I have nowhere else to turn to, and I've gotten great advice with grad cafe before, so I'm hoping to get some great advice again. Here goes nothing...
So, I've known my college roommate for three years. We've always gotten along great. However, she got a boyfriend 6 months ago and our living situation has turned into an unbearable one. We share an apartment on campus, so I'm thankful for my own bedroom and bathroom. My roommate's boyfriend though has been over every single night of the semester. He never leaves, except to go to class. He stays the night once a week, which is ok, but coming over every single day and staying till 12am regardless? I can't stand it. Besides, there are cleaning issues: I take care of our living room and kitchen and she never cleans it. There are others, but they're another story.
I've been keeping my mouth shut for months and I finally talked to her about the situation. I told her he was over way too much, and that I missed just coming home and hanging out with her like we used to. I said that I missed her. She responded, saying sorry and that she knew right away when they started dating that it bothered me a lot that he was over all the time, but he's her "soulmate" and that she honestly would rather spend time with him over anyone else. She ended it then with "I hope there's no hard feelings." I said back that I understand what it's like to be in a relationship (I have a 2+ year relationship with my own boyfriend), but you can't forget your friends when you're in a relationship. However, she said she couldn't spend time with me knowing that her own boyfriend's presence bothered me (like wtf?) I repeatedly told her that I liked her boyfriend (it's true!), but that I just missed spending time with just her. She then stated that it's hard to spend time with me anyway since my boyfriend is over all the time anyhow (umm no, he works during the week, so there are definitely some nights he is not around). I got fed up and stopped talking to her after that. I went to hang out with some friends (used to be her friends as well) to blow off some steam. When I came home later that night, she had bolted our front door on me. When you bolt the front door in our apartment even our keys won't open it. I pounded on the door repeatedly until she opened it and when I did, I found her and her boyfriend (as usual) just watching TV in her bedroom. I brushed past her, slammed my bedroom door and remained there for the rest of the night. Now I don't know what to do anymore. I'm angry, frustrated, tired, everything. I can't move out for a few months because of the lease and he can't sublease off me. She can't stay with him because he lives with his parents. I feel like she just came up with every excuse to try to turn the tables on me, to make it look like it's my own fault we don't hang out.
