Is it ever too early to turn down an offer?

[pierrebrodieu]

I was accepted to my top two programs and also to one of my much lower-ranked programs with an alright-but-not-incredible fit. I haven't even gotten my full offer letter from the less preferred program, but I know it's not competitive with my other choices (both giving me stipend, 5-year funding, etc).

How early is too early to graciously say no thank you?
Or, should I wait and see what kind of offer they give me and maybe use that as leverage with other programs?

[faculty]

If you know that you're not going to attend the program, it's never too early. 

[uromastyx]

If you know that you're not going to attend the program, it's never too early. 

Agreed. If you're certain then it's better to let them know.

[amlobo]

I declined an offer already that I knew I wouldn't accept.  If you are AT ALL considering the school, don't decline, obviously.  But 100% sure you won't accept?  It's never too early.  

Edited February 14, 2013 by amlobo

[jacib]

I not only declined some offers around this time, I withdrew my applications from some schools even before I heard a decision (this was partly due to switching fields).  But don't feel pressure to decline, and visit every school you're considering, because you don't want to look back in the middle of your second year when you're miserable studying for comps and think "What if I had done this differently!".  However, if you're absolutely sure (like 110%), decline when you know that.

 

Here's the basic version of the letter I wrote to withdraw (someone else asked me for it over PM).  I added other :

 

Dear [whoever told you were accepted, DGS, Chair]

I would like to formally withdraw my application from consideration for the PhD program.  I have been accepted to a program I know I would choose over [this program], and I do not want to deny some other candidate a spot.  I know in this economy many schools  are only doing one round of admits, and not accepting any from the waitlist.  Please tell me if there is any other information you would like me to provide.  Thank you for the time you have already spent looking at my application.

 

[My full name]

 

The actual text varied.  Sometimes I thanked them for more specific things (responding to my emails quickly, etc), sometimes I said other things like how much I liked the department's philosophy and specific faculty members, but the above is the basic template I "riffed" off of.  The "in this economy" is probably dated; this was in 2010 when there was a lot more talk about the Economic Crisis destroying higher education, and people were wondering if all the UCs' faculty were going to leave, if anyone was ever going to get jobs out of graduate school, etc.  (same problems still exist, people just don't make as big a deal out of it even these short few years later).  Again, also, this was withdrawing my app, not declining an acceptance.   If you've been in contact with any specific professors, get in touch with them and thank them personally.

 

Edit: I should add that this is of course not "the perfect template", but you know, it's what I used not knowing any other model.  Just be nice, in general, and don't go on for too long.  This is a normal thing that happens to them many times a year so don't fret over it too much.  I know some schools accept certain students knowing that there's a low probability they'll attend.

Edited February 14, 2013 by jacib

[socgrad2013]

Yeah, it might come off as a bit presumptuous (a) to bring up the economy and how it must be affecting schools' admissions policies, and/or ( assume that your withdrawal results in someone getting in off the waitlist   After all, you could have been rejected, and/or the adcomm might only want the 20 or so people they extended offers to. Just thank them for their time and say that you'd like to withdraw your application (or name from consideration, etc.). If it results in an opportunity for someone else, great! If not, at least you won't be wasting people's time and $$ at the visit days.

[TakeruK]

I was accepted to my top two programs and also to one of my much lower-ranked programs with an alright-but-not-incredible fit. I haven't even gotten my full offer letter from the less preferred program, but I know it's not competitive with my other choices (both giving me stipend, 5-year funding, etc).

How early is too early to graciously say no thank you?

Or, should I wait and see what kind of offer they give me and maybe use that as leverage with other programs?

 

I agree with the others that if you are sure that you aren't going to like this school over the other two, then the right thing is to decline now. I don't think you can use the third school's offer to leverage the first two if you aren't actually interested in attending the third school. I think leveraging offers only really works when you have an offer from a equal or higher ranked school AND that you are actually willing to go to the other school. 

[pierrebrodieu]

Thanks for the input, you all!

[the green saint]

I am going to add an extra dimension to this thread. 

 

I'm from the UK, and put in 3 US applications and about 8 UK ones. My preference is to go the US, and I have been accepted with funding to one, rejected by another and still waiting on the third -  the last of course is my first choice, so I am just waiting in agony.

 

However, the UK system is different to the US one. So on top of the standard PhD application (I feel like they accept most people if the have the minimum standards), to get funding, I have had to work with a variety of potential supervisors in creating, amending and adjusting research proposals that fit the criteria for each funding opportunity. And this process is ongoing, as even today I've had a request to amend my proposal after I got through the first round of cut-off's.

 

My problem is that I want to go the US, and now I have an offer, the UK doesn't matter. However, I don't want to burn bridges, and some professors have put in a lot of their own time into helping me out - and I may need them sometime down the road..... 

 

So currently, I sit here, trying to update a proposal, because the stated objectives are a little 'fluffy' to the committee, knowing that the same proposal has already been accepted and well received in the US.

 

It's all practice, right?    

[SocioEd]

Will you consider to go to the UK schools if you get into there? If yes, it is probably worth doing. If not, personally I think (in the context you described here) the way "not to burn the bridge" is to share the info with the UK professors as soon as you decide that you will not go to these UK programs anyways, and terminate the UK application process asap.

Earlier this week when I received a more or less ideal offer, I immediately declined three offers that are not in competition with this offer. The professors typically replied saying that they thank me for letting them know about the situation, and look forward to see how my work evolves in the future. It is somewhat painful to say no to professors I really like, but delaying this decline will only cost them more.

I am going to add an extra dimension to this thread. 

