lynx

Thanks for this thread! I've been feeling really down lately as well, and it's nice to know that I'm not alone (although I'm sorry to hear you've been feeling this way!) I've just been feeling lonely, and more insecure than I've ever felt in my life. I thought I was comfortable with who I am, but it's almost like I'm 13 again, and I just want to be cool and fit in. It's strange because everyone I've met here has been really nice, but I'm so hypersensitive to any signs of social rejection that I keep worrying that people are just being nice to me to be polite. One minute I feel great, and like I fit in and things might be okay, and then the next I feel so bad, and like I will never have any friends here. Every little problem reduces me to tears. I know my parents and friends from home would want me to talk to them about how I'm feeling, but I am reluctant to do that, because I don't want them to be upset and worry about me. I worry that they would feel they can't help me because they're so far away. It's weird because I've waited so long to get here, and I've been looking forward to being a grad student for a long time, but now that I'm here I feel terrible. I probably should have expected this because of the huge change and long distance from home. I know it will get better, but right now it's no fun.