twentysix

Yeah, I'm sure he/she doesn't care at all. People on grad cafe are way too high strung about little mistakes.

I was surprised most that I received acceptances. I was told that I wouldn't get in to any of the schools I chose to apply too by faculty at my current school (though one faculty member was supportive). I guess they didn't realize the amount of time I put into hand selecting the programs, revising my statement of purpose, etc...

Wow, your profile photo is offensive.

Forgive me for being a little rude, but for being so "eye opening" you haven't really read my post. I never commented on what MOST people are doing in this thread, but what particular set of people are doing.
 
its really disheartening that you aren't taking the time to listen(read) to whoever's points. I don't blame you, victorydance hasn't been the most eloquent or nice in his responses. I probably wouldn't bother responding to him either. I'm pretty shocked that I'm responding to you to be honest, because short of "f****", you have been just as dogmatic. And maybe your right, but it really doesn't matter, because I wouldn't call this conversation civil at this point. Point your fingers at whoever you want.
 
And when did I ever state the world is fair and unbiased? In fact I said the opposite, and have been worried that in our attempts to create a balance we end up creating a society with a different imbalance, as evident by your vitriol. That we have to think critically of what we should and should not assume, because a world where we assume that everyone here is out to hurt us is the kind of world we read about in dystopian books. 
 
And while I realize that women might take the crown for the most discriminated group of people in history, and at present, I am no stranger to discrimination. I am just offering some thoughts, because my particular group of people have had a lot of trouble getting past that, and our country (Israel) falls into these problems all the time. Yeah, I just made that comparison, its not 100% equivalent, but the mentality is strikingly similar. 
 
I refuse to live in a world where I think everyone is evil. Maybe that is my "privilege" as a male or whatever. Perhaps I need to be checked.

I'm really hoping, that victorydance is just doing a lousy job describing a situation that requires a bunch of nuance (hahaha, a bunch of nuance, what an oxymoron). I don't think any educated person can say that gender discrimination, especially against women, is not a problem. What I have tried to suggest, and maybe victorydance ( I hope), is that when you start to assume a scatter plot trend (ie, the instances when there is discrimination) applies to every particular situation. I realize that this is a burden, and on online forums we can take stronger stances with less fear of consequences, but that assumption init of itself is discrimination. 
 
A group of X attacks people. Every time someone sees an X, he/she thinks they will be attacked, when in fact, the majority of the time X's do not attack. 
 
Thats when we get the patriot act.

You might want to tone down the "bunch of women". I think there is some truth in what you are saying about this thread, but I am not sure this is a productive way of communicating that. 

I think there is a lot of really sloppy logic in this thread. I find some of the responses offensive in their vitriol, especially considering what both my mother and aunt had to go through.  The enemy of knowledge and critical thinking is the assumption of knowing in itself; when you think you know you stop thinking. A postmodern conundrum. 
 
To be clear, wanting to be around people you find attractive no way means that you disqualify other attributes. The large assumption you all made is that just because in my situation I chose the cute TA in my case, because she was cute, does not mean I completely disqualify other attributes to build my preferences.
 
Which is the more reasonable assumption, that because the cute TA is hired by the university I  think she is qualified for her job as a base or that an educated man would choose to ask questions of someone who is completely unqualified on the basis of their looks?  You all forget that both have the same job, so both should be equally qualified to do their job. ALL other observations are subjective. 
 
As a male, who has TAed for 3 years, I've been uncomfortable for many reasons. Whenever I am uncomfortable because a student is out of line, I let them know. I know there are societal pressures on women that there aren't on men, but lets be clear: I've had few cases were a student has shut the door on my office and has made completely inappropriate comments to me. It happens to everyone.
 
There is an implication from the responses to my question: that just because someone is uncomfortable it means that person causing it should stop. There would be solid ground for that implication if even a polarity of women TAs felt that every time they got male students asking them questions, it was because of their looks. But how can we know this? And how do we not know that some women don't mind, or a majority of women don't mind? How do we know that every woman thinks of it this way?
 
If a student goes up to a female TA and says "oh your the cute TA, so i'll ask you questions", that is unquestionably sexual harassment. Preferences are  not this case. Being unprofessional and having preferences are two different things. And my thoughts are my own. She might make assumptions about my reasons, but I have no control over that in reality. I have no idea what assumptions she's making unless she voices them.  Some people are more insecure about things than others. I get that. I just don't see the logic against what most people already do anyway, even if they aren't willing to be honest. 

I don't think stereotypes and situation I described is the same. And to be clear just because you find someone attractive does not mean you 1) flirt with them or 2) try and make them feel uncomfortable in anyway. It just means your attracted to them (cute) and thats part of life.  Maybe I'm the only one who likes to be around people I find attractive, when given a choice, and I've just learned a valuable lesson.  Its better that I learned it here then in a place that has real consequences. 

