and unconventional (this is a.... third career for me.....) I actually use my variety of jobs as one of my biggest "strengths" when asked in interviews because it means I've worked with folks from such very diverse backgrounds. Plus, I always have great stories to share when I need to make small talk

I've also found that being more experienced/older means that I am not nervous AT ALL on interview days. It's easy to pick out the inexperienced folks because they look so uncomfortable in their suits and aren't quite sure how to conduct themselves. I didn't even wear a suit (chiffon blouse + slacks ftw) but I felt so confident and genuinely enjoyed making small talk and interacting with staff and faculty. It just came very naturally to me. I haven't needed to prep for any of my interviews at all.

I am also an older, returning student and this is a significant career change. I think looking at varied background and work experience as a strength is huge and very important. We aren't young kids, we've been around and have worked with a diverse group of people under many different conditions. I think it is a huge asset and should be celebrated. I love your confidence and viewpoint!

[spookycat]

Was asked to book a flight across the country 6 days in advanced, and when the $1,000 minimum plane tickets made that impossible, scheduled a skype interview for 7:30 the morning after I get back from a full interview weekend at another school. Did I mention 6 days notice? 

On the bright side, if I can survive this I can survive anything lol

[chopper.wife]

1 hour ago, spookycat said:

Was asked to book a flight across the country 6 days in advanced, and when the $1,000 minimum plane tickets made that impossible, scheduled a skype interview for 7:30 the morning after I get back from a full interview weekend at another school. Did I mention 6 days notice? 

On the bright side, if I can survive this I can survive anything lol

Wtf!! I know some schools are at the mercy of a lot of bureaucratic red tape, but SERIOUSLY, 6 days notice is a joke and kind of disrespectful. 

[anxiouscoffeedrinker]

I graduated this past December from a top 10 research institution with a 4.0 GPA and said school has been asking me to be valedictorian. During undergraduate, I have been working as a PA for a private neuropsych practice working with kids and have been participating in 4 different research groups (1 second author manuscript in progress with a conference coming up in a month, and 3 other manuscripts in progress with potential conference presentations in which I'm co-investigator/second author for). I have very low self-esteem, so I started applying to Ph.D. programs with no expectations, but post-docs, licensed psychologists, and graduate students have been hyping me up since last year saying that I would get in with the amount of experience I have.

I've been rejected to pretty much all of the schools I applied for expect for my safety, in which I have an interview for. Not only do I feel worthless, but I have to go to work several times a week where people have been constantly asking me about grad school results and being surprised that I haven't gotten in anywhere, as if the rejections haven't been crushing enough. So yea, not sure what to do right now and had to get this off of my chest. 

[xChrisx]

19 minutes ago, anxiouscoffeedrinker said:

I graduated this past December from a top 10 research institution with a 4.0 GPA and said school has been asking me to be valedictorian. During undergraduate, I have been working as a PA for a private neuropsych practice working with kids and have been participating in 4 different research groups (1 second author manuscript in progress with a conference coming up in a month, and 3 other manuscripts in progress with potential conference presentations in which I'm co-investigator/second author for). I have very low self-esteem, so I started applying to Ph.D. programs with no expectations, but post-docs, licensed psychologists, and graduate students have been hyping me up since last year saying that I would get in with the amount of experience I have.

I've been rejected to pretty much all of the schools I applied for expect for my safety, in which I have an interview for. Not only do I feel worthless, but I have to go to work several times a week where people have been constantly asking me about grad school results and being surprised that I haven't gotten in anywhere, as if the rejections haven't been crushing enough. So yea, not sure what to do right now and had to get this off of my chest. 

Awwwwwwwwwww. *hugs*

Heyyyyyyyy. You're just finishing undergrad. 4.0 GPA and valedictorian. Enjoy those things.  They don't get diminished because you didn't get into grad school immediately. 

Finish out the rest of the year and enjoy it. Go somewhere crazy for Spring break. Snooze. Just enjoy your last year.

Then look into research assistant jobs you could get even if you have to work for free for a few months. Put a few miles on your CV. Then try again next year.

You are not less because of this experience. Use it wisely and enjoy your journey.

P.S:"It didn't work out this time" is all everyone else needs to hear.

[PsychedOutHopeful]

56 minutes ago, anxiouscoffeedrinker said:

I graduated this past December from a top 10 research institution with a 4.0 GPA and said school has been asking me to be valedictorian. During undergraduate, I have been working as a PA for a private neuropsych practice working with kids and have been participating in 4 different research groups (1 second author manuscript in progress with a conference coming up in a month, and 3 other manuscripts in progress with potential conference presentations in which I'm co-investigator/second author for). I have very low self-esteem, so I started applying to Ph.D. programs with no expectations, but post-docs, licensed psychologists, and graduate students have been hyping me up since last year saying that I would get in with the amount of experience I have.

