pullingthrough

Thanks so much for your thoughts, TakeruK. It's really nice that you took the time to think through these ideas and write them all out. I'm not in the sciences, so the skills I'm taking away aren't as clear, but I gleaned important lessons from your suggestions. Thanks again!

Hi everyone, Thank you so much to those of you who took the time to reply and share your thoughts. I think these tips will be very helpful, for myself and hopefully others as well. I realized that I did not phrase my question very clearly. I'm looking for advice on how to maintain contentment and confidence while finishing a very long, underwhelming project. I actually have a fairly workable system for moving forward productively - word quotas, section goals, deadlines with advisers, etc. At this point, I'm moving along faster-than-average in my department and am scheduled to finish my dissertation on time, if not a bit early. So, I am finishing at a reasonable pace. The problem is that the work has proven really difficult to get through with my professional and personal self-esteem in tact. I work all day on a project that has failed, in many ways, and I am certainly not in love with it. I'm almost positive I won't end up in an academic career. So, at the end of the day, any accomplishment seem difficult to measure. I'm committed to finishing, but the process can be really taxing. My adviser is responsive - a trait I know is rare and that I appreciate. But, his feedback is intense and negative. So, I'm working diligently but know that completing a chapter is going to result in another round of very, very humbling criticism and instructions to rewrite entirely. I've been doing this for about a year and find it difficult to keep my head above water. Even while knowing that I will leave academia, I find that my confidence as a student and professional has suffered significantly. I've been doing volunteer work, exercising, and exploring non-academic career tracks to keep my mind focused on the end game. These have helped. Still, I am wondering if those in similar circumstances have found other ways of maintaining confidence and self-esteem. Did you get any particularly wonderful advice from a sympathetic mentor? Have you found a particular activity helpful in proving your worth outside of graduate school? I realize that I'm very lucky to have had the opportunities I did and do not mean to sound overly negative. I just hope that some more seasoned readers might know of some tips to push through the mental tolls of dissertating.

Hi all, I've received some excellent advice on The Grad Cafe regarding my difficulties with my social sciences/humanities PhD program and interest in non-academic work. After several years of struggling, I'm trying to finish my dissertation and move on. I have a few rough chapters under my belt and a rough schedule of what drafts and revisions I need to get done in order to progress as planned. My question is: what tips or work-arounds have you used to ease the difficulty of actually finishing your dissertation? I'm particularly interested in help from those who weren't feeling so in love with their project by the time they got to the writing phase, or those who overcame the psychological aspects of producing what feels like mediocre work. I can force myself to get a certain amount done every day. But, I still feel pretty bad about myself and my work at the end of the day. Did anyone find a solution to the sense of despair, lack of accomplishment, or loss of confidence from finishing something that you don't feel great about? Thank you for any ideas.

Thanks again for all the great advice. I've spent some time on Versatile PhD and Beyond Academe and both have definitely given me some ideas. I think that I'll speak with one of the career counselors at my school regarding dual-degree program possibilities that would steer me towards nonacademic jobs, or at least help me look competitive with people that didn't take 6 years (or more) out of their work history. And perhaps speaking with a few people that have made similar transitions will help me understand how to approach this delicate situation with my professors. Thanks again for all of the advice.

Hi Everyone, Thanks for all of this advice. While Strangelight is right--I am, at this point, trying to figure out if and how to leave my program rather than how to survive the next 4-5 years--I appreciate the tips about exercise and counseling. I actually have gone to a counselor about my depression in grad school, and doing so has made me realize that this really simply may not be for me. But it's great advice and I appreciate everyone's inputs. Strangelight, I know you are right: my degree may be useful to my career whether or not I become a professor. Ideally, I think that I would put myself in a situation where I was doing a dissertation geared toward a non-academic career with the blessings of my advisers, while also spending my summers or something interning/working/training for a non-professorial job. But I worry about my professors' possible reactions. I don't fear them being dismissive so much as being less inclined to serve on a committee, give as much time, etc., to someone leaving the field (I can see them thinking: What's the point?). Perhaps its an unreasonable fear, but I wonder what I would do in their shoes.... In any case, I really appreciate your insights and your stories about those who have left in your field. If you don't mind me asking: do you keep up with them? Are they happy / successful? Are they happy with their decision? Thanks again for your help.

Hi everyone, I am dealing with what I know is a somewhat common problem among doctoral students: loss of motivation, energy, etc. I am finishing up coursework in my program and will soon be pulling together my exams committee, but after I qualify, I will undertake another 3-4 long years of dissertation writing and research. I am in a social science field at a top-ranked university and have been been fortunate enough to receive fellowships and awards, in addition to the enthusiastic mentoring by dedicated advisers. But I find long days spent reading, writing, and researching difficult, and I often come home barely able to beat back tears because my life feels so detached from anything concrete and my work often feels meaningless. I thought I went into this field with eyes wide open because many of my friends were advanced graduate students, and I had seen them go through the difficulties of qualifying exams, research, grant-writing, and dissertation-writing. But I didn't anticipate the feeling of insignificance that would come with years of doing the abstract, intangible work of research and reading. My recently-conceived dissertation project excites me and my advisers and I feel it is relevant work, but when I think that all it will come to is a book that few will read, published more than 10 years from now (if I'm lucky) and that I may spend years in precarious, low-paying lectureships, I feel hopeless. Watching the advanced graduate students in my department go through the unpredictable, exhausting, discouraging process of job searches leaves me incredibly depressed. I used to think that I wanted to become a professor, but given my reaction to the first few years of academic work, I realize that it is not the right career for me. I am trying to decide how I should go about leaving academia, and when. I am 28, and have had skilled, full-time positions before, but given the state of the economy and the fact that I am two years out of the workforce, I don't have illusions that finding rewarding work would be easy. I'm trying to decide if I should try to finish orals, and then take a leave of absence to find work; try to find a suitable position over the summer (at great cost to my research plans); or stick it out and try to at least embark upon my dissertation while interning or working part time in a position that could hopefully turn into full time work (hopefully in government or a non-profit associated with my field). I think that given my interests, the best compromise would be to get a professional masters degree, but I hesitate to again apply for and enter graduate school given my experience thus far. I was relatively happy as a beginning professional, and I look forward to doing collaborative work, with structured time, deadlines, and tangible goals. I also am confused about how to ask for help (if at all) from advisers or other professors at school. I'm sorry this is long-winded. I would appreciate any insights or advice from those with similar experiences or knowledge of such transitions.