Grad school visit. Can I bring someone along?

[tovika]

I have been invited to visit with a faculty member and meet students for a graduate program. The faculty member said she could probably pay for my hotel. Would it be okay if someone else came with me just to split the driving time even though she is paying for the hotel? They would not be with me for the visit just to give me company on the drive.

[TakeruK]

I think the best thing to do is to ask the faculty member. If they are paying for a hotel room for just you, then having another person come along is probably fine because most hotels charge the same for one person as for two people. So, from the point of view of the faculty member, there is no extra costs, so I don't imagine there being a big problem. 

But, in many visits, prospective students share hotel rooms with another visiting student (not sure if you're visiting alone or with a large group). If this is the case, then there won't be a spot for the other person coming with you! So, one thing you can offer to do is ask that they provide you with your own hotel room and pay for half of the costs out of pocket (so that the cost to them is the same).

Finally, it does matter a little bit who the other person is. Does this person have an impact on your decision (e.g. is the person a partner, spouse, significant other, etc.?) I visited a few graduate programs with my spouse and I was always upfront about it. After all, this is a decision that affects both of us, so it's a decision we have equal say in, and whenever possible, my spouse visited the program/city the school is in. In almost every case where I mentioned that I would like my spouse to visit with me, they included my spouse in all of the social events where possible, so that my spouse could also experience the city and meet people living there. One school even gave my spouse a desk in an office so they could check email, take a break etc. in between their city-exploring while I met with professors. 

If this is not the case though (i.e. not a significant other or someone who would be involved in the decision) then I think explaining it the way you did here is fine too---you don't want to drive the long distance alone and the school doesn't have to make any plans for the other person, then it should be fine. 

I do think you should at least mention it to the faculty member because 1) if they are paying for your hotel room, I think it's the right thing to do to inform them that they are not just paying for you to use it, and 2) if the school is making the booking, then the hotel might want to know there's 2 people plus you want to make sure they are not already putting you with a roommate. If you really don't want to tell the school about the person traveling with you, then maybe finding the other person their own lodging is the best way forward.