In the words of Flavor Flav: “Don’t believe the hype.” Contrary to what ‘Double Shot’ has said Oxford is a horrible place to live and an even worse place to work. The Oxford Union is an anachronistic, chauvinist, elitist uncomfortable place where once in a while some anachronistic debates will take place. You will pay a ton of money to sit in a stuffy room and maybe get to see Shakira give a motivational speech. The only “ethnic restaurants” are in Cowley – apart from that you are looking at disgusting overpriced pub food and crusty sandwiches. There are many pubs but they all close at 11 and are outrageously overpriced. The “gorgeous parks” are all private and you will not have access to them unless you are part of that college. 12 foot high walls, barbed wire, electric fences and other security systems will ensure that you cannot benefit from the parks– you won’t be able to walk on the grass at most of them even if you manage to sneak inside. There is the University parks which shuts at sundown but it is a soulless boring park. As for the school itself – expect no contact with faculty members and a horrifyingly frustrating bureaucratic system. Your study spaces, while they may appear beautiful on brochures, will in fact be disgusting buildings gutted and “renovated” in the 1970s: many will be filled with black mold and/or asbestos. I’m not kidding – ASBESTOS! The libraries will all have inconvenient hours, shut very early and will be shut for an entire month when you are right in the middle of your dissertation.