What to do when we get there?

[redwine]

Ok, so this topic, like the last one, will lay bear my propensity to stay awake worrying in the night. I spent the last twelve months convinced I would not get into grad school, and now I have been accepted everywhere I applied (pinch me! that 200th rewrite of the SOP paid off!) I am starting to fret convincing myself no way am I ready for the intensity of grad school. Through the whole application process I had merry dreams of myself swanning around Harvard reading hot-of-the-presses monographs and talking with likeminded people, in between sitting in little cafes drinking lattes and writing poetry, and basically finally finding an intellectual home. While these were still pipe dreams they were very happy ones. Now they seem to have morphed into the nightmarish realisation of how much work I'll be doing once I get there (one current grad emailed me today and said minimum 60 hours a week just for the class readings? around which I need to write papers?) and the fact that it will be impossible to have a social life/ever do exercise/ever leave my desk for at least two years. Let alone travel to New York to see my boyfriend.

Can anyone recommend any resources to prepare oneself for this life change? Or any happy stories to counteract those I've been hearing from current grads who may just be in their 3rd year depressed slump that one comes out of eventually? I know of course it will be a lot of work, and that excites me, but is there any way to prepare oneself for just what it will be like? Thought people could share suggestions here!

[samantha20]

I know what you mean!

Now that I have a decent idea of where I will be going in the fall, I am also starting to worry about all the work I have to do as a graduate student.

The first couple years are hard no doubt. A number of people do drop out. However, if you are as dedicated as you seem to be, you will do just fine.

As for preparing, I am planning to do as much reading as possible over the summer while working on my language skills.

[Minnesotan]

The workload is nothing compared to the speed at which the novelty of grad school wears off and the imposter syndrome sets in. I'm just finishing my MA, and it's amazing how many of my colleagues (MA students, PhD students, and even some of the more open professors I've worked with) wonder that they're supposedly experts in their field (and wonder that someone actually thinks they belong here). Self-doubt seems to be paradoxically both the most harmful and motivating force behind the research and writing process -- something that can shut you down for a time, then make you angry enough to write like you are possessed, not sleeping or eating well for weeks!

The best advice I could give anyone just entering grad school is to find a way to strike a balance between hard work and complete relaxation. It may seem silly, but when I first got here, I would not stop working whether I was on a date, at the movies, or attempting to sleep; I was always thinking about my thesis, whether I liked it or not. I hit a slump last summer that set me back a month or two, and it took great restraint to not overwork myself to catch up (only to burn out again, just when I would need to polish and defend my thesis). However you can dip your head in Lethe, do it (well, short of anything dangerous or illegal). Set up two mandatory nights off, and go out drinking, or bowling, or skydiving -- whatever will get you out of the library and into a better frame of mind. I realize this isn't manual labor, and we feel like we should be working seven days a week, but that's not healthy. These degrees aren't a race, and people who treat grad school like a competition will not only fail, but they'll also have a long list of peers who despise them, when the day is done.

Be nice to others, and be nice to yourself.

If you want a couple of helpful books (ones I wish I would have read before I started my grad studies), check out "Playing the Game: The Streetsmart Guide to Grad School," and "Getting What You Came For." Both of which should be available at your university's library, or on the cheap at amazon, ebay, or used book stores.

[Nofia]

I so agree with Minnesotan...there is definitely that sense of being an imposter! I did an MA in museum studies while working full time and as soon as you posted this I was like, my god, doing a PhD is going to be so much different, I will never be able to balance this type of program like I could the museum studies program. ack! panic! Making it through before must have just been a fluke and I must have somehow fooled everyone at NYU into giving me my MA, and they so won't fall for it in a phd program! I'm exaggerating hugely of course, but it helps then to realize this is a harmful mindset, and in reality, I'll get it done the same way I finished my MA a semester early...time management/keeping to a schedule and making sure I put myself first (exercise, eating well, etc.) We're over the first of many hurdles here, have faith in yourself that you'll adjust to the workload and do just fine.

