How do you ask a professor if he thinks that your social skills suck?

[InquilineKea]

Okay, so I pretty much have cases of Asperger's and ADD that are both more severe than 95% of college students with them. I'm often inadvertently impolite to people, I blurt things out, I get VERY excitable far too easily, my posture is horrible, and I interrupt people and say things very loudly. I'm so SCARED of seeing professors in the hallway because I fear that I'll react horribly, which has happened many times before (so I always stare at the floor or at the walls). And I'm practically incapable of making friends. I try to be grateful and I try to apologize a lot, but the end result is that I overuse "thanks" and I overuse apologies - to the point that they don't even have meaning anymore. I know that I can improve on those things, but it's hard when I have to focus all my effort on studying and research. My professors do seem to tolerate it, but who knows if they're becoming silently resentful at it. I've lost many friendships sharply and suddenly, after all.

So how do I approach my professor, asking if these issues might be a concern for him that show up on the LORs? Especially since bringing up these issues is quite uncomfortable for me.

I still want to go to grad school - professors (especially physical science ones) do seem to be more tolerant of this type of behavior than others, and politeness is often more about showing that you truly want to learn than about following any social convention. And nothing defines me more than my desire to learn.

Edited March 22, 2011 by InquilineKea