Stephani673

hi all, I'm new here and desperately need some advice. I am about to start the second year of a doctoral program. I've been through two master's programs already (MLS, MA History) with the goal of working in a library/historical society/museum. I also have a pretty serious medical condition so, for the last 12-13 years, my life has been a continuous cycle of academic programs-hospitalization. The year before I started my program was pretty awful -- I lost my dad to prostate cancer, my aunt died the previous spring, two family friends passed away, a complication with exploratory surgery perforated my intestines and led to collapsed lungs, and a second procedure 6 months later also led to perforated intestines. Rather than taking time off before the program started, my family and my department chair pushed for me to start in the fall. It didn't hurt that one of the last conversations I had with my dad was to tell him that I had gotten in with full funding. This Spring semester my mom had heart surgery (with complications) and I've been taking care of her, my 95 year old grandfather, 4 dogs, and my sister who has MS (on weekends) while going to school full-time, working as a research assistant at my univ., and teaching at a local college. If I continue for another year, I'll have completed all the coursework required to take quals so I'll be ABD. On the one hand, it could mean a pay boost at my current job, assuming the pay increase doesn't force them to let me go. On the other hand, my dad's death and my own health issues brought the value of time into sharp relief for me. I'm increasingly aware of just how much time I've lost between school and illness. The other part of it is that I'm just exhausted. I haven't had time off in years. When I'm on break from one program, I'm still teaching. Or there are other commitments. My illness also causes severe fatigue so the effort of getting up and going to classes/teach is draining. I'm about 98% convinced to email my director and ask for the year off so I can rest and regroup. The problem is, I don't know how to do it. Last fall the grad program director rearranged my schedule to independent studies and online because I was in the hospital for the first month of the semester and couldn't physically be there. I did well in the classes I took from her, but my spring semester wasn't exactly stellar because I was so stressed/distracted/tired/sick. I'm just afraid they're going to be sick of dealing with my situation and I'll lose funding/reputation when I come back. Any suggestions on how to phrase the email asking for time off? Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks, Stephanie