[amanda1655]

I want to add a touch of realism to this discussion. Nofia and Minnesotan are right. Everyone feels like an imposter at one point or another, and you are well-qualified for a hisotry PhD or else you wouldn't have been admitted.

Graduate school, however, is going to be very difficult. You will spend a lot of time studying. I would guess that 60 hours is a bit of an overestimate for reading alone but I don't think it's an overestimate for the total amount of time that you will spend writing and reading. If anything, it might be a slight underestimate. People are going to be uber-competitive. They are going to be brilliant. If you are studying at Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Berkeley, the University of Chicago, Stanford, Michigan, etc. you are studying with some people who are going to be leaders in your field. It will be difficult.

Remember this, though, you are smart enough. You are just as good as they are.

[Canadianpolsci]

Ok, so this topic, like the last one, will lay bear my propensity to stay awake worrying in the night. I spent the last twelve months convinced I would not get into grad school, and now I have been accepted everywhere I applied (pinch me! that 200th rewrite of the SOP paid off!) I am starting to fret convincing myself no way am I ready for the intensity of grad school. Through the whole application process I had merry dreams of myself swanning around Harvard reading hot-of-the-presses monographs and talking with likeminded people, in between sitting in little cafes drinking lattes and writing poetry, and basically finally finding an intellectual home. While these were still pipe dreams they were very happy ones. Now they seem to have morphed into the nightmarish realisation of how much work I'll be doing once I get there (one current grad emailed me today and said minimum 60 hours a week just for the class readings? around which I need to write papers?) and the fact that it will be impossible to have a social life/ever do exercise/ever leave my desk for at least two years. Let alone travel to New York to see my boyfriend.

Can anyone recommend any resources to prepare oneself for this life change? Or any happy stories to counteract those I've been hearing from current grads who may just be in their 3rd year depressed slump that one comes out of eventually? I know of course it will be a lot of work, and that excites me, but is there any way to prepare oneself for just what it will be like? Thought people could share suggestions here!

Look, you were accepted into some of the very toughest programs in any field in the entire world. They like you. You cannot fake that level of achievement. Just relax. They picked you, and they will help you when you arrive to use your god-given gifts to succeed. They want you to succeed. The programs you are into only bet on winners. They think you are a winner and they'll help you to prove them right. Relax. Everyone gets nervous that they fooled everyone.

Again, worst case scenario: you really did fool everyone. Well, then, you are one INCREDIBLE faker, one INCREDIBLE fraud. And to be honest, that level of fraud is even more impressive than straight up credentials.

Here are to citations for you and all like you to check:

1) Groucho Marx's brilliant and profound line: "There are two secrets to this world -- hard work, and honesty. If you can fake those, you've got it made.

2)Machiavelli's chapter in the Discourses on Livy (his longer work, and his greatest) in which he explains that "it is a more glorious thing to succeed by fraud than by force."

Either you had force (eg., your vitae and credentials overpowered them, deservedly so), or you had fraud (you are a fraud who fooled more than a half-dozen professors from each of Harvard and Stanford, and other places). Either way, what are you worried about? Take a cold shower and a glass of red wine.

And one more thing: don't post any more such postings, please (no offense). There are lots of passionate people on this site now who've been rejected by many or even all of their top and less than top picks. Give them a break and spare them this whining and worrying. It's self-indulgent of you and that's the biggest sin of Ivy leaguers. Trust me, you'll be fine. See you at the Harvard admit visit (correct?)

[Minnesotan]

There are lots of passionate people on this site now who've been rejected by many or even all of their top and less than top picks. Give them a break and spare them this whining and worrying. It's self-indulgent of you and that's the biggest sin of Ivy leaguers. Trust me, you'll be fine. See you at the Harvard admit visit (correct?)

Now that you mention it, my level of sympathy is falling quickly. The "Oh, noes! I got in everywhere I applied!" problem isn't much of a problem, if you ask me.

