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Please comment and grade on my GRE issue essay.


dilotor
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Argument:

The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

 

 Answer:

The above argument is partially valid, and its validity depends on the perspective or circumstances under which it is analyzed. The luxuries or conveniences available contemporarily can be used as a tool to improve personally or collectively, or to weaken us on many aspects us as well.

Firstly, having luxuries such as  last generation gaming consoles or the possibility to order food through applications on your phone, can spoil a person or prevent them from learning new skills since the easiness provided by some modern online services can facilitate tasks that you would normally have to do, but avoid, because you can choose to have someone else do them for you. In that sense, what would make these technologies good or bad would depend on what you do with the extra free time you have. If a person chooses to order food instead of cooking, and uses that time to slack off, then the technology would be preventing him from being more diligent or learning a new skill. If on the other hand, that same person used the time to learn how to code, then the same delivery application would be helping him save time to become better at something.

Secondly, examples like unnecessary or superfluous luxury items that a person could buy to impress others such as designer clothes, can be analyzed similarly. On one hand, wearing this kind of clothes can be negative if you get into serious debt to acquire them, making you less independent, and weaker financially. On the other hand, wearing these clothes could help others perceive you as a more successful person or professional and improve your business relationships.

In conclusion, the luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life can have many effects on the development of individuals. These effects  can depend on many factors such as the purpose for which they are used and the specific circumstances surrounding and defining that specific individual’s objectives, personality and education, among others.

Edited by dilotor
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