What's worse: getting rejected from your top school, or getting in but can't attend?

[boo]

This whole agrument is bad. Every field has different expectations. In some fields you dont do it without funding based on the programs. However some other programs it is expected not to get funding. Not to mention the fact you can only have funding the first two years anyways since you are expected to go off and do your research on your own in some fields and cant fulfill the obligations of teaching, ta or research assistant. As for the field MA in education alot of programs are vicious to their prespective grad schools thus they are sometimes referred to nothing but cash cows. Also, at a top school out of my field I know for a fact all first year phd students dont get funding. And after that only one of all of them gets it each year and you must compete every year for it. But the program is a top program and they have their pick of students so they don't need to give them. PHD programs are all about your advisor and what you did in it. Not rankings from the early 90's. So in a way if you have a ga its taking time away from your own research and thus putting you behind the 8 ball. So before you make a general statement about phd must get funding, make sure to examine all fields and not just your field or your situation. Some advisors yes it matters and their ga get special treatment but not all advisors and it can even vary from advisor to advisor in the same program and the same school. So do your homework and find out if it matters. If it does dont go without funding, if it doesnt matter and your even given other perks by not having funding and you can afford it chose that one.

[breakfast]

Another reason funding is so important for PhD students is the teaching or research experience that comes with it. A stipend is in return for doing something - most often teaching. If you go through an entire PhD program without funding, you likely won't have any teaching experience, which makes finding a job even harder than it already is (especially for those in the humanities).

I wouldn't have been able to go to graduate school without funding. I was very fortunate that I was offered a funded MA, which seems to be pretty rare in my field, especially in the last few years. Not only does the funding make it possible for me to go to graduate school, but it also makes me feel wanted and welcome in the department.

[sunshinepuppies]

The worst thing is getting waitlisted! One month of cruel and unusual punishment. What did we do to deserve it!

[Jae B.]

This is an issue for many people, I'm sure.

I'm currently equally in love with two schools, one being my undergrad alma mater, the other a great opportunity for something totally new. I don't know which is my top school anymore, and only wish I could attend both -- not possible.

I certainly didn't expect both schools to accept me, and never anticipated a choice! It's very flattering, but I'm torn.

I'm happy to be accepted to both -- gives my self-esteem a boost because my work and goals struck a chord with programs I admire -- but I actually hope the institutional cost vs. financial aid rules one of them out, so I can feel confident where I go.

[profound_g]

To answer the original question - getting in, but not being able to afford it is worse.

Research has shown that the closer we get the worse it is. Only I don't remember the details. Something about missing planes. Rings a bell for anyone?

[bgreenster]

I say a flat-out rejection is worse. I think it can really mess with you if you get in and can't pay (I shudder to think of this happening next year because I'm not going if I'm not significantly funded) but at least I can then always say that I got in, you know? It's tough to have to be the one more or less making the rejection, but I think I can handle that better in the long run than the ego-blow a rejection would entail. Not being able to attend is definitely a torturous decision to make that can be more emotionally straining at the present, but I think over time I'd like to be able to pat myself on the back for having gotten accepted at all.