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Please help me grade an issue essay (GRE)

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Issue: People who make decisions based on emotion and justify those decisions with logic afterwards are poor decision makers.


Task: Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.


Essay: People make decisions every day. Some of them are related to ourselves, some of them involve other people. While a poor decision in one case can be harmless, it can also play a crucial role in people's lives in another situation. Sometimes emotion-based decisions can lead to a good outcome, and we usually define people who make successful emotion-based decisions as people with good intuition. However, in mots case emotion-based decisions can lead to dramatically negative outcomes.
Analysis should be done with a clear head, so the results can be interpreted without any biases. If a person has already made a decision based on his intuition, or based on his liking or disliking of a certain thing, then it is absolutely useless to analyze the situation. A person can always find an explanation for a situation, or justify his/her decision if he already knows the final goal.
In some situations our decisions involve lives of others. A judge, for example, has a tremendous responsibility on his/her shoulders. What would happen to our society of judges made all decisions in criminal cases based on their emotions? How many good-looking murderers, who can easily mislead people with their fake smiles, will be free and continue to make their horrible deeds? The same argument is valid for doctors, engineers, and many more other professions where people need to make decisions based on facts and facts only.
It is worth noticing that in some circumstances, emotions can play a positive role. Business world is a good example here. Directors, owners, and business strategists do not always equipped with all information that they need in order to make a decision. However, a decision needs to be made. Steve Jobs, a famous american entrepreneur, had to make many decisions without having sufficient information about consumers and a market, because the business he was in--personal computers--was absolutely new, and there were no data available. So Steve Jobs made many decisions, listening to his intuition, what we also can call "emotion-based" decisions, and then he made his employees work to prove those decisions were right. In the end, his decisions were right, and Apple Computers became the most valuable company in the world. 
Approach to making decisions should be taken with regard to the circumstances. Sometimes we have plenty of information to perform an analysis, and then make conclusions based on the data we get. However, this is not always the case. A person has to understand a consequences of his/her decisions. If someone's life depends on your decision--you should base it on facts. Doctors, judges,police offices, and engineers should understand that lack of information cannot always justify an emotion-based decision.

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A couple of things.

It will be better if in your first paragraph you explicitly state your stance. Also the examples stated like the one about good looking murders doesn't seem so solid (better example might be what if the judge is related to the criminal) . The one about Steve jobs making emotion based decision also sounds wrong. I think it was the opposite with him. But in gerneral also to state that Innovators make emotion based decision doesn't seem right. Also you doesn't seem to address the second part of the essay where someone justifies his/her emotion based decision.
All in all just clearly state your stand and make better examples?

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