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*I is stressed* venting thread for Fall 2020 Applicants


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Hi everyone! I just wanted to offer some encouragement during this super stressful, ridiculous process. This is my third time applying for programs. The first time, fresh out of undergrad but fee

So I think I will propose research to see the prevalence of psychiatric disorders caused by PhD application process. 

I’m thinking of pulling a “George” & just showing up on interview day at my #1 school & acting like I was invited. 

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Today I received an email from Johns Hopkins starting with: " Congratulations..." and my heart stopped. Opened email and it turned out to be just a thank you for filling out an inquiry form on their website to receive more info on their program (which I completed days ago). 

I'm going to go and curl up in a ball in the corner of my room until the holidays are over. 

Have only heard back from one of my programs so far. RIP grad school. 

 

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I know the University of Kentucky has sent out invites already (like maybe two weeks ago), but literally yesterday (on Christmas no less) I got an email saying that my application was under review by the program I applied to??????? I guess some programs check out applications in waves? 

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A very accomplished PI said something to me at a holiday party that has really resonated with me and hopefully will help others as well. 

I was discussing how I couldn't wait to get into a program and finally start my career/life. He stopped me and said no, you've already started. This is the early stages of your career. You are succeeding now, working as a research assistant, building a solid CV. The next step is a PhD, but it's not the beginning. 

So, friends. You've already started. You're well on your way! Hope you all had a lovely holiday 🙂

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Hi all, I hope everyone is holding up well and that your holidays are going well. I have one interview invite so far, which is far more than I expected as a first time applicant in undergrad. But, I'm finding myself getting attached to this program, I really like the school, the location, and the PI's research. How do I not get attached? I know there's still so many factors involved for the selection of the final person. Also, my PI may not be able to accept a student, and may not know until after interviews are over. I just don't want to get TOO excited and be more sad than normal later on. Any tips? 

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I am so stressed out recently too, can't stop myself from checking the GradCafe, which helps nothing but make me anxious even more. But really, tracking these information isn't helping, and it's just a fantasy of getting some information back from the school. Wish all the best to all of you guys! I contacted all professors I applied to prior to my application but many of them did not reply yet after I submitted the application, so I am wondering whether I should email them to check if there's any updates.

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6 hours ago, kkkkkkkx said:

I am so stressed out recently too, can't stop myself from checking the GradCafe, which helps nothing but make me anxious even more. But really, tracking these information isn't helping, and it's just a fantasy of getting some information back from the school. Wish all the best to all of you guys! I contacted all professors I applied to prior to my application but many of them did not reply yet after I submitted the application, so I am wondering whether I should email them to check if there's any updates.

I would strongly discourage reaching out to the PIs you applied to for updates. It comes across as pushy and it’s also still winter break for most schools! It’s normal to not be hearing anything right now because of the holidays. If you absolutely need to get an update for scheduling/interview conflict reasonings, email the program admin. Hang in there!! 

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29 minutes ago, hopefulgrad2019 said:

I would strongly discourage reaching out to the PIs you applied to for updates. It comes across as pushy and it’s also still winter break for most schools! It’s normal to not be hearing anything right now because of the holidays. If you absolutely need to get an update for scheduling/interview conflict reasonings, email the program admin. Hang in there!! 

I was recently invited to a program that I could be happy with but it is not at the top of my list & the date could potentially conflict with some of my top choices. My top choice was uncertain as to whether they’d be reviewing apps. I have met with this Dr in the past so they know who I am. Is it appropriate to send an email letting them know that they are my top choice and I would like to know the status? I will not cancel any interviews once I’ve accepted. 

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13 minutes ago, 2ndTimeHopeful said:

I was recently invited to a program that I could be happy with but it is not at the top of my list & the date could potentially conflict with some of my top choices. My top choice was uncertain as to whether they’d be reviewing apps. I have met with this Dr in the past so they know who I am. Is it appropriate to send an email letting them know that they are my top choice and I would like to know the status? I will not cancel any interviews once I’ve accepted. 

