Would someone please critique and rate my essay?

[Ahmed Rifan]

In any situation, progress requires discussion among people who have contrasting points of view.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

 Essay:

Contrasting opinions may sometimes frighten us when we are presenting our views. But, discussion among people with contrasting points of view will generally lead to some progress in any situation.

The main point of discussing a certain topic is to gather different ideas from different points of view. As an example, when discussing methods to solve a particular problem, many different perspectives are needed in order to provide a better understanding of said problem. Of course, a better grasp of the problem from different viewpoints may lead to a better solution since a solution from the discussion may solve the problem in many different points of view. In contrast, a monotonous discussion from only a few perspectives may generally lead to an inefficient solution. Thus, inhibiting innovative solutions aside.

Progress may also be achieved as a result of a critique from a work colleague, a manager, or generally anyone who can critique the work of others. With a critique in one’s work, the person involved may evaluate and consider other alternatives in order to improve the work that has been critiqued. If the person involved can effectively improve the work that has been critiqued by someone with a contrasting opinion toward one’s work, progress tends to be guaranteed as it may give the person an insight to improvement of the work and also to provide other alternatives.

Though generally contrasting points of view may be beneficial in order to achieve progress, individual contemplations and evaluation is also needed. A significant contribution to the progress achieved when doing a certain task is achieved by individual contemplation and also some self-evaluation. Aside from that, by observing the world without from one’s point of view, said person may be provided additional insights into the work that is to be done. With the additional insights from self-observation, many insights of ideas may be acquired by the person and progress tends to be achieved.

Overall, in order to achieve progress, discussions with people with different points of views are needed. Although the discussions may provide additional insights and ideas, individual observation, evaluation, and contemplation is also needed to provide additional insights in order to progress.

[rayatheking]

“Thus, inhibiting innovative solutions aside.” - sentence seems incomplete 

Overall though your grammar seems good and your vocabulary is rich. However, the essay sounds a little repetitive, you’re just expressing the same idea using different words. Also, you should include some examples in the essay.