 

I'm from the UK, and put in 3 US applications and about 8 UK ones. My preference is to go the US, and I have been accepted with funding to one, rejected by another and still waiting on the third -  the last of course is my first choice, so I am just waiting in agony.

 

However, the UK system is different to the US one. So on top of the standard PhD application (I feel like they accept most people if the have the minimum standards), to get funding, I have had to work with a variety of potential supervisors in creating, amending and adjusting research proposals that fit the criteria for each funding opportunity. And this process is ongoing, as even today I've had a request to amend my proposal after I got through the first round of cut-off's.

 

My problem is that I want to go the US, and now I have an offer, the UK doesn't matter. However, I don't want to burn bridges, and some professors have put in a lot of their own time into helping me out - and I may need them sometime down the road..... 

 

So currently, I sit here, trying to update a proposal, because the stated objectives are a little 'fluffy' to the committee, knowing that the same proposal has already been accepted and well received in the US.

 

It's all practice, right?    

[Angulimala]

I recently got accepted in my top choice program and had an interview at anothe place literally 3 days after I recieved my acceptance.  So my airfare, hotel, and all that was already paid for.  Even under such short notice I still told program that wanted an interview that I was not interested anymore and that I did not want to take a potential acceptance away from someone who was 100% set on this particular school.  While I felt like pulled a shit move for flaking out last second, they were actually very happy with what I did.  So after that situation I totally agree that it's never really a bad thing or a bad time to withdraw application or decline offers when you are 100% sure about it.  It is better than wasting people's time, and it allows for those who are interested a better shot.  And thats what I think is most important about withdrawing/declining, it allows others who are interested but not in yet a better shot.

Edited March 2, 2013 by Angulimala

[heathenist]

I recently got accepted in my top choice program and had an interview at anothe place literally 3 days after I recieved my acceptance.  So my airfare, hotel, and all that was already paid for.  Even under such short notice I still told program that wanted an interview that I was not interested anymore and that I did not want to take a potential acceptance away from someone who was 100% set on this particular school.  While I felt like pulled a shit move for flaking out last second, they were actually very happy with what I did.  So after that situation I totally agree that it's never really a bad thing or a bad time to withdraw application or decline offers when you are 100% sure about it.  It is better than wasting people's time, and it allows for those who are interested a better shot.  And thats what I think is most important about withdrawing/declining, it allows others who are interested but not in yet a better shot.

Absolutely.  I recently told my graduate director I wouldn't be continuing on here for my PhD, and while it was a little awkward, I did it to free up funding for other people, and she seemed very appreciative of that.

[RandomDood]

It's not too early.

Especially if you are declining an offer from Stanford

No, seriously, as a waitlisted person I would really like to underline that if you are 100% sure you are not going to attend you should just tell the department asap; just think that by doing so you are probably going to save someone a lot of stress and anxiety.

[galactic1088]

It's not too early.

Especially if you are declining an offer from Stanford

No, seriously, as a waitlisted person I would really like to underline that if you are 100% sure you are not going to attend you should just tell the department asap; just think that by doing so you are probably going to save someone a lot of stress and anxiety.

 

Agreed.  The people who are waitlisted at places, myself included, would greatly appreciate quick and decisive decisions (as much as possible).  Obviously, there is a need to weigh out one's options and make rational, informed decisions, but this can all be done well before the April 15th deadline, in most cases.  People who procrastinate only end up causing undue stress for those waiting for a spot to open up.  Finish your cost benefit analyses and commit to an offer

 

Although, in all honesty, I am sort of stringing along an acceptance or two until I hear back from a couple programs I have been waitlisted from.  But still, the position I am in necessitates this because most folks have not started making decisions, especially at top programs (the likes of which I am still waiting to hear more from ). Until they do, I have no choice but to hold my options open while I wait for the potential of better offers. It's kind of like getting stuck in traffic and waiting for the people in front of you to move around the obstruction, so you can, in turn, move forward.  Right now, I feel like I am moving very slowly forward.  People are still starring at the obstruction trying to figure out wtf to do. I think we are shortly approaching the point where people will be putting their metaphorical sports cars in gear and cruising forward, freeing up more room in their wake. Hopefully this will happen sooner rather than later, but I have a feeling I will be waiting until the end of March/early April...

[oilandvinegar]

A idea for all with multiple offers: as you begin completing visits, consider comparing each program as it comes along. For example, if after visiting programs A and B, you prefer A, release your offer for B. Then when you visit program C, program D, etc., you can do the same, so you're freeing up offers as soon as possible for wait-listed folks. 

[amlobo]

A idea for all with multiple offers: as you begin completing visits, consider comparing each program as it comes along. For example, if after visiting programs A and B, you prefer A, release your offer for B. Then when you visit program C, program D, etc., you can do the same, so you're freeing up offers as soon as possible for wait-listed folks. 

 

This is how I've been approaching my decision, which is coincidentally how I chose paint colors for my house, lol.

[SocioEd]

I have a question about declining the offers...

I have declined three offers through emails, and two of them kindly replied and wished me good luck. But the third one--despite my emails to the DGS and department secretary--never replied. I also did not find a response form in their package, so I cannot possibly send a response form instead of emails.

So what could have happened? Could it be that they are so angry with my decision that they decided to ignore my emails?

[amlobo]

I doubt that it is that they are angry. It could just be that they are busy at this time of year, your email fell through the cracks, and they forgot to respond. Or maybe they didn't think a response was necessary. I wouldn't stress over it

[SocioEd]

I doubt that it is that they are angry. It could just be that they are busy at this time of year, your email fell through the cracks, and they forgot to respond. Or maybe they didn't think a response was necessary. I wouldn't stress over it

Thanks--i know it's unlikely, but still it makes me feel better to hear people say so : )