Yes! I actually did this last year because I was invited to interview at my 2nd choice (lets call this school A) and it was the same weekend as my 1st choice (school B), which I hadn’t heard from yet. I waited as close as I could to the deadline to let school A know but I emailed the program admin at school B to check on my status when I still hadn’t heard anything. The program admin actually replied saying she was under the impression I was being invited to interview weekend and she’d check with my PI. I got the interview invite for school B very shortly after and let school A know I was unable to attend the interview weekend and asked for a phone interview etc. Again, reiterating to ask the program admin and not the PI. 
 

Feel free to message me and I can provide you with the email I sent to the admin asking for my status. 

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5 hours ago, hopefulgrad2019 said:

I would strongly discourage reaching out to the PIs you applied to for updates. It comes across as pushy and it’s also still winter break for most schools! It’s normal to not be hearing anything right now because of the holidays. If you absolutely need to get an update for scheduling/interview conflict reasonings, email the program admin. Hang in there!! 

Thanks for your suggestion!! I would then probably not email them :( It feels sooooo bad when you see other people receiving interviews from schools I applied to but not hearing back from them. 

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On 12/12/2019 at 4:10 PM, justacigar said:

@Libra924 ETS is a POS! So sorry you are having such a tough time communicating with them. What jerks. 

@justacigar I know, right?  I think I'll be ok though.  If I happen to get a low score on the GRE because they didn't approve my medically necessary accommodation, I will just explain this in an addendum on my law school applications.  I will explicitly state that there was a disagreement between my physician and ETS over a medically necessary accommodation, and if they need proof, I actually have a signed letter from my doctor stating that I require an accommodation for extended testing time.  It's really as simple as that.

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Anyone else having a hard time staying positive?? I feel like I'm putting so much energy into convincing myself that there is still plenty of time to hear back from schools and I am worthy of an interview (at least) but I don't believe myself lol. The uncertainty and variability of the process are difficult to handle!

My impatience is my far my most annoying quality 😅

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9 minutes ago, justacigar said:

Anyone else having a hard time staying positive?? I feel like I'm putting so much energy into convincing myself that there is still plenty of time to hear back from schools and I am worthy of an interview (at least) but I don't believe myself lol. The uncertainty and variability of the process are difficult to handle!

My impatience is my far my most annoying quality 😅

I feel you! Esp since two of the schools I wanted already sent out interviews and I have yet to hear anything. Disheartening to say the least =(

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8 minutes ago, justacigar said:

Anyone else having a hard time staying positive?? I feel like I'm putting so much energy into convincing myself that there is still plenty of time to hear back from schools and I am worthy of an interview (at least) but I don't believe myself lol. The uncertainty and variability of the process are difficult to handle!

My impatience is my far my most annoying quality 😅

9 minutes ago, merpppy said:

I feel you! Esp since two of the schools I wanted already sent out interviews and I have yet to hear anything. Disheartening to say the least =(

I feel you both! I also absolutely despise uncertainty and this unpredictable process really makes us question our strengths and qualities...

In case anyone find helpful, I would like to share my two mottos that I religiously live by, in terms of academic/career life: 1) This is fundamentally me overcoming myself and 2) I didn't come this far, only to come this far. 

Happy New Years, everyone. Hope you treat yourself with good food and great quality sleeps at the least!

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19 minutes ago, merpppy said:

I feel you! Esp since two of the schools I wanted already sent out interviews and I have yet to hear anything. Disheartening to say the least =(

Yeah, two of my lowest ranked schools already sent out interview invites. It's tough to not feel completely unqualified now, lol.

 

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Just now, devpsych2020 said:

I feel you both! I also absolutely despise uncertainty and this unpredictable process really makes us question our strengths and qualities...

In case anyone find helpful, I would like to share my two mottos that I religiously live by, in terms of academic/career life: 1) This is fundamentally me overcoming myself and 2) I didn't come this far, only to come this far. 

Happy New Years, everyone. Hope you treat yourself with good food and great quality sleeps at the least!

I love that!

One of my favorites is "Nothing to it but to do it". Reminds me to just keep chugging along, don't get too caught up in my own head, and any movement is better than no movement.

I hope 2020 has some amazing things in store for us all!

