Pressure to decide?

[TheDecider]

Hi GradCafe, I've got a waitlist dilemma. School A has accepted me, and offered me a very generous fellowship. School B is probably a better fit for me, and is currently my first choice, but I am still on their waitlist (though my potential PI said I'm at the top). School A says they will rescind their fellowship offer if I do not accept soon (i.e. next few days) so they can offer it to someone else.

 

Is it fair to ask school A to wait until I get a decision from school B? School B hasn't given me a firm timeline, and I would be crushed to lose A's fellowship opportunity, but at the same time I do feel like I could be happier at school B.

[Eternal Student]

I far as I know, you are allowed to wait until April 15 to give your final decision. It is natural that institutions pressure candidates to decide (I am on the same boat), but I do not believe is legal to revoke the terms of an acceptance to pressure a decision prior to the legal date. 

[TheDecider]

Thanks Eternal Student, actually looking back at what they told me it isn't clear if they would officially rescind the fellowship. It was separate from the official offer letter (email from the dept head) though, so perhaps it would be legal for them to retract that part of the package?

 

The other issue is that I have a close relationship with the PI at A, and he told me if I don't accept soon he may lose out on getting any grad students this year, so I feel extra guilt about that, and I don't want to risk souring the relationship.

[MathCat]

I far as I know, you are allowed to wait until April 15 to give your final decision. It is natural that institutions pressure candidates to decide (I am on the same boat), but I do not believe is legal to revoke the terms of an acceptance to pressure a decision prior to the legal date. 

I don't think there's any question of legality here... they can do what they want. The program may not have even signed on to the April 15 resolution.

 

This is a hard situation. I suggest being honest about the situation with your PI so he doesn't have false hopes or anything like that. But don't burn bridges either, as you may not get that waitlist offer.

[Eternal Student]

I don't think there's any question of legality here... they can do what they want. The program may not have even signed on to the April 15 resolution.

 

This is a hard situation. I suggest being honest about the situation with your PI so he doesn't have false hopes or anything like that. But don't burn bridges either, as you may not get that waitlist offer.

Well, although I am not a lawyer, I was told by my supervisor and by faculty at other institutions were I was accepted, that they cannot force anyone to decide before the legal date. If April 15 is a "word in paper" legal date, I don't know, but forcing a decision before that it seems to be ethically questionable. 

[Eternal Student]

Thanks Eternal Student, actually looking back at what they told me it isn't clear if they would officially rescind the fellowship. It was separate from the official offer letter (email from the dept head) though, so perhaps it would be legal for them to retract that part of the package?

 

The other issue is that I have a close relationship with the PI at A, and he told me if I don't accept soon he may lose out on getting any grad students this year, so I feel extra guilt about that, and I don't want to risk souring the relationship.

I understand. It is tricky, indeed.

With whom do you feel you would work better: supervisor A or B? Empathy is very important for a long term commitment such as this. Also, you probably want to consider which city/town fits better your personality and budget. These things are usually not taken seriously, but they make all the difference. If you do not feel comfortable at the place you live in or with you working environment, your work will certainly reflect that. Do you feel you could benefit from more experience before the Ph.D.? The answer to this question might also help you decide between doing the master's or going to the Ph.D. right away.

[TheDecider]

I don't think there's any question of legality here... they can do what they want. The program may not have even signed on to the April 15 resolution.

 

This is a hard situation. I suggest being honest about the situation with your PI so he doesn't have false hopes or anything like that. But don't burn bridges either, as you may not get that waitlist offer.

 

I agree, I'm being as honest as I can with both schools. I know both schools have signed the April 15 resolution, but I don't know if it's more of a guideline or what. FWIW, it looks like it applies to fellowships:

 

 

April 15 Resolution

Resolution Regarding Graduate Scholars, Fellows, Trainees and Assistants

Acceptance of an offer of financial support* (such as a graduate scholarship, fellowship, traineeship, or assistantship) for the next academic year by a prospective or enrolled graduate student completes an agreement that both student and graduate school expect to honor. In that context, the conditions affecting such offers and their acceptance must be defined carefully and understood by all parties.

Students are under no obligation to respond to offers of financial support prior to April 15; earlier deadlines for acceptance of such offers violate the intent of this Resolution. In those instances in which a student accepts an offer before April 15, and subsequently desires to withdraw that acceptance, the student may submit in writing a resignation of the appointment at any time through April 15. However, an acceptance given or left in force after April 15 commits the student not to accept another offer without first obtaining a written release from the institution to which a commitment has been made. Similarly, an offer by an institution after April 15 is conditional on presentation by the student of the written release from any previously accepted offer. It is further agreed by the institutions and organizations subscribing to the above Resolution that a copy of this Resolution or a link to the URL should accompany every scholarship, fellowship, traineeship, and assistantship offer.

 

 

 

 

I understand. It is tricky, indeed.

With whom do you feel you would work better: supervisor A or B? Empathy is very important for a long term commitment such as this. Also, you probably want to consider which city/town fits better your personality and budget. These things are usually not taken seriously, but they make all the difference. If you do not feel comfortable at the place you live in or with you working environment, your work will certainly reflect that. Do you feel you could benefit from more experience before the Ph.D.? The answer to this question might also help you decide between doing the master's or going to the Ph.D. right away.

 

Those factors are some of what's driving my preference for B. From living in both places, I can say B is a much better fit for me geographically and culturally. I know I'd work well with advisor A, but I enjoyed my interviews with B and her students spoke very highly of her.

 

[GeoDUDE!]

The CGS resolution to have April 15th as a deadline is not legally binding. It is voluntary and schools who have signed it are not bound to it. Think of it like the UN.

[TheDecider]

The CGS resolution to have April 15th as a deadline is not legally binding. It is voluntary and schools who have signed it are not bound to it. Think of it like the UN.

 

That actually may help, I was worried B wouldn't take A's early deadline seriously if A couldn't legally enforce it.