I've been rejected to pretty much all of the schools I applied for expect for my safety, in which I have an interview for. Not only do I feel worthless, but I have to go to work several times a week where people have been constantly asking me about grad school results and being surprised that I haven't gotten in anywhere, as if the rejections haven't been crushing enough. So yea, not sure what to do right now and had to get this off of my chest. 

This is pretty similar to my experience during my first round of applications. I got into a program I wasn’t excited about, and wasn’t the right fit, but I really wanted to go to a doctoral program straight out of college, so I accepted. It was the wrong fit and I ended up leaving after a year and it was a really painful choice (but the right one). I’ve been working for the past few years and am now reapplying. It has been a tough process, and I really took the first round to heart/ personally. Dealing with other people is tough, but this is such a hard competitive process, and it sounds like you’re a rockstar tbh. Don’t lose sight of that- you wouldn’t have accomplished all you’ve accomplished if you weren’t talented and capable. But sometimes all the talent and capabilities in the world can’t compete with talent+capabilities + years of professional post-college experience. there’s literally nothing you could have done differently there. Keep your head up, don’t settle, and don’t give up ❤️

Edited February 2, 2019 by FreudEgg

[xxxxxxxxxx]

On 1/30/2019 at 5:40 PM, dancedementia said:

Also older and unconventional (this is a.... third career for me.....) I actually use my variety of jobs as one of my biggest "strengths" when asked in interviews because it means I've worked with folks from such very diverse backgrounds. Plus, I always have great stories to share when I need to make small talk

I've also found that being more experienced/older means that I am not nervous AT ALL on interview days. It's easy to pick out the inexperienced folks because they look so uncomfortable in their suits and aren't quite sure how to conduct themselves. 

+1 on this.

Just completed 2 back to back interviews, on my way to the next- Had such a wonderful time!!!!!

Confidence was over the roof and the interviews didn't even feel like interviews at all. No questions about my experience whatsoever. Honestly felt like the faculty were trying to sell me the program/area, they did the majority of the talking! ?

Edited February 2, 2019 by checkingmyemail

[Mickey26]

7 hours ago, checkingmyemail said:

+1 on this.

Just completed 2 back to back interviews, on my way to the next- Had such a wonderful time!!!!!

Confidence was over the roof and the interviews didn't even feel like interviews at all. No questions about my experience whatsoever. Honestly felt like the faculty were trying to sell me the program/area, they did the majority of the talking! ?

Yusss those are the best!! I had something similar over Skype--the POI was basically trying to sell me the program/get me to work for them. Received an unofficial offer of acceptance two days later haha I hope that's the same for you

[xxxxxxxxxx]

1 hour ago, Mickey26 said:

Yusss those are the best!! I had something similar over Skype--the POI was basically trying to sell me the program/get me to work for them. Received an unofficial offer of acceptance two days later haha I hope that's the same for you

That’s so AWESOME!!!! ? Congratulations! 

It’s funny because when debriefing with other applicants, their interview experiences were completely different.

Btw- I literally just had one of the PIs e-mail me (we interviewed just yesterday) so I definitely feel like good/memorable impressions were made!!!! Cheers to us, I am literally rewarding myself at every little milestone of this brutal process ??❤️❤️

[Mickey26]

12 minutes ago, checkingmyemail said:

That’s so AWESOME!!!! ? Congratulations! 

It’s funny because when debriefing with other applicants, their interview experiences were completely different.

Btw- I literally just had one of the PIs e-mail me (we interviewed just yesterday) so I definitely feel like good/memorable impressions were made!!!! Cheers to us, I am literally rewarding myself at every little milestone of this brutal process ??❤️❤️

Haha YUSSS celebrate the little things during this draining process! Keep us posted  I have faith you'll hear something good VERY soon  

[PsychedOutHopeful]

33 minutes ago, checkingmyemail said:

That’s so AWESOME!!!! ? Congratulations! 

It’s funny because when debriefing with other applicants, their interview experiences were completely different.

Btw- I literally just had one of the PIs e-mail me (we interviewed just yesterday) so I definitely feel like good/memorable impressions were made!!!! Cheers to us, I am literally rewarding myself at every little milestone of this brutal process ??❤️❤️

THE BEST. WOOOOO!!!! 

[xxxxxxxxxx]

23 minutes ago, FreudEgg said:

THE BEST. WOOOOO!!!! 

I can’t like shit so ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️??????

[brighteyes]

How are you dealing with your stress?

I am literally eating my weight in gummy candies, specifically star mix and peach rings. Lol. Maybe it isn't the best way to channel my angst, but hey-- it could be worse. What's your go-to?

[Jung&Psyched]

Had my 2nd out of three back to back interview weekends this past weekend and broke out in massive hives the night before the interview.  Urgent Care said it was either a reaction to an antibiotic I had been on....or just stress ?.  However, feel like I did awesome at my interview despite having welts all over my body (luckily nowhere visible) and slightly puffy eyes.  If nothing else, this process is proving that it takes a lot of determination to reach your goals ?

