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Please grade and comment on my GRE argument essay.


Sariha

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Argument: Paleo diets, in which one eats how early hominids (human ancestors) did, are becoming increasingly popular. Proponents claim our bodies evolved to eat these types of food, especially bone broth, a soup made by cooking animal bones for several hours. They believe it has many health-promoting nutrients, such as cartilage, which can heal our joints, and chondroitin, which promotes nerve regeneration. Skeptics point out that ingested cartilage can’t replenish cartilage in your knees or elbows and ingested chondroitin doesn’t make our brains any healthier. Yet, there is strong anecdotal evidence that people who consume bone broth have fewer metabolic and inflammatory diseases than those who don’t. Therefore, ancient humans knew something about our physiology that we don’t, and that by emulating the way they ate, we can cure many chronic illnesses.

My Response:

The author of this argument claims that ancient humans had better knowledge of human physiology and followed a diet that prevented metabolic and inflammatory diseases, thus by following the paleo diet, many chronic illnesses can be cured. Though at the first glance it may seem logical, upon observing closely we can find that it is based on many assumptions that, if proven unwarranted, undermine the argument. Firstly, we can question the claim of the proponents that our bodies evolved to eat foods such as bone broth. There is no scientific evidence provided in the argument that supports this claim. Bone broth might be nutritious, but there is no clear data about how exactly ingested cartilage can replenish cartilage or ingested chondroitin can promote nerve generation. Besides, we don't know the efficacy of the ingredients after cooking. Secondly, the author points a piece of anecdotal evidence that people who consume bone broth have fewer metabolic and inflammatory diseases than those who don't. However, anecdotal evidence is not a reliable basis for making such a claim. Metabolic and inflammatory diseases can be caused by various reasons, and diet is just one factor. The author doesn't account for any other factor, or even any other kind of food than bone broth, when he brings up the topic of metabolic and inflammatory diseases. Finally, the author claims that ancient humans knew better human physiology than modern humans, therefore we should follow their diet. The author fails to account for the fact whether ancient humans had access to different food. Maybe drinking bone broth was there only option, and if they had access to other type of diet they would have adopted that. Besides, diagnosis of diseases was not so advanced as it is now, so there is no proof if this diet resulted in curing chronic illnesses. Only by considering anecdotal evidence it cannot be claimed that ancient humans understood human physiology better. Therefore, unless more scientific and empirical evidence is provided, the author's claim that following Paleo diet can cure chronic illnesses is not logical.

 

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