I finally started practicing my AWA. Any input on this issue essay?

[Dedi]

First off, this is the first essay that I've written specifically for the AWA task. I went over the time, but that is not of importance at the moment. I just want to know that my quality of wiriting is decent and that my argument is relatively sound.

 

"People who hold high expectations for others are rewarded with high performance and respect."

 

Develop the response to the claim in which you provide specific reasons whether or not you agree with it. Focus specifically on the most powerful or compelling examples that could be used to support your position.

 

The argument is that people who hold high expectations for others are rewarded with high performance and respect. The main effect of putting high expectations on someone is to create more stress and pressure to do well. Therefore, there is a balancing act between high expectations improving performance and decreasing confidence. This delicate balance makes pushing high expectations not worth the risk of constant failure in some people.

 

First, mild stress from high expectations can cause people to perform at a high level. Studies have shown that mild stress improves cognition, boosts the immune system, and increases athletic ability. The reason for this is because when humans developed as a species there were physical dangers that required them to act and succeed in order to stay alive. Today, when people are mildly stressed, the improved cognition tends to be beneficial to performance.

 

On the other hand, too much stress from high expectations can cause others to make more mistakes and thereby decreasing performance and ruining confidence. Chronically stressed people have the opposite effect than those under mild stress: faltering cognition, worsened immune system, and weakened athletic ability. The decrease in cognitive ability causes the person to fail to do well. When the expectations are not met, confidence decreases.

 

Also, decreased confidence can decrease performance even more the next time they do the task. It ultimately becomes a downward spiral. Lowered self-esteem from decreased confidence can lower people’s expectations for themselves and therefore increase stress from high expectations. That increased stress worsens performance and decreases confidence even more.
 

In addition, different people have different thresholds for when stress becomes detrimental to performance. For example, people with trait anxiety will be more sensitive to stress. People with already low self-esteem are sensitive to stress. Those more resilient to stress and have coping skills are less sensitive to stress.

 

Ultimately, high expectations has a biphasic effect and it is not going to improve performance overall. Expectations are not a “one size fits all” concept. Therefore, expecting people to do very well on a task will cause some people to achieve and others to fail.

[Vene]

I will admit this is my thoughts without even reading the essay, but is this actually something worth spending time on if you're applying to neuroscience programs?

[Dedi]

I'm not exactly trying to achieve a high score, but I don't want a score of 2. Is a score of 2 really hard if you're trying?

[Vene]

A 2 would be incredibly impressive, albeit in the bad way.

[Dedi]

Haha. Okay, then I'm not too worried. Thanks for your input!

[vicky25]

I had scored a 2.6 something about 4 years ago in the GRE exam. Yes AWA can be tough for non native speakers.