I accepted an offer for a Clinical Psychology PhD program to start this fall 2017. The program is one of the few with a neuropsychology concentration in my area. Unfortunately, I didn't receive the best financial package-- though it's doable. The faculty at the R1 university where I currently work urged me to accept the offer because nonetheless it's a good program and they know my future advisors (research fit is good). So I accepted because it was the best offer I got all-around, and also at this rate I'll be almost mid-30s if I graduate on time. I had limited my apps locally for my fiancé, who was planning to buy a house around here.
My fiancé will have to help me with finances and he doesn't mind at all. However, I'm having second thoughts now for a few reasons. The housing market in our expensive locale recently rose to where you have to pay half a mil for a crappy house. So now he wants to hold off, which means I'd have to commute ~1.5 hours for school while living with my parents a bit longer. Fiancé has had to commute 1.5-2 hr for full-time work and says it's do-able. BUT is it really possible as a FT student who will also have research and externship responsibilities??? The major downers I'm looking at are:
horrible commute through a major metropolitan area, not an easy highway drive; if it were I think I'd be fine but the traffic, various bridges, and through city streets will be stressful
living with parents (which is a cramped house; I wouldn't have sufficient space to sprawl out and work as I do best, and our sleep schedules are very different, meaning I might be driving extremely tired [dangerous] and be a zombie in classes..)
cost (partial tuition, lost wages by not working)-- again, fiancé doesn't mind paying, but his money is basically my money (as he says) and we could be using that $$ for other things
Should I suck up this imperfect situation and plunge ahead with what I already committed to do anyway? Also, of course I wouldn't be happy about telling everyone I changed my mind, but I'm also not so concerned with my potential advisor- the program allows students to choose labs during the 1st couple months and I know other students will be picking his lab. (He also didn't email me back when I told him I was accepting! Strange, though I know he's not great w email in general) And there are ~15 incoming students.. which confirms the program being more like a PsyD model.
Alternatively, now that I know I won't even live with my fiancé, should I try a second round and include programs around the country with solid, better funding? I don't mind being long-distance for a few years.. though that might be weird because we'll be married next year. That's also like spitting my fiance's generous offer back in his face, and I know he wouldn't want me to move. Additionally, if I apply again, who knows whether I'll even get any offers.
1 or 2? Any thoughts appreciated . I'm most likely going to stick with the program, but if anyone has any wisdom, feel free. I hate to be so conflicted before even registering for classes!