lalameans

Forget your past and your guilt for a moment and focus on just one question to make your decision: Do YOU feel that you truly deserve to participate in this program, based on your current potential and dedication in regard to this field? Only you can answer that question, and do not lie to yourself; if the answer is yes, I say GO FOR IT- enroll in the program and put the past behind you. Traditional wisdom would say that someone who failed twice at doctoral studies should not enroll in a Ph.D. program ever again, but there are few exceptions to a rule such as this. You said that you have justification for withdrawing those two times, so if you really believe that and you do not think your past represents a deficiency in your ability to succeed, then I sincerely think you should not feel guilty. In that case, I urge you NOT to confess- accept the offer, but give the program 200% of your effort and dedication in return for the circumstances regarding your acceptance. Remember that if you TRULY will be an asset to this program and to this field, your enrollment will be to everyone's benefit, and nothing in your past will be relevant in the long run. In this case, anyone who found out about your past failures would realize that you really DID deserve a third chance. On the other hand, if you think that you have taken a spot away from someone more deserving, and you have any serious doubts about your ability to succeed this (third) time, then you really should decline the offer. I don't care what anyone here says...if you do enroll in this program and achieve stellar results, it is VERY unlikely that your past will ever matter. The likelihood of people finding out will diminish exponentially with each semester that you excel in the program, and so will the likelihood that they will CARE even if they do find out. These forums are full of so-called "academic saints" who love to go around and lambast others using the terms "academic integrity" and "academic honesty", although if you were to thoroughly examine the history of every move that THEY ever made in the academic world, you will only confirm that nobody is a saint. I am NOT condoning dishonesty in any way, but I have to be truthful, and so I must admit that less-than-saintly behavior is nearly omnipresent in academia in one form or another, even among almost every 4.0 student and world-renowned researcher. Anyone who says that "misrepresentations" equally severe as yours are not common among the big-wigs in academia is simply lying. What I'm trying to say is: do not feel guilty just because the academic world pressures you to feel guilty; feel guilty IF you are accepting a position that you do not truly deserve according to your abilities and dedication. One more thing: remember that if you do confess now, not only will you almost definitely lose your chance to participate in this program, but you will probably NEVER be able to enroll in a Ph.D. program in the future. Make sure that you're okay with that before confessing. Furthermore, don't forget that anyone whom you tell may "snitch" on you with publicity that knows no bounds, and your future career plans may be ruined (even beyond the scope of graduate studies).