[RidiculousResearcher]

On 2/1/2019 at 4:59 PM, anxiouscoffeedrinker said:

I graduated this past December from a top 10 research institution with a 4.0 GPA and said school has been asking me to be valedictorian. During undergraduate, I have been working as a PA for a private neuropsych practice working with kids and have been participating in 4 different research groups (1 second author manuscript in progress with a conference coming up in a month, and 3 other manuscripts in progress with potential conference presentations in which I'm co-investigator/second author for). I have very low self-esteem, so I started applying to Ph.D. programs with no expectations, but post-docs, licensed psychologists, and graduate students have been hyping me up since last year saying that I would get in with the amount of experience I have.

I've been rejected to pretty much all of the schools I applied for expect for my safety, in which I have an interview for. Not only do I feel worthless, but I have to go to work several times a week where people have been constantly asking me about grad school results and being surprised that I haven't gotten in anywhere, as if the rejections haven't been crushing enough. So yea, not sure what to do right now and had to get this off of my chest. 

This is very real. This is my second round of applications and I had a stellar transcript and GRE scores, and various clinical and research based experience. I had professors and psychologists tell me I was doing all the right things application-wise. I applied for 11 programs and it looks like I will only even get one interview, at a PsyD program which might be okay but I'm reckoning with whether I want a PhD or a PsyD...but a PhD is currently feeling pretty unattainable. It makes me feel pretty stupid and I also get to tell family who ask me LITERALLY every time I see them what the updates are on schools. It feels very lonely and adrift, even though I know many of us are having this same experience. It really makes you wonder what you could have done differently or if you're simply not cut out for it, and it's so hard to tell since Clinical Programs are so heavily competitive that they could have 100 "perfect" candidates to choose from. It makes getting in the door for an interview feel like climbing an academic Mt. Everest...but people are doing it all over the place! Very disappointing and hard to stomach.

[mbx098]

On 2/1/2019 at 7:59 PM, anxiouscoffeedrinker said:

I graduated this past December from a top 10 research institution with a 4.0 GPA and said school has been asking me to be valedictorian. During undergraduate, I have been working as a PA for a private neuropsych practice working with kids and have been participating in 4 different research groups (1 second author manuscript in progress with a conference coming up in a month, and 3 other manuscripts in progress with potential conference presentations in which I'm co-investigator/second author for). I have very low self-esteem, so I started applying to Ph.D. programs with no expectations, but post-docs, licensed psychologists, and graduate students have been hyping me up since last year saying that I would get in with the amount of experience I have.

I've been rejected to pretty much all of the schools I applied for expect for my safety, in which I have an interview for. Not only do I feel worthless, but I have to go to work several times a week where people have been constantly asking me about grad school results and being surprised that I haven't gotten in anywhere, as if the rejections haven't been crushing enough. So yea, not sure what to do right now and had to get this off of my chest. 

This is super real. I've got a post bac in a really well recognized institution, a number of 2nd author publications, 10+ posters and gave an invited talk at a national conference (and of course very solid GRE and GPA). I can't complain, I have a few interviews in really well established and strong institutions, but it especially hurt when my supervisors said they "expected I would get many more." This field is extremely competitive, and even getting one interview straight out of undergrad is an accomplishment! Apply to some prestigious  post bacs in research you really enjoy, get full time research experience, and I promise you will have it in the bag next time around. And don't place your self worth in this!!! 

[today.is.not.the.day]

On 2/2/2019 at 5:16 PM, brighteyes said:

How are you dealing with your stress?

I am literally eating my weight in gummy candies, specifically star mix and peach rings. Lol. Maybe it isn't the best way to channel my angst, but hey-- it could be worse. What's your go-to?

I guess I am not good at it right now :)

OCD-like email checking, fear of missing a phone call, emotional eating...

Usually time goes by so quick because I have work to do but right now I am staring at my computer most of the time... let's add unwanted intrusive thoughts to the list...

But on the bright side, I think hope is not lost until we receive a rejection!

[dancedementia]

On 2/2/2019 at 7:16 PM, brighteyes said:

How are you dealing with your stress?

I am literally eating my weight in gummy candies, specifically star mix and peach rings. Lol. Maybe it isn't the best way to channel my angst, but hey-- it could be worse. What's your go-to?

Refreshing GradCafe obsessively.

Watching Netflix nonstop.

Cleaning the house (!!!!!!)

[PsychedOutHopeful]

tbh. 

[xxxxxxxxxx]

1 hour ago, FreudEgg said:

tbh. 

Me. Waiting to hear post-interviews is the absolute worst LOL!!!!!!

[PsychedOutHopeful]

53 minutes ago, checkingmyemail said:

Me. Waiting to hear post-interviews is the absolute worst LOL!!!!!!

I mean....I feel like there are potentially two great parts of the whole process, finding out you have an interview and getting an offer. Everything in between is pretty much the worst ?? hopefully you get some good news soon !