Freaking out. I hope I'm not the only one...

[ugg42]

I'm posting this in the Communication section specifically because I'd love to hear from people with similiar experience (or anxiety). Basically, the point of this post is because it's about 3 weeks before I begin my MA in comm studies with a teaching assistantship, and, well, my nervous moving jitters just turned into a full-blown anxiety.

From what I've heard, PhD TAs are normally the only ones "teaching", while MAs are left to grade assignments & observe. Apparently my program is different. I will be TEACHING 3 sections ( THREE!! EEK!) of a basic freshmen intro to comm course twice a week... with a professor only leading an online portion of the class (and the professor will NOT be in the room with me until an evaluation period at the end of the semester). I know I will have support, but I am far from being an expert in my field, and being thrown into a room with 20 students who are all going to be bored to tears with my ramblings is terrifying. Absolutely terrifying. I don't think of myself as boring, and, um, I have a degree in communication, so if I'm boring, there's something wrong. I have absolutely no fear of public speaking, rather, my fear is that malleable student minds are hanging on my every word, or that they're bored to death, which translates into horrible evaluations, which translates into my assistantship being taken away, which translates into no funding!

How on earth does one begin to manage being a student and a teacher at the same time? In prioritizing--which comes first? What do I say if someone asks me a question I don't know? What if my students know more than I do? What if I'm boring? I'm used to having above average grades-but with the added TA responsibility, what if my grades plummet? What if my students evaluate me poorly? What if, because of my low grades and my poor evaluations, I'm forced to drop out and repay my student loans immediately (with no job, of course), and have no other option but to live in a box in Northeast Ohio and freeze to death in a snowdrift?

Please help. Those who have been down this road before--how did you cope, and what are some things you wish someone had told you before you began grad student life? Those who are approaching the same scenario as me-- are you freaking out too? It's not that I'm looking for a pep talk, I supposed I'm just wondering how on earth anyone who survives all this still has hair left they haven't yet pulled out.

[edost]

During my MA, I was a TA in a statistics for PoliSci class, and I was no expert. The students whose other major was economics or psychology had already taken much more advanced statistics courses in those departments and often seemed to know more than I did. Here's what I've learned - if you don't know an answer, just say that you'll have to look into it to make sure, and really do look into it and give the answer a few days later. Don't make things up, for two reasons. One, the smart students will notice you're wrong. The other reason is that if they use what you said in a paper or test and get points deducted for it, they'll complain.

Now, it seems your situation is much better than mine. My only background in statistics was taking that same course as an undergrad a few years earlier. In your case, you have a whole degree on the subject under your belt. You'll probably get the hang of it pretty quickly. You'll also see how much time you need to dedicate to the TAship and how much to your own studies. I can't say how you should divide your time, since it is very different from person to person and from course to course.

[wtncffts]

This would be better posted in the 'Teaching' Subforum, since I don't think anything you ask about is specific to communications, though I certainly understand wanting to hear from students in the same field.

It's very common that MAs 'teach', i.e., lead discussion sections as well as grade. The opportunity to be the sole instructor for a course, if available, is usually reserved for PhD students, though. When I started as a TA, I didn't experience the same kinds of worries you relate, but I knew some who did, and it's perfectly natural. As edost said, if you don't know something, simply say you'll look into it, do so and get back to them. Noone expects you to be an expert; you're still a student after all. Moreover, in many programs you don't even get a choice of assignments; departments, by some process which seemed mystifying to me, slot people in seemingly arbitrarily. I don't know if this is true in your case, but TAs often end up teaching courses they have very little, even no, background in. It happened to me on my first TA assignment. Like edost, I was assigned to TA an intro course for which I had only ever done the intro undergrad course myself (at a different school). I know this isn't particularly useful advice, but you just do your best. Do the readings, know them well, and do the best you can to relate the ideas to the students.

Another thing is your worry about rambling and students being bored. This will depend on your program, the prof, and your own personal style, but it's possible, perhaps probably, that you won't be expected, or even encouraged, to 'lecture'. In every course where there's been a TA, either as an undergrad or myself, the purpose of the sections was to allow students opportunities to discuss the material. In other words, it's their forum, not yours as the TA. Your job is to guide the discussion in productive ways, interjecting when you need to to make sure the material is being treated as best as possible.

A few other things: it's possible some of the students will know more than you, but since it's an intro course, it's pretty unlikely. Remember, for most, if not all, of the students, this will be the first communications course they've ever taken, perhaps among the first university courses in general. And as edost said, if there are a few who seem to know more than you, so what? You're the TA. I'd say it might even make your job easier, in that there will be students able to help carry the discussion fruitfully. I wouldn't worry about evaluations as a TA. I have a warm coat; if you're going to freeze to death, I'd be happy to donate it

By the way, three sections is about right. At my MA institution, four sections was a 'full' TAship. I was pleasantly surprised that at my future program, two is considered a full assignment.