I hate my program

[Fang]

My graduate program has turned into a nightmare. Just to give an idea of how bad it is, of the four people who came in with me, two have left and one is strongly thinking about leaving. Someone in the year above me recently left as well. This has all happened in just one year. The program only had about 20 people in it to begin with.

What's so bad, you ask?

For one, most of the classes are badly organized together. Information is thrown at you in no real order that means anything. There's no grading rubric, grading is very subjective. It seems like if you are a teacher's favorite you automatically get an A, if the professor disagrees with your viewpoint you are given an F. I've compared answers to exam questions between my friends and I and have seen for answers which have the same information and are pretty much equivalent, two vastly different grades are given. No reasoning is ever given for why points are deducted.

Students who struggle are treated coldly by faculty. Faculty gossip and make fun of students who have left. There is massive favoritism.

I struggled my first semester and they took my stipend away and tuition support away. After two semesters I have been one of the top students in my class, yet they won't give my stipend back.

Today when I was arguing with a professor over a grade on an assignment for which massive points were taken off for things that we weren't even told we would be graded on, the professor told me (completely on a tangent in the middle of the grade debate) that it was good I had experience and skills waiting tables in undergrad because I could use those skills for employment in the future.

The longer I go on here, the more miserable I am. I love grad school, I love learning, I know I'm capable of succeeding based on my grades, and I love my field. I am fed up with my program. I don't know if I should leave after a year and a half of being here and work in industry for a while before applying to a different program somewhere else (I mean, I imagine it would be all but impossible to get into another program if you dropped out of one already), or maybe just stay and get a masters and move on to a better school.

After dealing with this crap, I know I do not want to go into academia. It has left the most bitter taste in my mouth. Any advice is appreciated. =(

[art_56]

Hey there,

I am also considering transferring grad programs, and I think there are a few people this year on the boards who are having issues with their programs as well. I've also been told that it's not as hard as you would think to do this. I went to talk to an adviser the other day in the graduate school where I am, and apparently it's not uncommon for them to have people transferring in and out of different programs, due to a variety of different factors. I would look into other programs that you feel are well suited to you, and see if you can visit them so you can get a feel of the faculty and students. Also, look on the Rate Your Professors website to see what other students think of their profs. It's maybe not 100% accurate, but it can give you some guidance on what to expect. In any case, don't fret- you have the possibility of transferring, just do some homework on other programs, and be sure to be clear to them on why you want to leave your current program. Good luck!

[alexis]

OP: Whoa. That is bad. A toxic environment isn't good, and I agree you should try to get out of there. How were they able to take away your stipend? Grades? The whole thing just sounds crazy, and the total opposite of what I've experienced in the short time I've been at my PhD program.

I'm not sure what specialty you're in, but not all PhD programs are like that. There are good ones out there with supportive faculty, clear grading, etc. I've heard about a range of PhD programs & cultures, from hellish (oddly I've mostly heard this about some top ranked programs/ivy league schools) to great. Unfortunately it sounds like you ended up at the bad range of the spectrum.

I wouldn't give up on doing a PhD just because this place is horrible. (And if it's really as you describe, it's likely the program will continue to go downhill fast- and you don't want to be associated with that anyway.) I would leave too if it were like that. Transferring might be difficult, but you should definitely go for it. Is there one faculty member in your current program who could write you a supportive LOR? If so, that will be a big help.

And if you do transfer, make sure to visit the department(s) you are considering and ask the students one-on-one how things are...you will probably get the most honest answers that way (or can read between the lines).

[fuzzylogician]

Wow. I think in your situation I would have already left ... I really admire your ability to stick it out! That said, I think the environment in your department is so toxic that you should cut your losses and leave as soon as you can. You're suffering, you're not being funded, and frankly it sounds like the chances that you'll graduate with a decent thesis aren't great. Not to mention, if the program is this bad, you would not want to be associated with it anyway.

At this point, you could probably use a break from graduate school. if you can get a job outside academia, maybe that's the best thing for you to do right now. Put some distance between yourself and this awful experience. In another year or two, once you've put this behind you, then you can reapply. Don't get discouraged from doing a PhD, if that is your dream, but don't stay in a place that is this unsupportive! If and when you do reapply, make sure to research not only the school's academic strong points but also its social atmosphere. Graduate students are probably the best source of information for this purpose -- ask them and they will usually be very honest about how they feel about their departments. For now, though, just concentrate on extricating yourself from this bad situation! Once it's over, I think you'll have better perspective; then you can make decisions about what to do next.

[matilda]

I would say: keep your head up and try to think of them as a step to get you to your degree...... but, I am not gonna say that.

Because I have been in the situation. And it is ugly. And it makes you bitter and angry, and all you came there for is to work and be better, and to learn. But, you ended up in hating academia.

My grandfather was a surgeon. He had a professor who literally told him: You will not become a doctor as long as I work on this Faculty of medicine.

My grandfather tried to pass this professor's exam, but without success. He came into his office one day, and told him that he is the worst person and professor he ever had, that his behavior is unacceptable and HE IS GOING TO BECOME A DOCTOR ONE DAY, whether this professor liked it or not. He went to another state, passed his exams, and became a surgeon.

You are better than that. I would listen to fuzzylogician's advice.

[Snygard]

I feel my grad program is trying to make content and classes too objective when the subject matter is very subjective. I feel I am thrown a bunch of random facts and information and I'm not getting taught the big picture of it all. What's worse is midterms are coming up and I have all this information for each of my classes and no idea how to organize it. Instead, I feel I have to memorize each and every single fact that I has been given to me since September. The professors aren't willing to help either. They won't meet with you outside of class, they won't answer your emails, they won't give study guides because they "have lives". Well, let me tell you something...you have a life because MY TUITION pays for it! At my old university, I had such an easier time with my classes because professors were more than willing to help you grasp the information efficiently so you could pass the exams, as well as remember the information for years to come. I am so dissapointed in my grad program

[OH YEAH]

You should tell everyone what program you are in so we can make sure to tell our friends to never accept offers from them