There are some very bright folks on this forum, who are well-prepared for grad work, who did not get in anywhere this year. That is a problem. Having to choose between Harvard, Yale, and Brown (Oh, bother!) is more of a luxury.

[dmh26]

Some books I came across:

How to Get a PhD by Estelle Phillips

What the Best College Teachers Do by Ken Bain (for all future TAs..lol)

And for all you future academics from traditional working class families:

This Fine Place So Far from Home: Voices of Academics from the Working Class by C. L. Barney Dews and Carolyn Leste Law.

[amanda1655]

Someone recommended "Beyond the Great Story" by Robert Berkhofer to me. It's a general overview of recent historiography.

[NSGoddessQ]

Now that you mention it, my level of sympathy is falling quickly. The "Oh, noes! I got in everywhere I applied!" problem isn't much of a problem, if you ask me.

There are some very bright folks on this forum, who are well-prepared for grad work, who did not get in anywhere this year. That is a problem. Having to choose between Harvard, Yale, and Brown (Oh, bother!) is more of a luxury.

Hey now. Not to start a flame war or anything, but I think redwine's got a right to state her thoughts and feelings about the whole "how do you cope with grad school, once you're in?" thing on a public forum devoted to grad school. Especially since the small library of books on the topic suggests that it is a topic of interest to many people.

She created a new topic for both this and how to pass nicely on offers, rather than posting it in the general thread where people are (understandably) upset about being rejected. From what I can tell, she also took care to phrase it in a way that emphasized her own personal worries, not as some sort of goad at people who've had less luck.

redwine got into a lot of schools that people are very competitive about getting into -- she should be congratulated. Still, she can only pick one, and getting in is just the first hurdle, as people on this thread are pointing out. She would have the same problem even if she'd been accepted to only two schools, and even if her accepted schools had been ranked in the third or fourth-quartile, or not ranked at all -- places that most people on these boards overlooked in their (admirable!) pursuit of "the best."

It does suck for the people who weren't admitted anywhere, because this process is an indubitable hassle. You've got some big choices coming up about what to do, and I wish you every bit of luck with them -- and I have faith that you will find some sort of program this year or next year in which you will excel. But just because redwine doesn't have that problem doesn't mean that there aren't other things to deal with and other choices to be made. I don't think that recognizing that and being unsure of the right path counts as whining -- it's just a statement of fact.

These boards have been great for building a sense of community when we were all waiting to hear (some of us are still waiting!). Now that we're moving past the initial "who got in" stage, I'd like to see them continue that way.

[NSGoddessQ]

And for all you future academics from traditional working class families:

This Fine Place So Far from Home: Voices of Academics from the Working Class by C. L. Barney Dews and Carolyn Leste Law.

This sounds AWESOME. I will definitely have to find this...being not quite "working-class" as it is generally defined, but a far, far cry from a six-figure income family.

[Cornell07]

Well, as one of those people who did not get in anywhere, I still can say many many congrats to people like Missycari and redwine who got into a number of top notch programs. I may be envious, but I am not bitter. :mrgreen: They haven't rubbed their good luck in anyone's face and have continued to be supportive of those of us who are less fortunate. I only wish I knew their secrets to application success so that I may too next year face such difficult decisions!

[amanda1655]

I think it does help, however, to remember how incredibly lucky and privileged we are. There are people in the world who never learn to read or write beyond a third grade level. There are brilliant people who were never able to college because they had to help their family by working in the fields. Our problems - Berkeley said "no," I may have to go to an MA program before receiving a PhD, etc. - are incredibly small compared to theirs. One of the reasons that I suggest people take a year off is because it helps place perspective on this whole crazy experience.

Here's my suggestion: Redwine and others, realize that you are incredibly talented and that this experience is going to test you mentally and physically. But, also realize how privileged you are. Take a moment and volunteer. Become engaged in your community. It help take your mind off the PhD program until you get there and it will help you maintain a healthy sense of perspective.