That makes sense, Beatrice. For the record, I am the first in my family to go to college, so it's not as though I have hordes of informed people in my life either, but I can appreciate that you might feel more disconnected from the process than I. My problem with this site is that I think it leads people to assume the worst, when really, until you are rejected you have no idea what is going to happen with your application. It doesn't personally help me to know that someone has been contacted by Cornell, for example. I have not heard from them, so perhaps (probably?) I am rejected, but perhaps I am just not at the very top of their list, and I might hear from them later.
"Kiss of death" behavior would include, I imagine, getting drunk at a visit, making a pass at someone, insulting a staff or faculty member?