Possible Sources for Funding

[Grad Panic]

So, I have thought about sources for funding:

1.) becoming a drug mule for a South American drug cartel

2.) selling my students' kidneys

3.) pimping my husband.

Pros: I get to visit South America, the students have extra kidneys, I don't have to undergo surgery and my husband gets laid on a regular basis.

Cons: The drug cartel can be a tough life, possible arrests for getting kids to give up their kidneys, the black market is sketchy, the kidneys might not be top quality, and some people might ask for their money back with my husband.

I hope I didn't offend anyone. I just need to vent...

If anyone else wants to share in creative ideas for funding (while we take five minute breaks from grant writing and scholarship applications) please contribute to this thread.

I need a laugh, guys, so post away. If you don't have a warped sense of humor, then don't contribute.

p.s.: my husband knows I wrote this, thinks it's funny and is not offended.