I was surprised most that I received acceptances. I was told that I wouldn't get in to any of the schools I chose to apply too by faculty at my current school (though one faculty member was supportive). I guess they didn't realize the amount of time I put into hand selecting the programs, revising my statement of purpose, etc...

Oh, well that's a bummer, but understandable. Sounds like you have a busy trip ahead of you! Are you going to drive or take the train? If you drive, it's about 2 hours (but the 405 and the 5 get lots of traffic), but otherwise not a bad drive. I heard the train route down to San Diego from Union Station is quite nice (you get a nice view of the ocean  ). 

I was surprised most that I received acceptances. I was told that I wouldn't get in to any of the schools I chose to apply too by faculty at my current school (though one faculty member was supportive). I guess they didn't realize the amount of time I put into hand selecting the programs, revising my statement of purpose, etc...

I didn't make the 1st round either. It looks like we got an almost identical email. I replied to his email, but I haven't heard back yet. It would be nice to get the fellowship, but we shall see.

cad systems

I was surprised most that I received acceptances. I was told that I wouldn't get in to any of the schools I chose to apply too by faculty at my current school (though one faculty member was supportive). I guess they didn't realize the amount of time I put into hand selecting the programs, revising my statement of purpose, etc...

Keep it professional & brief: just tell the emailing professor that you don't think their project matches your research interests. You don't need to justify anything to them, it's enough to say No Thanks. Thank them for their time and wish them luck in finding a suitable student, that's all the politeness you need.

Got my decision, I had an inclination that it was going to be a rejection. Guess I'm one step closer going to UCSD now (not that I'm complaining

My girlfriend is currently finishing her MA in English (composition) at NDSU with a teaching assistantship if you have any questions that she can answer. 

Yes, you'll need a winter coat when it's winter. However, you can buy one once you get here. In late August/early September, it'll be in the high 90s. It's not always winter. 
 
2 bedroom apartments are between $500-$700, depending on the area. If you don't care about living close to campus, look for apartments in South Fargo. The commute is 15-30 minutes, but the apartments are much newer. I live in an old triplex near campus and it's crappy/cheap. It depends on the quality of apartment that you are looking for. The apartments around campus are older except for T-Lofts (http://www.roers.com/t-loft-apartments/home), a new complex South of campus. It's overpriced though. I know many grad students who live in T-Lofts their first year (for convenience) and then move to other parts of the city. There are also apartment buildings further south of campus (on College Street) that are newer. Also, there are newly built, 3 story town homes within walking distance of campus for $1100/month. 
 
For on-campus apartments, the Niskanen apartments are newer and located in the University Village area NE of campus. There is a bus that continually takes students from University Village to campus. The apartments that are labeled "University Village" are older/cheaper and in the same area. However, mainly international students seem to live in those. 
 
Downtown Fargo has been revitalized within the last 10 years. There are unique restaurants and shops. Also, there is a rather large bar scene downtown. We have at least 3 small breweries in Fargo/Moorhead. The art community is growing too. It's a nice place to live, except for the terrible temperatures in the winter and the humidity in the summer. However, every place has something that sucks about it. 
 
On the plus side, NDSU also has a great football team (4 consecutive D1 national championships) and is an R1 university. 

Yes, you'll need a winter coat when it's winter. However, you can buy one once you get here. In late August/early September, it'll be in the high 90s. It's not always winter. 
 
2 bedroom apartments are between $500-$700, depending on the area. If you don't care about living close to campus, look for apartments in South Fargo. The commute is 15-30 minutes, but the apartments are much newer. I live in an old triplex near campus and it's crappy/cheap. It depends on the quality of apartment that you are looking for. The apartments around campus are older except for T-Lofts (http://www.roers.com/t-loft-apartments/home), a new complex South of campus. It's overpriced though. I know many grad students who live in T-Lofts their first year (for convenience) and then move to other parts of the city. There are also apartment buildings further south of campus (on College Street) that are newer. Also, there are newly built, 3 story town homes within walking distance of campus for $1100/month. 
 
For on-campus apartments, the Niskanen apartments are newer and located in the University Village area NE of campus. There is a bus that continually takes students from University Village to campus. The apartments that are labeled "University Village" are older/cheaper and in the same area. However, mainly international students seem to live in those. 
 
Downtown Fargo has been revitalized within the last 10 years. There are unique restaurants and shops. Also, there is a rather large bar scene downtown. We have at least 3 small breweries in Fargo/Moorhead. The art community is growing too. It's a nice place to live, except for the terrible temperatures in the winter and the humidity in the summer. However, every place has something that sucks about it. 
 
On the plus side, NDSU also has a great football team (4 consecutive D1 national championships) and is an R1 university.