I completely agree with you, that is total b.s. when people are bff with all these grad committee members, etc. And how can you have an advisor if you haven't even been accepted? It mystifies me. The only reason I know about Udel is because my advisor is an alum. I'm sociology, so I suppose deadlines are different. It's probably still a good thing that you haven't heard from Rutgers if others have been rejected, that usually means you're in the second round (if someone doesn't accept, they'll offer it to you).
But since you're from around Udel, tell me about it! Assuming I get accepted (fingers, toes and legs crossed!), I'm SOC with a criminology focus, and they have an excellent program for it, I am planning to come out and visit. Is there a lot to do? And what is the bigger city named that is by Newark? I really wanted a more urban atmosphere and Newark seems awfully suburban, what are your thoughts?