monkeybrains

Its a big lab. 
 
But really, big help everyone.

I hate to resort to saying this but at this point I am almost certain that your d*****bag attitude was part of the reason that prevented you from getting into any grad programs in the first place. Even if you get admitted somewhere, I truly feel sorry for the advisor who will have to bear with a truly immature and a hostile person like you for two or more years (or even less, if the advisor decides he/she cannot handle a disrespectful student like you any longer).

Oh and for the record, we have read past OP, but since you love treating others' advice as a series of useless junk, reprimands are what you'll hear for the most of the part at this point.

People put considerable time and effort into giving advice, whether you think they did or not. They took time to type something they thought you would find helpful. Calling them out for not saying what you want makes people less likely to give you constructive advice. How would you feel if you took the time to read 6 pages, gave your thoughts, and then OP basically told you it was useless??

It's similar to lab stuff. You slave over some data, hand it to your PI, and then they go "haha, this is awful!" It's not a good feeling and makes the person less likely to put that much time in again.

You've also named some professors by name, so you could reasonably be identified by someone. What you post on the Internet can and will come back to haunt you. Being rude to people on the Internet is the same as in real life.

/end rant

You live, learn, and lurk.
 
Still, is it hard to read past the OP? its only 6 pages.

Just an FYI, when you ask for advice on the Internet, you open yourself up to helpful and not so helpful suggestions. Pointing out the ones you don't find helpful makes you seem extremely rude. If you only want advice from certain people, ask them. Don't post an open thread.

Thank you for reiterating stuff brought up at the very beginning of the thread.
 
 
 
 
Right now, I've started applying to MS programs in Biology and Bioinformatics but I'm still looking for program suggestions (and a real thanks to people who actually did). Correct me if i'm wrong, an MS degree in biological sciences is my best option right now if I want to get to (any sort of, but not top tier) PhD program in neuroscience. Thus, the plan is to apply to as many as possible for Fall 2015, and I'll sort it out if anyone will take me. From what I gather, even if its just coursework, an MS should (but not always will) help improve a really bad undergrad GPA. 
 
For everyone who've posted here, while I appreciate this shower of cold hard truth, I think you guys are getting sick of me. So I hope that soon, when the results are in, there will be other people who will come here to get the same great advice on what to do when all your efforts applying to PhD programs goes through the toilet bowl.
 
I'll update when I get my last rejections, when I do find a program, or when you need guys some easy rep on this forum.

There's one next weekend, and then the third weekend of February. They sent out interview invites a while back (maybe a month ago?). They were asking everyone to book their tickets/request interviews by last week. 

Yo Ted, I didn't reply when you started this conversation in the other thread, but now you are starting it again. Why on earth do you feel compelled to have this conversation? We know its competitive, so leave it at that. Does it make you feel better to make others worry like crazy? I didn't even apply to any of the programs you are referring to, but I find this repetitive post irritating as heck. 
 
Can we agree to stick to positive posts since we are all pulling our hair out anyway? We know its a tough game. 

I'm just explaining the situation. We are adults, presumably, and a ton of people are freaking out over UCSF. I'm trying to rationalize to these people that you shouldn't freak out over this because it is extremely competitive and it's pointless to worry over something like that. As I wrote before, be happy for those accepted, and proud if you get in anywhere you applied. Be positive, and stop the nervousness, it riles up everyone else like a herd of Buffaloes that see a lion.

I did exactly the same thing. I've been kind of ashamed so I haven't posted a stats thing haha.

For MIT BCS.
Although, you are right about last year, it seems like it is going to be later this year. I got an email on Dec 4th (and I guess all applicants did) saying this:
"All submitted applications will be reviewed in December and January.  Interview invitations will be sent in January.  Interviews will take place in late February by invitation only.  Initial decisions will be sent in mid March.  Final decisions will be sent in late March."
 
I'm also applying to UCLA and am super stressed thinking that the first round of invites will probably be this weekend!!!

For anyone applying to Brown (neuro), Cornell (comp. biology), MIT (bcs), and UCLA (neuro):
 
After trawling through some of the results from past years, interview invites (some but not all) have occurred in the third week of December, around Dec. 14-19 (sorry if this adds to your anxiety...)

It's really not a research proposal. You're not going to review previous literature or propose methods and a design for a study. The goal is to talk intelligibly about a research question or subfield that interests you. I think that good SOPs are able to articulate a particular interest with some amount of detail and also convey to the reader why they should care about this question. If you can't formulate a question or set of questions at the moment, you should still be able to define some specific areas or topics that appeal to you and explain why, even if you don't know what's the cutting edge research being done there now. You should still be able to tell us why we should care about whatever it is you want to study and what's exciting about it (to you). Conveying this kind of information about your research interests will show the adcom that you actually understand what you're getting into and that you have made an informed choice when you decided to apply to their program.