Thanks again for the response. Okay, how is this. Italics are not part of the paragraph:
I was always a bright student. From ------ high school (super prestigious high school), I enrolled in the -----prestigious program----- (that I ultimately got kicked out from) at ------ College with free tuition and prodigious scholarships. I finished my first 40 credits with a 3.7 GPA while participating in extra curricular 1 in the fall, extra curricular 2 in the spring and extra curricular 3. And during the beginning of my darkest depressive episode, I gathered the courage to finish my last 20 credits with a 3.50. I'd rather not make excuses for what happened to my grades in between, but I was ignorant, immature and also lacked the fortitude to handle my mood episodes effectively.
The next two paragraphs, I explain my mood symptoms, treatment and experiences being arrested and hospitalized.
My closing paragraph is:
I didn't write this essay to invoke pity or divert responsibility, because I would like to be judged by my merit and ability. It has taken years of failures and effort to finally get my act together and manage my illness. I've encountered many mentally ill people throughout my experience, and I can say that I am fortunate for many reasons. I don't want to squander my talent with meaningless pursuits or inaction. My aim is to fully utilize my potential in public health, preferably psychiatric epidemiology, so that I can benefit society.
Should I mention that I can't travel outside my city, so I'm limited in options of MPH programs to apply to? That's basically saying, "I'm not applying anywhere else, accept me and I'll enroll." Is that bad?
Should I mention that I want to go to a particular school because they have classes specific to psychiatric epidemiology? Or that they are affiliated with many research centers linked to psychiatry or psychology?
I'd like to go to Columbia's Mailman SOPH. Their average GPA and GRE scores were 3.4 and 581 V - 671 Q.
Enrolled vs. Accepted vs. Applied is 516 to 1254 to 2015
My GPA is 2.66 (B.S. in Math), and I'm scoring on the GRE practice exams ~500-600 V and ~700 Q. Thanks.