Please review my AWA(GRE) issue task and help me do better

[saitharun04]

Essay topics *

The study of an academic discipline alters the way we perceive the world. After studying the discipline, we see the same world as before, but with different eyes.MY

My Essay:

We should totally accept the truth that discipline alters the way we say the world,discipline acts as major part of our life which show a lot of things in different directions.Having good  discipline in oneself would make us a better human first then any other achiever. Discipline is not only the factor responsible for us to perceive the world but there are other factors too.For example a person might have proper discipline within him but he might be really good at heart and help others who are in need. 

Disciplines should be thought from a early age only,this will help the children to see the world in different perspectives.It can be subject in the school where students can learn it. Discipline should be thought by parents of the child too.For instance we take a situation where a boy in school liked one of his friend pencil ,that boy will tend to steal that pencil from him if he does not have proper discipline.But if his does,then he would ask his mother or that friend only to get another similar pencil to him.Hence discipline make a person better human and increases the ability to think in various ways. 

If a human lacks discipline it might cost him a lot in his life,it might get that person down in his career too.For example once a great male director in film industry misbehaved and molested women who was one his movie caste,due to this bad behavior his fame and money got effected to him and his lost a beautiful career. This lose is only because that director did not have proper discipline in him,if he had good discipline he would never molest or misbehave with a women. 

The argument can be concluded by saying that discipline plays a major role in once life and it would really effect it. Having proper discipline would not get you into bad situations and would also let you think different outcomes from different perspectives.

 

THANKS FOR YOUR HELP......