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Venting Thread- Vent about anything.


MoJingly

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(This has NOTHING to do with anyone in this thread! It's just a coincidence that it was just mentioned.)

 

People who complain about the GRE and their scores but didn't or don't study. I was talking to some people applying to grad school (professional master's programs), and they asked me how the GRE went. It went fine for me, but I had studied quite a bit and did prep from 4 months in advance. So. Of course I didn't suck at it. I didn't rock it quite like I wanted to, but I was happy enough to not retake it.

 

But they sat there whining about how hard it is, how they haven't done any work for it and are so worried to take it in two weeks, and how they're worried they won't even manage 50-60th percentile because they couldn't even do well in practice tests. Well... No shit? This isn't overachievers talking who are worried about only getting a 168Q, it's people who have done almost no work and are surprised at the consequence. Seriously. For my field, which two of these girls were applying to, the average GREs are pretty low (around low 150s, and not even a 4.0W though schools desire a 4.0W). Obviously not everyone can get 99th percentile, but if you aren't studying and won't, don't complain about your score. Suck it up and study or accept your crap score. Don't wonder why it's hard if you haven't done even the minimum amount of prep.

 

(I'm not poking fun at those with low scores either; just venting at the people wondering how it could be so hard when they've done almost no studying.)

Edited by MangoSmoothie
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Just found out that my roommate is planning on moving out a week later than previously mentioned, which throws off plans for having the apartment cleaned and having a family member visit. I had just gotten everything coordinated for the transition ... now it's back to square one, sigh.

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So, digging into applications and colleges and narrowing down POI's. 

 

And I have a big problem. My significant other will only move with me if I end up in the Seattle or SF Bay Area. It is a hard line, there is not much room for compromise. I wish I could roll with it more, but his support through my Master's and the past several years has been one of the big reasons I have been able to succeed. Frankly, he has become very important to my life. And I hold no expectation that a long-distance thing will work, and most of the support I need really requires a physical presence.

 

So, the only school in those areas that I have any interests aligning with faculty is Stanford. On the bright side, my interests are very close to the faculty I intend to apply to. The other 3 schools I'm applying to... all East Coast and Mid-West...

 

I will be thrilled to get in anywhere, and I will have to leave one way or another. I am just really dreading that I'll have to make that decision.

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I'm living in my first house in a long time where you have to turn on the gas and then light the stove/stovetop with an actual match. Of course, 4 of the last 5 movies I have watched have, entirely by coincidence, featured houses/rooms/people blowing up because they turned on the gas and then took too long to light the thing. Great fuel for paranoia!

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Looking for apartments cross country. Arrrg! I was trying to avoid apartment complexes because my husband hates people and thrives when he has a lot of space outside. I found a few really great houses and duplexes with fantastic rent and sizeable yards, but the owners were uncomfortable renting to someone who currently lives far away. There's also a rental company that manages a ton of properties around the area, and I found some pretty good apartments and houses listed... but they won't rent to someone without viewing it first. Ugh. I don't have the money to fly out to Oregon and spend a few days looking at places.

I finally did find a few places that wouldn't mind renting to me, but they have awesome $40 per person application fee. At least one said they'll apply it towards rent if we're accepted. It's a pretty nice apartment from the photos, but a little more than I wanted to pay in rent.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Getting things packed for the big move in September. While doing so, I've realized that I have so much stuff that I really can do without. I don't need my dragon collection... most of it has been in boxes for several years anyway because I don't have enough space to display it all. Yeah, the new apartment has space, but do I really need 6 big boxes worth of dragons? Then there's my grandmother's dishes, glasses, and Christmas decorations. Sure, there's sentimental value, but truthfully most of it is ugly and I'd rather buy new stuff.

I really only want to keep books, movies, music, a small video game collection, and a few assorted figurines and ceramics (maybe a box worth). Most of it can be mailed for under $100 through media mail. I do have some nice kitchen things my mom bought me that I haven't used yet (pots, pans, blender, etc), but these also can be shipped inexpensively via UPS. My canoe and kayak will fit on the roof of my car. All of the furniture can be replaced for less than it would cost to move it across the country.

