Matt Haviland

thanks again to everyone. I felt some what ashamed at first reading some of the comments claiming that I need to be careful not to become a "Helicopter Parent" I have been able to take a step back this week and realize that I have been pushing jhim probably more than I should have. The more I have read on my own I have learned that he had been doing an excellent job without my help. But he has told me when discussing some of the feedback I received that he did not feel I was stepping over the line and that my pushing has helped to keep the process more in the foreground versus the background. So all is good and he is at Georgia Tech this weekend for a visit and has already been accepted at Texas A&M. I do have to admit I am living vicariously through him and I am enjoying it.

Thanks all for you comments. I am glad I was able to ask this question and receive such insightful feedback. I will continue to support my son by allowing him to learn from his own decision making. Knowing the importance of submitting good applications I became concerned that he has been so focused on his final semester that he had missed some deadlines for submissions of applications. But having read the thoughtful responses I will continue to support him from a distance as we had up to this point. Thanks much for your responses.

I am assisting my son who has submitted applications to 6 grad schools. He is finishing his UG and is applying for Phd at various schools. I asked him to let me read the letters of recommendations that he has requested from Professors and to other notables from the 3 different internships he did with NASA. I thought it would be interesting to read them to get a feel for how well the letters promoted his work. I also thought it would be good to have these for the future when he needed possibly for job interviews in the future. My son said he didn't have them or had not read them. He said it is not common to see them or get a copy from the recommender. I thought this was strange but he might be right even though it seems strange to me to not be able to read what is being said about you on something this important. Does anyone have any history or knowledge of this question?