MHA SOP Feedback needed and appreciated, time sensitive.

[mangold]

Hi all, 

 

I am trying to limit this at 220 words and I am in bit of a time crunch, please see below:

 

 

"My interest in Health Administration initially stemmed from my father’s struggle with kidney cancer in 2006, and ultimately him succumbing to the disease in 2011. My family and I were fortunate to have compassionate Health Administration professionals that eased our family’s pain during my father’s difficult transition. I am inspired to increase my knowledge in Health Administration and extend the quality of care and professionalism that my father received to other patients and their families by focusing my efforts in Healthcare marketing and business development.

 

I would like to improve patient and healthcare consumer experience by developing engagement strategies while maintaining the hospitals’ brand.  Over the past 6 years at ABC Company, I have been highly effective in finding long term solutions in day to day operations as well as leading a team. In my current marketing role, I manage our social media efforts and public relations, while keeping our company’s brand and vision at the forefront.

 

  I envision my long term goal as Health facility marketing manager, serving as a hospital’s PR director, or in an acquisitions function in business development. Attending this graduate program would allow me to further mature my interpersonal and quantitative skills within the Health Administration sector by honing my existing marketing and public relations background.  I believe my personal, professional, and past educational experiences shape me into being the ideal graduate student to attend your MHA program at University of XYZ. "

 

I would appreciate any and all feedback, thanks in advance.

[deleongirl72]

Hi Decaf, I came across your post. I have started my application for an online Executive MHA program. I am at the part where I have to submit a SOP. This is always the challenging part besides the CV.

I wanted to know what the outcome was with your SOP and perhaps you can help me with any information, advise, suggestions etc.

Thank you.

Edited January 3, 2014 by deleongirl72