amadeus122 Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 Need some advice, folks. I have four PhD acceptances as follows: 1) Lower-ranked school with full scholarship, no stipend, in undesirable part of the country. 2) Middle-ranked state school with full scholarship and hefty stipend, also in undesirable part of the country, but less so. Get the impression from director that faculty aren't in the business of mentoring doctoral students. They're old and are on campus only one day of the week. 3) Middle-ranked state school with full scholarship and modest stipend. Being pursued actively by Chair (frequent emails and phone calls). Have no doubt that I could make this work, but it's not my top choice. The location is fine enough, but it would mean living apart from my husband, bad weather, very rural area, loneliness, etc. The faculty are first rate, though. 4) Highest-ranked state school dragging its feet on making a funding offer. Emotionally, academically, and geographically this is the best place for me, but how long can I delay making a decision at one of the other schools!? Anyone ask for extensions? Accept at another school and then withdraw?
TakeruK Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 (edited) Definitely ask for an extension! It sounds like you would prefer #4 if funding was equal everywhere and #1 is not desirable at all? The etiquette, I think, is to be as open as possible when doing this, and narrowing down your choices as much as possible (i.e. don't ask for an extension everywhere, just places you are seriously considering). So, it could be recommended that you pick one of #1, #2 or #3 as your "backup" choice and decline the other two. Then, email the two remaining choices saying that you would like a few more days to hear about an offer for school #4. I think the schools would appreciate you being open with them, and I'm sure wait-listed students (if any) at the other 2 schools would appreciate a decision sooner rather than later if you aren't going to attend. Congratulations on getting in by the way! Good luck Edited April 13, 2012 by TakeruK
amadeus122 Posted April 14, 2012 Author Posted April 14, 2012 Thanks for your response, TakeruK! I am in AGONY over this decision. When advisers joked with me that I'd have to make a choice at the end of this application season, I laughed it off. And until recently, it looked as though I only had one choice. Before that, I was convinced that I'd fluffed this year and started looking for jobs. Just goes to you show you that this process is a long one... I went ahead and emailed #'s 2 and 3 to tell them the whole story. Hopefully they will be patient and merciful. I'm sitting on #1 for now, but their letter indicates that their offer will expire on the 15th. Why, oh WHY is the 15th a Sunday this year! Come on #4!
JSmoove Posted April 15, 2012 Posted April 15, 2012 You should decline #1 at least. You don't seem excited at all about the offer, and it doesn't make financial sense since they don't provide a stipend. Just holding onto the offer just to have it until it expires is rude.
comp12 Posted April 15, 2012 Posted April 15, 2012 Definitely ask for an extension (if you haven't done so already)! The worst feeling in the world would hit you, when/if you officially accept a second choice and then go on to receive an accept from your dream choice. Accepting and then withdrawing is an option, but you run the risk of alienating some people in the field that you will likely encounter later.
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