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seriously_stressed

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  1. I'm in my first semester of my PhD and the administration is such a headache that I'm thinking of quitting the program. I could name a laundry list of issues, but by far the most important is health insurance. I was told I would have it by October, but I'm still waiting. My partner, who has a serious medical condition, relocated with me and is also waiting for insurance. Because of my partner's condition, we were very proactive in communicating our concerns about health insurance before accepting the offer to come here. The program office was very responsive, gave us all the brochures and assured us of the coverage we'd have. The coverage is pretty generous for a student plan, which satisfied us at decision time. But we don't have this insurance yet and I don't know when we will. The program office is now telling me they will check "in January" to see where things stand. We've been fronting medical costs for months - expenses we didn't plan for, and can't afford. I feel pretty angry, as does my partner, and I fear the stress is affecting my partner's health (and probably mine). The other first year students also do not have insurance, but while they seem annoyed, none seem as affected by this delay as I am. I have spoken to my advisor, who helped me get the program office to reply to my emails (they'd been ignoring me for weeks). Still, my advisor can't make the insurance happen and as a result, I'm not sure how helpful it is (or how good for impression management) if I continue to bring it up. In addition, I haven't told my advisor or the school about my partner's condition because my partner does not want anyone here to know. My pressure on them for coverage makes it seem like I'm simply neurotic. I feel so frustrated. It has been hard for me to focus on my coursework with this stress. I feel like the program administrators are indirectly worsening my partner's health and I'm starting to resent them. My partner and I have talked about leaving, but we'd face the costs of relocation and my PhD application process all over again. We keep hoping that tomorrow, the next day, or next week, we'll get the information we've been waiting for, but we really have no idea. At the same time, I have completely lost faith in my program's administration, and a PhD is a long time. If anyone has faced a similar situation, or has any advice, I'd be most grateful.
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