woolfie Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 I spent two years refining my list of schools and now all the deadlines have passed and I'm waiting. Yet I can't stop worrying that I will be rejected from all programs, and I even find myself researching MORE schools, like low tier MA programs. I can't stop thinking about it because this is my second year applying, I'm losing my seasonal job this summer, my boyfriend will be done with his graduate program and out of a job, and I just wouldn't know what to do with myself if I were rejected again. I have some "safety schools" that I sometimes feel like I'm sure I should get into at least one of them, but in this economy, in English, there aren't really any safety schools anymore. I'm so anxious right now. So much is riding on this decision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lola80 Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 I spent two years refining my list of schools and now all the deadlines have passed and I'm waiting. Yet I can't stop worrying that I will be rejected from all programs, and I even find myself researching MORE schools, like low tier MA programs. I can't stop thinking about it because this is my second year applying, I'm losing my seasonal job this summer, my boyfriend will be done with his graduate program and out of a job, and I just wouldn't know what to do with myself if I were rejected again. I have some "safety schools" that I sometimes feel like I'm sure I should get into at least one of them, but in this economy, in English, there aren't really any safety schools anymore. I'm so anxious right now. So much is riding on this decision. It's all I think about. I took a five year break after my MA because I didn't think I could afford to get my PhD and there were no programs in my city at the time. I've spent the last 4 years as a public school teacher and have now applied to a PhD program. I'm not sure what to do if I do not get in. My husband and I have just bought a house and moving isn't an immediate option. Now that the application deadline has passed all I do is think about it and wait and wonder if I made the right choice by not applying to more programs, even if it meant moving across the country. I guess all I can now is anxiously wait on a decision and hope it is positive. I waver back and forth between "why wouldn't they want me?" and "why would they want me?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolfie Posted January 23, 2011 Author Share Posted January 23, 2011 It's all I think about. I took a five year break after my MA because I didn't think I could afford to get my PhD and there were no programs in my city at the time. I've spent the last 4 years as a public school teacher and have now applied to a PhD program. I'm not sure what to do if I do not get in. My husband and I have just bought a house and moving isn't an immediate option. Now that the application deadline has passed all I do is think about it and wait and wonder if I made the right choice by not applying to more programs, even if it meant moving across the country. I guess all I can now is anxiously wait on a decision and hope it is positive. I waver back and forth between "why wouldn't they want me?" and "why would they want me?". Me too! I keep wavering between a confident excitement about prospects in the future, to anxiety attacks about what I'll do if I don't get accepted. If I had a permanent job right now, it would be easier, but I'm for sure leaving this job (it's seasonal, long story) and everything is riding on these applications. For some reason, all month I've been fine, but this week the anxiety has just hit me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qbtacoma Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 I'm not feeling anxious yet, but I am annoyed that I applied to one school which, in retrospect, I don't want to really attend. It's not like I just have $100 lying around for applications, so why did I do that? I am annoyed with myself. I could have applied to a lot of other places with great programs, but they are in parts of the country that I don't want to live. Since this is the last time in academia that I pick where I want to go I decided to take that into account, but maybe I won't next year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garbledy Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 This is the exact boat I'm in! I applied to nine schools, and I'm at a point where I feel I shouldn't have even bothered with 4-5 of those nine schools. And NOW I'm at a point where I think the remaining 4-5 "safeties" will even reject me. The admissions process just seems so arbitrary, I feel like my application won't stand out and I'll just be cast off into the "reject" pile for all schools. BLAH.. the only think keeping me from applying to more schools is my $0 bank balance (as a result of applying to more and more schools) and not wanting to bother my recommenders for even MORE letters. I need to learn how not to be crazy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zemzem Posted January 23, 2011 Share Posted January 23, 2011 I feel like I haven't done my homework before sending out my apps. I should have done more research about different schools, programs, funding, etc. But I was so focused on studying for GRE and not flunking it again that I did not spend enough time researching the programs. I think I should have applied to maybe 2 more schools (I only applied to 4). Also, I didn't find this forum until after I submitted most of my stuff. Still, the schools which I selected are top notch and I already got one interview next week, but then again I should have considered "safety" options. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UFGator Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 (edited) I am freaking out. I have only applied to 4 programs so far. Economics undergrad here with a good upper division GPA, but a sad first two years of college. Did well on the GRE, have research, good LOR's etc. Applied to a Ph.D. program for Econ, one for Poli Sci, and for a MS econ program at some safety in state schools. I wish I had tailored my app more some particular schools. I tailored it heavily for one, and then modified for Others. I also just hope that I get in somewhere with a decent funding offer. My big regret is not doing more apps, I started this very late in the game. Edited January 24, 2011 by UFGator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fumblewhat Posted January 24, 2011 Share Posted January 24, 2011 Yeah... I could've (shoulda, woulda...) gone the extra mile to adjust my SOP for a few schools. And "accepted" and "rejected" carry the same consequence for me without funding. If I ever (have the grave misfortune to) go through this process again, I'll make sure to do a wee bit more research about the funding available at each school before applying. Especially as an M.A. applicant... I comfort myself in the knowledge that this is, by and large, a great exercise in luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolfie Posted January 24, 2011 Author Share Posted January 24, 2011 my field is not the most popular thing ever, so i think that i did an okay job of picking schools across the rankings that fit me well. many top programs ala harvard, yale, etc don't really have much going on in my speciality so i was glad i could save myself the rejection letters. i didn't really pay much attention to rankings at all since my choices were immediately limited. Yeah, I think I paid too much attention to the rankings. I wish I'd applied to more Ohio schools, the ones very close to me and in state for me. A professor poo pooed some of them because they were lowly ranked and I listed to her. Now I'm regretting it because I don't care about the rankings, I want my life to be easier and they seem to be fine schools. I also only applied to PhD programs if they were in the top 25, now I wish I didn't care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polarscribe Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 (edited) I think I got a good spread across the spectrum... I only applied to programs where professors expressed interest in my research proposal, and that ended up being a list of programs both large and small, well-known and not-so-well-known in the field. I've already got one acceptance and we'll see how the rest of the applications shake out. Edited January 25, 2011 by polarscribe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
encephalization Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 (edited) I definitely wish I had applied to more schools. If nothing else, just to be able to wait for the results. Everyone seems to be in a lovely agony. Only applied to one US university and only a master at that. Looking back I think my chances for a Ph.D. aren’t that bad and I should have at least given it a shot. Oh well, now it’s all or nothing. If all fails I have a few applications in Europe too but it is almost like I have prepared myself for great US of A. Edited January 25, 2011 by encephalization Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDude Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 (edited) I guess I will see what offers come in, but I'm only really serious about 4 of the 8 I applied to. I mean I fit well with the other 4 I applied to, I guess I just have thought more about the kind of department I want to be in and where I want to live and would be happiest. Doing all of that has put me in a headspace where I am having thoughts like, "Why the hell did I apply there? I don't want to live there...etc." I'm worried being in this headspace will cloud my judgement when it comes to really comparing multiple offers if I am so lucky. Edited January 25, 2011 by musicforfun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolfie Posted January 25, 2011 Author Share Posted January 25, 2011 I guess I will see what offers come in, but I'm only really serious about 4 of the 8 I applied to. I mean I fit well with the other 4 I applied to, I guess I just have thought more about the kind of department I want to be in and where I want to live and would be happiest. Doing all of that has put me in a headspace where I am having thoughts like, "Why the hell did I apply there? I don't want to live there...etc." I'm worried being in this headspace will cloud my judgement when it comes to really comparing multiple offers if I am so lucky. Yeah, I applied to one school purely for their very high stipend for MA students, but I absolutely do not want to live there, and I have no interest in the school. I wish I'd used that money for other schools that I'd rather go to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raputa Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 I've been thinking the same way: I applied to 11 schools, and, when I really think about it, I'm not sure I'd actually want to relocate to a few of these places. I don't want to spend six years (at least) of my life in a place I don't want to be. In addition, I didn't apply in any kind of 'range'; I applied mostly to top programs. I'm in the humanities & it's true--there are no safety schools. The prospect of re-applying next year seems incredibly daunting. The sheer expense of applying to 11 schools pretty much bankrupted me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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