Sounds like I have everything figured out. Severely downsize and go shopping when I reach my destination. One problem. My husband has a collection. He applauds my desire to cut loose from my belongings and is excited about the prospect of getting a more comfortable bed. He's even trimmed down his collection, but it's still rather big. And heavy. It's made up of old telegraph insulators. We need to weigh his boxes, but I estimate that it will all weigh 600 pounds, possibly 700. We can't put that much weight into the car. At most, we can put 500 pounds in after accounting for our body weight plus the canoe, kayak, bike, and cats, and I have a few items that must go in the car. A solution is to ship some of the collection... yes, shipping 200 pounds of glass and porcelain would be expensive, but it would still be more cost effective than renting a moving container for our boxes and furniture (which will be around $2500). So what's the problem? He doesn't trust UPS and he thinks shipping them to himself is dumb. Ugh.

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I am absolutely stymied by the labyrinthine employment forms and practices created by the massive university HR department (it's centralized) regarding student appointments. I worked a summer job in one department and am now trying to get my fellowship straightened out for fee remission in the fall, but my fall TA/RA appointments in my home department can't be approved because it looks like I'm already at too high of a % time to get fee remission due to my summer job in this other department, which is ending this Friday (coincidentally, also the deadline to start paying fall tuition fees).

 

In sum, my fee remission hasn't kicked in and I'm staring at a huge tuition bill that I don't even owe - and it can sometimes take HR weeks to straighten stuff like this out after they misfile paperwork multiple times and fail to send key emails. All I can do is send endless emails back and hope for the best. I positively abhor bureaucracy - this takes the cake for most complex experience in that realm that I've had, and I used to live in a country where bureaucracy was king.

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I'm so overwhelmed right now. I need to start emailing potential PI's (I've only contacted 1 so far), but I don't have a complete CV to send and I'm so afraid of shooting myself in the foot with an unflattering initial email. That one PI in question hasn't gotten back to me and I can't help but imagine him reading that email and shooting it straight to the trash. 

I'm also trying to learn how to program my senior thesis in PsychToolbox/MatLab with no previous programming experience, and my PI wants me to be finished by the start of the semester. I really don't want to disappoint her but it's just not going to happen. If I didn't have grad school stuff to worry about/work on, and a separate time-consuming summer position, I'd have gotten a lot farther than I have.... but I'm literally still in the "how do I make a rectangle" stage. I also had someone tell me that PsychToolbox is a bad choice because it's going obsolete, and I have no idea if that's true :(

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I'm so overwhelmed right now. I need to start emailing potential PI's (I've only contacted 1 so far), but I don't have a complete CV to send and I'm so afraid of shooting myself in the foot with an unflattering initial email. That one PI in question hasn't gotten back to me and I can't help but imagine him reading that email and shooting it straight to the trash. 

I'm also trying to learn how to program my senior thesis in PsychToolbox/MatLab with no previous programming experience, and my PI wants me to be finished by the start of the semester. I really don't want to disappoint her but it's just not going to happen. If I didn't have grad school stuff to worry about/work on, and a separate time-consuming summer position, I'd have gotten a lot farther than I have.... but I'm literally still in the "how do I make a rectangle" stage. I also had someone tell me that PsychToolbox is a bad choice because it's going obsolete, and I have no idea if that's true :(

Emailing potential PI's is a crapshoot. They either won't even see the email/ignore it/or tell you that they are down to talk with you during the interview. IF you hear no responses, don't worry. 

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Emailing potential PI's is a crapshoot. They either won't even see the email/ignore it/or tell you that they are down to talk with you during the interview. IF you hear no responses, don't worry. 

This particular program actually requires a statement of commitment from your desired PI, before your application to the department will even be accepted.... So in this case, I'm very worried :unsure: 

I do appreciate the reassurance, though! It'll hold true for some of the other people I have to contact, so I'll keep it in mind.

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This particular program actually requires a statement of commitment from your desired PI, before your application to the department will even be accepted.... So in this case, I'm very worried :unsure: 

I do appreciate the reassurance, though! It'll hold true for some of the other people I have to contact, so I'll keep it in mind.

 I personally wouldn't worry just yet about not hearing back from a POI. This is a really terrible time to email them, actually, as semesters at many universities are starting in a week and professors are getting lectures and such together. There is basically a window from around 1 - 2 weeks before the semester starts until probably 3 weeks after it starts that emailing a POI really is a crapshoot because they have so much going on and students are emailing them like crazy about course-related stuff, changing schedules, etc. Your email may very well get lost in the crowd, or get set aside until the POI has time to devote to you (and you are likely quite low on his/her list of priorities). Even at non-peak times, professors still get a lot of email, and may accidentally delete yours or set it aside for later and forget about it. 