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Did anyone else see a school they applied to (and professor as well!) send out invites, but you didn't get one? I'm freaking out over here!! Especially since one of them is my top school. This what I guess I get for poor GRE scores!:( 

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14 minutes ago, merpppy said:

Did anyone else see a school they applied to (and professor as well!) send out invites, but you didn't get one? I'm freaking out over here!! Especially since one of them is my top school. This what I guess I get for poor GRE scores!:( 

I've seen one possibly this cycle, though the school it was for has two clinical psych faculty members with the same initials, so....🙃 To be safe, I've like mentally crossed them off even though it's possible that it's not who I applied with.

What's also killing me is the fact that I've seen preliminary interviews for some of my desired schools roll in and yet my inbox reminds quiet. I understand that they're just preliminary phone/skype calls and that they don't mean I'm out (negating the fact that I don't know who their POIs are), but it still causes my anxiety to raise.

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It's so refreshing to see SO MANY people who are reacting the same way I am right now - OP could literally be me, I know interview requests aren't likely to go out until next week at the earliest for my schools but I can't stop obsessively checking if anyone else heard anything! 

I have been having a lot of trouble staying calm. This is something I have worked so hard for, for so long. I know many of us go through multiple rounds of applications before securing a program, but that idea is so frustrating that I'm feeling overly desperate to get into one this round lol. Like, I already took several years off to get research experience and I just don't know what my next step will be if I don't get in!

I can't stop obsessing about getting into my top choice school. I keep imagining the interview, what my life will be like, etc. etc., past the point of just positive thinking. It's like I can't think about anything else! And I keep having trouble sleeping at night because I can't stop running through what the interview might be like. In my spare time I'm usually on here or reading my POI's research. It's just a couple more weeks but I want to be able to settle down! I'm trying to work out more and do more hobby/craft type things to keep the anxiety at bay.

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I havent have a good night of sleep in a while. Currently, I am learning how to write and its difficult. I tend to wake up in the middle of the night just because my brain decided that there are some rules/perspectives about writing that I need to "write down". Since I am currently in Alaska, I check my emails as soon as I wake up, since most of the day has passed in the lower 48. Finally, I can't wait for this process to be over; I wish you all a great and joyful year!

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4 hours ago, PsychHopeful2020 said:

It's so refreshing to see SO MANY people who are reacting the same way I am right now - OP could literally be me, I know interview requests aren't likely to go out until next week at the earliest for my schools but I can't stop obsessively checking if anyone else heard anything! 

I have been having a lot of trouble staying calm. This is something I have worked so hard for, for so long. I know many of us go through multiple rounds of applications before securing a program, but that idea is so frustrating that I'm feeling overly desperate to get into one this round lol. Like, I already took several years off to get research experience and I just don't know what my next step will be if I don't get in!

I can't stop obsessing about getting into my top choice school. I keep imagining the interview, what my life will be like, etc. etc., past the point of just positive thinking. It's like I can't think about anything else! And I keep having trouble sleeping at night because I can't stop running through what the interview might be like. In my spare time I'm usually on here or reading my POI's research. It's just a couple more weeks but I want to be able to settle down! I'm trying to work out more and do more hobby/craft type things to keep the anxiety at bay.

Literally me. My exact thoughts. You are not alone! 

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6 hours ago, PsychHopeful2020 said:

It's so refreshing to see SO MANY people who are reacting the same way I am right now - OP could literally be me, I know interview requests aren't likely to go out until next week at the earliest for my schools but I can't stop obsessively checking if anyone else heard anything! 

I have been having a lot of trouble staying calm. This is something I have worked so hard for, for so long. I know many of us go through multiple rounds of applications before securing a program, but that idea is so frustrating that I'm feeling overly desperate to get into one this round lol. Like, I already took several years off to get research experience and I just don't know what my next step will be if I don't get in!

I can't stop obsessing about getting into my top choice school. I keep imagining the interview, what my life will be like, etc. etc., past the point of just positive thinking. It's like I can't think about anything else! And I keep having trouble sleeping at night because I can't stop running through what the interview might be like. In my spare time I'm usually on here or reading my POI's research. It's just a couple more weeks but I want to be able to settle down! I'm trying to work out more and do more hobby/craft type things to keep the anxiety at bay.

I feel the exact same as well. You’re not alone, it is a frustrating and anxiety-inducing process.

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