When your advisor has cancer...

[sadface]

I'm halfway through my first year. My advisor is a new faculty member with no other grad students besides me, and two undergrads. My advisor just told me 2 weeks ago about the cancer diagnosis and almost immediately I have become responsible for the undergrads while my advisor begins surgeries, chemo, and radiation. Other than occasional emails (usually about what I'm to do with the undergrads) I have no actual advisement for myself and my research, which is going to stagnate in probably another month without oversight. My advisor has not told anyone else at our university. Not even the two undergrads. I obviously can't be the one to do that, but I am really struggling emotionally with being a compassionate, sympathetic person who doesn't burden someone suffering with cancer, while also trying to be a grad student who has a future to focus on. My heart is mostly in the former, even though when I am really honest with myself I can see I am being slighted and mistreated. I feel stuck and extremely depressed.

[bedmas]

The situation is really sad but this is so, so unfair to you. They shouldn't be putting this on you, and especially not on your own. I would suggest talking to your DGS, or the chair of the department? The situation is tough since no one else knows best of luck.

[misskira]

I agree... this is the point where you have a frank talk with the advisor.  "I am glad I have been able to help out in these initial stages when you've been processing your diagnosis and creating a treatment plan.  I'm at a point where I need more direction with my project, and the undergrads need more than I can provide, when will we be able to meet?"

 

See what kind of response you get.  If it's not satisfactory, I would go to your next higher up person and explain the situation.  This isn't a fair situation, and while the cancer is unfortunate, you still have to look out for your education and career.

[fuzzylogician]

I agree with the other posters. While this is a sad state of affairs for your advisor, it's unfair of him to dump his professional obligations on you. You should tell him you need more advising and also help with the undergrads and see how he reacts. Likely, the end result will be that you start working with a second professor, either in an official capacity as a new advisor or unofficially in a supporting capacity until your advisor recovers. This is something that your advisor should help you set up (or, if he is unable to, then someone else in your department should help with this). If the response you get doesn't sound good, move on to someone higher up in your department (DGS or department head would be my choices). If you're uncomfortable approaching someone in your department, contact the ombudsperson at your university. They will be able to help you deal with this situation.

[sadface]

Thanks, everyone. This is really helpful advice. I have been worried that it would be insensitive of me to have that frank conversation with my advisor. I keep thinking she should have come to this realization already and initiated the conversation with me. That part, and not cluing in someone higher up at the university, I still don't understand. But it seems there is nothing else I can do.

[fuzzylogician]

Your behavior is commendable, but if she's not planning to tell anyone then this is not going to improve. Give her the chance make arrangements with another professor to help advise you--maybe she can make that happen without revealing her medical condition, and if she does then it's up to her to make that choice--but if she can't make this happen then unfortunately you'll need to tell someone. It's not your fault that you've been put in this position and for now it's probably not hurting your progress too much, but it'll take time for your advisor to be fully back and you'll need the extra support. I don't see a way around this.

[Cookie]

sadface, am so sorry to hear about your prof and the situation her health puts you in.

Firstly, I have known only of the opposite situation (students in failing health, pregnancy or other problems that stagnated their progress).  Their professors were true mensch and did their best to accomodate the students. 

 

In your situation, she is a new prof and you are her FIRST student.  If you dont succeed, she doesnt succeed.  I think that stresses her more than you think.  You said she told you only 2 weeks ago about her cancer, which would have put her in a devastating mental and physical state.  I would say that your professor would definitely have thought of YOU and your prospect, too.  Maybe shes trying to figure that out. 

 

Probably a cliche that I say this:  Give her a little time to adjust to her treatment, and everything else in her life. I'm sure that she considers you a big part of it, and would make sure you are in good hands. If I were you, I would calm down and just carry on with my work, and help out the undergraduate students as much as you can.  Your work has not been affected.  Have some faith in the person that chose YOU to be her first student (and most definitely has high hope in you). 

Edited April 14, 2013 by heartshapedcookie