I would say that if you haven't heard back after 2 weeks, it's ok to send a follow-up email. So don't panic :)

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I love the GA office. I really do. I also love monitoring the SONA research pool. Unfortunately, since the contract does not cover summer months, I use some months to say work other jobs that will help me gain experience and pay the bills.

 

Insert professor who has a history of forgetting/pushing GA roles. He tends to think of the GA office as a doctoral GA experience. Where, we are contracted for more obligations including covering and teaching classes, proctoring full exams, etc. Unfortunately, our contract does not cover these components. So, he gave my name to a faculty member (different department) who wants to use SONA next semester. All well and good. That guy is pleasant and nice, but unfortunately wants his study ready to start once the semester begins. So, I've been putting in additional time during my summer to help him out. 

 

Instead of the original faculty member recognizing the extra time, he's getting snippy when it takes longer, asking if I'm contacting the IRB (when I have zero correspondence with IRB- that's done before posted my role begins), and to figure out an aspect of SONA that no one's requested to use in about 5 years. I'd be happy to work on this all beginning on Monday, when the semester begins, even though my contract doesn't start until the Monday after. But right now, I'm biting my tongue. 

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Feeling cranky. Drove from northeastern Pennsylvania to southeastern North Carolina on Friday to spend a week with my best friend before heading to the west coast. Got there and my husband told me the clutch in his car is gone. It only had to last one more week and he was selling it to a friend's father for $800... the guy will still buy it from him, but for only $450. Had to leave North Carolina on Monday (only spending 2 days with my friend) so he can use our new car to get to work. Feeling really ripped of by life at the moment, because it's going to be a while before I will see any of my friends again.

Also feeling cranky about apartment business. It's been 2 weeks since I mailed the security deposit for our new apartment. We were supposed to get some paperwork e-mailed to us to formally reserve the apartment the day we were notified that our application was accepted. Didn't get it and thought maybe they wanted to wait for my check to clear or something. Contacted them last week and they confirmed that they received the check and would e-mail the paperwork shortly... I think that was Wednesday. The check cleared on Friday and I still haven't received anything from them. E-mailed them yesterday about and am still waiting. I hope this isn't a sign that it's going to suck living there :(

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 I personally wouldn't worry just yet about not hearing back from a POI. This is a really terrible time to email them, actually, as semesters at many universities are starting in a week and professors are getting lectures and such together. There is basically a window from around 1 - 2 weeks before the semester starts until probably 3 weeks after it starts that emailing a POI really is a crapshoot because they have so much going on and students are emailing them like crazy about course-related stuff, changing schedules, etc. Your email may very well get lost in the crowd, or get set aside until the POI has time to devote to you (and you are likely quite low on his/her list of priorities). Even at non-peak times, professors still get a lot of email, and may accidentally delete yours or set it aside for later and forget about it. 

I would say that if you haven't heard back after 2 weeks, it's ok to send a follow-up email. So don't panic :)

Aw man! And here I was trying to be slick, getting these emails out early.

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We are recently engaged! Hooray! 

Now I'm trying to plan a wedding and research jobs and finish grad school.  TRYING TO KEEP EVERYBODY HAPPY HERE. 

 

Congratulations!!! This may be me towards the end of my PhD if I can get over my mental blocks about marriage. :)Have fun wedding planning!

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Sometimes I wish I never met my husband 

Not sure where you are comming from here, but I have certainly had similar sentiments about my ex-husband. He set me back, and especially in the last 5 years or so sucked all of my resources (financial, emotional, etc). I think I would be much further along sans that particular relationship. :-/

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Not sure where you are comming from here, but I have certainly had similar sentiments about my ex-husband. He set me back, and especially in the last 5 years or so sucked all of my resources (financial, emotional, etc). I think I would be much further along sans that particular relationship. :-/

I love my husband and things are generally fine between us. However, sometimes he is so insensitive, selfish, and bone-headed and makes life so much harder than it needs to be. I feel so bad when he gets like this and he can't understand why no matter how hard I try to explain. I was literally in tears earlier. 

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